Hole in my game

[The LadyKiller]

I have taken things easy on the dating scene the past couple of months with work and other responsibilities I needed to get in order. But with the new year starting, I feel it's time to get back to the game. Recently, I have begun talking to a HB who I've known on-and-off for a little while (same social circle). We never progressed anywhere several months back when I asked her out for a drink. While I wasn't technically rejected, I didn't feel the vibe was there and moved on to other HBs. Unless I feel good about my chances, I don't jump making a move.

Though we have crossed paths several times, we haven't really engaged in much chatter until a few weeks ago (she started "coincidentally" showing up in places I was, etc.). One thing I know about HB is she likes to outsmart guys and put them on edge to establish control. Me? I laugh at her tests. I know they're coming and regularly bust her chops with a smirk. I set the pace of our interactions with my more outgoing personality and do a good job of keeping things flowing. The time has been coming to make a move and use the momentum to my advantage.

Until she turned the tables this week. We were briefly texting back-and-forth about a local lottery everyone entered, and after I won a very small monetary prize, joking that, with my "winnings," I can treat her to anything off the value menu at a restaurant in town. She abruptly stopped responding. Ok whatever, girls don't respond all the time, though this was out of character for her. A couple days later, I realized she may have though I was serious. I asked a couple of my friends if a girl would really think a guy would ask her out on that cheap a date (nothing surprises me anymore). Wanting to keep the iron hot, I casually let her know I was kidding, with my usual smile/smirk. She claimed to know I was joking, then we went back to our usual flirting - if she plays her cards right, perhaps I'll take her out somewhere nicer than where I "suggested." She joked that now she has something to work towards.

The hole in my game? I am too impatient, and get in my own head when things stall. I grew up in the city and am accustomed to a fast-paced environment. In terms of girls and dating, this has allowed me to react quickly to any tests or situations, however I don't like waiting around either. When the pace slows down, I feel a little bit out of my element.

I ran into HB today, who started laughing immediately. Evidently, she found the entire thing amusing. At this point, I can only presume she knows what's up. So much for momentum. Fortunately, I have another plate spinning and still feel like I know what I'm doing. But, when you're in a relationship, how do you best deal with things when your girl abruptly halts things/tries to gain control?

 

[The LadyKiller]

I'm not too concerned with social circle game, mostly because I have friends in several different circles and my best bros will back me no matter what. That I can manage. Work is sure to be more of a tightrope, for me as long as it's not with someone in my department who I see everyday, I feel secure (but to each their own; different circumstances).

Nice analogy KingofPuss. Being able to slow the game down to offset my usual fast-paced nature would be a tremendous asset. If we're using sports analogies, I'm similar to a team that blitzes the quarterback regularly, but this time the QB picked it up and threw over the rush. Mixing things up is something I can practice and become less predictable in that regard.