"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Hitting on the girl working retail

Captain Rizz

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Is there a consensus on how to hit on girls at retail/restaurants? I feel like this might be the final boss of pickup. Two things stand out:
  • They're required as a job duty to be warm to customers, meaning that it's hard to pick up genuine IOIs.
  • They are easy to be made uncomfortable and annoyed and because of being between a rock and a hard place.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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SW15

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The idea of approaching women while they are at their jobs containing interaction with the general public is a topic that is somewhat contentious among men.

I've generally believed in not hitting on women at work. It's ideal to meet women who work with the public in settings outside of work. Sometimes, that is not feasible though.

If you really want to hit on a retail worker, the best time to do it is during a slow period. Early afternoons on weekdays are great for this in malls.

The same idea would apply in restaurants.

I made a good thread about this topic, including a broader range of professions of general public workers in 2020.

 

Giovanni SouthSide

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Approaching the “always busy girls” depends in the environment. Most of the time tho I try to avoid hitting on women while they're at work, they're kinda forced to be nice to you, so you can misread their politeness for interest. But if she shoots me hard IOIs then I’m turning gambit and striking. It’s all situational and pivot from there.
I have to be bulletproof confident and have that surge of energy that pulls that out of the back of my brain to execute some smooth fluid verbal exchange with a cute cashier. If there is no customers behind me then it’s a wrap.

At this point in my career, I have banged a lot of latinas that dudes wish was in their stable but every once in a while, I'll run across some top flight sh!t that got me stammering for an opening. When you talk to a fine little mama working, you gotta be quick on your feet , body language essence and on a natural high “social bandwidth” to # close quick like a true capo.
 
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"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Slowhandluke

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Is there a consensus on how to hit on girls at retail/restaurants? I feel like this might be the final boss of pickup. Two things stand out:
  • They're required as a job duty to be warm to customers, meaning that it's hard to pick up genuine IOIs.
  • They are easy to be made uncomfortable and annoyed and because of being between a rock and a hard place.
Easy... 1) Be attractive 2) don't be unattractive

Personally, I look at her... smile coyly, and then say, "You know... I like my waitress with a side of fava beans and a nice Chianti", then I make this totally lip smacking sound with my mouth. Works most of the time... :)
 

Hamurabimbi

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Here was a retail episode.
I went to a place to get of eyeglasses. The girl that was my advisor was cute. We wound up talking for an hour. Her supervisor finally pulled her in the back. She came out & said her supervisor told her she has to see other clients. She then said she worked at a Matcha Tea shop on Valencia & I should come by tomorrow to see her there.
I don’t know what I did to attract her. Other than being friendly & pleasant.
 

CaptFinnBad

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Is there a consensus on how to hit on girls at retail/restaurants? I feel like this might be the final boss of pickup. Two things stand out:
  • They're required as a job duty to be warm to customers, meaning that it's hard to pick up genuine IOIs.
  • They are easy to be made uncomfortable and annoyed and because of being between a rock and a hard place.

It's actually ridiculously easy.

I don't see it as hitting on though. I see it as starting a conversation when in going about during my day.

The key is genuine human interaction! You know talking to people, joking about, making smart assed comments, being genuinely interested in people.

I like to strike up conversations with anyone. It's not just reserved for pretty women. I mostly talk to anyone.

But yeah i'll sometimes think to myself "she's pretty, I'd like to talk to her" so I do.

If the conversation with a pretty women is escalating, starts giving me signals she's into me.
I'll just ramp up the charm . Thinking about fu cking her whilst having the conversation I find helps.


It's mostly about actually being interested in the person that's in front of you and reading emotions, reading them as a person e.t.c.
 
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"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

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