"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Hitting on the girl working retail

Captain Rizz

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Is there a consensus on how to hit on girls at retail/restaurants? I feel like this might be the final boss of pickup. Two things stand out:
  • They're required as a job duty to be warm to customers, meaning that it's hard to pick up genuine IOIs.
  • They are easy to be made uncomfortable and annoyed and because of being between a rock and a hard place.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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SW15

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The idea of approaching women while they are at their jobs containing interaction with the general public is a topic that is somewhat contentious among men.

I've generally believed in not hitting on women at work. It's ideal to meet women who work with the public in settings outside of work. Sometimes, that is not feasible though.

If you really want to hit on a retail worker, the best time to do it is during a slow period. Early afternoons on weekdays are great for this in malls.

The same idea would apply in restaurants.

I made a good thread about this topic, including a broader range of professions of general public workers in 2020.

 

Giovanni SouthSide

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Approaching the “always busy girls” depends in the environment. Most of the time tho I try to avoid hitting on women while they're at work, they're kinda forced to be nice to you, so you can misread their politeness for interest. But if she shoots me hard IOIs then I’m turning gambit and striking. It’s all situational and pivot from there.
I have to be bulletproof confident and have that surge of energy that pulls that out of the back of my brain to execute some smooth fluid verbal exchange with a cute cashier. If there is no customers behind me then it’s a wrap.

At this point in my career, I have banged a lot of latinas that dudes wish was in their stable but every once in a while, I'll run across some top flight sh!t that got me stammering for an opening. When you talk to a fine little mama working, you gotta be quick on your feet , body language essence and on a natural high “social bandwidth” to # close quick like a true capo.
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Slowhandluke

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Is there a consensus on how to hit on girls at retail/restaurants? I feel like this might be the final boss of pickup. Two things stand out:
  • They're required as a job duty to be warm to customers, meaning that it's hard to pick up genuine IOIs.
  • They are easy to be made uncomfortable and annoyed and because of being between a rock and a hard place.
Easy... 1) Be attractive 2) don't be unattractive

Personally, I look at her... smile coyly, and then say, "You know... I like my waitress with a side of fava beans and a nice Chianti", then I make this totally lip smacking sound with my mouth. Works most of the time... :)
 

Hamurabimbi

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Here was a retail episode.
I went to a place to get of eyeglasses. The girl that was my advisor was cute. We wound up talking for an hour. Her supervisor finally pulled her in the back. She came out & said her supervisor told her she has to see other clients. She then said she worked at a Matcha Tea shop on Valencia & I should come by tomorrow to see her there.
I don’t know what I did to attract her. Other than being friendly & pleasant.
 

CaptFinnBad

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Is there a consensus on how to hit on girls at retail/restaurants? I feel like this might be the final boss of pickup. Two things stand out:
  • They're required as a job duty to be warm to customers, meaning that it's hard to pick up genuine IOIs.
  • They are easy to be made uncomfortable and annoyed and because of being between a rock and a hard place.

It's actually ridiculously easy.

I don't see it as hitting on though. I see it as starting a conversation when in going about during my day.

The key is genuine human interaction! You know talking to people, joking about, making smart assed comments, being genuinely interested in people.

I like to strike up conversations with anyone. It's not just reserved for pretty women. I mostly talk to anyone.

But yeah i'll sometimes think to myself "she's pretty, I'd like to talk to her" so I do.

If the conversation with a pretty women is escalating, starts giving me signals she's into me.
I'll just ramp up the charm . Thinking about fu cking her whilst having the conversation I find helps.


It's mostly about actually being interested in the person that's in front of you and reading emotions, reading them as a person e.t.c.
 
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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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