Hilarious OkCupid chat with a major b!tch

[-Gripz-]

Basically messing around on OkCupid and messaged this cute 20 yr old. I opened with "I love you." Little did I know this would happen. Here's the convo. Might be a little long.



Her: I think we're moving a little too fast


Me: Don't push me away!


Her: Too late


Me: So is our date off then?


Her: Yes you ****ed up


Me: Let me get your phone dumber and maybe I can make it up to you another time.


Her: Real smooth


Me: A little too smooth?


Her: You bet your ass


Me: If I'm too smooth then I need to get a little rougher. But how rough should I get?


Her: As rough as possible

(started to get tired of the run around here)
Me: Would you like me to stop messaging you?


Her: Totes (oh god why would you use this word)


Me: Alright then. Good day.


Her: Babyy don't leave me!


Me: Hey don't contradict yourself now!


Her: :'(


Me: Frankly my dear... I don't give a damn!


Her: Rude ass


Me: Indeed


Her: Now I know why I don't date black guys.


Me: If you didn't date black guys before, shouldn't you have known already why you don't date them?


Her: I was reminded. I was only joking.. Get the stick outta your ass. Toodles.


Me: So long



** Wow wtf got into her vag today?** :crackup:

 

[switch]

shewas probably a 400lbs troll sitting on a couch munching doritos.....dont let it get to you

online game is a waste anyway.

 

[djjizzyjeff]

Basically messing around on OkCupid and messaged this cute 20 yr old. I opened with "I love you." Little did I know this would happen. Here's the convo. Might be a little long.



Her: I think we're moving a little too fast


Me: Don't push me away!


Her: Too late


Me: So is our date off then?


Her: Yes you ****ed up


Me: Let me get your phone dumber and maybe I can make it up to you another time.


Her: Real smooth


Me: A little too smooth?


Her: You bet your ass


Me: If I'm too smooth then I need to get a little rougher. But how rough should I get?


Her: As rough as possible

(started to get tired of the run around here)
Me: Would you like me to stop messaging you?


Her: Totes (oh god why would you use this word)


Me: Alright then. Good day.


Her: Babyy don't leave me!


Me: Hey don't contradict yourself now!


Her: :'(


Me: Frankly my dear... I don't give a damn!


Her: Rude ass


Me: Indeed


Her: Now I know why I don't date black guys.


Me: If you didn't date black guys before, shouldn't you have known already why you don't date them?


Her: I was reminded. I was only joking.. Get the stick outta your ass. Toodles.


Me: So long



** Wow wtf got into her vag today?** :crackup:

Dude you should be fully aware that chicks who need online dating are on those sites for a good reason...And there's nothing "good" about it.

You can get several to respond by simply doing what I've done to troll online dating sites for the fun of it in the past:

Send them this:

"Can I be completely honest with you...?"


They WILL reply as it get's their insecurities going as you haven't just "bashed" them for a reply.

When they reply make up some retarded answer like:

"Ok. Cool. I want to purchase that profile of yours..I FRIGGIN LOVE IT! You sell it. I buy it. Period. No debating! Your selling price in 5....4....3....2....1....GO."


Or go directly for their number:

"Ok cool. Give me your number. I want to meet up with you. NO DEBATING! "

You'd be amazed how many chicks I can get by sending the most asinine first messages to.

Try it out.

 

[-Gripz-]

Dude you should be fully aware that chicks who need online dating are on those sites for a good reason...And there's nothing "good" about it.

You can get several to respond by simply doing what I've done to troll online dating sites for the fun of it in the past:

Send them this:

"Can I be completely honest with you...?"


They WILL reply as it get's their insecurities going as you haven't just "bashed" them for a reply.

When they reply make up some retarded answer like:

"Ok. Cool. I want to purchase that profile of yours..I FRIGGIN LOVE IT! You sell it. I buy it. Period. No debating! Your selling price in 5....4....3....2....1....GO."


Or go directly for their number:

"Ok cool. Give me your number. I want to meet up with you. NO DEBATING! "

You'd be amazed how many chicks I can get by sending the most asinine first messages to.

Try it out.

Wow, I just tried your suggestion and when I asked for her number she said, " Sorry I'm white. Ur not gonna control me like some black woman". Geez whats with the black thing today?

 

[djjizzyjeff]

Wow, I just tried your suggestion and when I asked for her number she said, " Sorry I'm white. Ur not gonna control me like some black woman". Geez whats with the black thing today?

Fvg it. Send her a reply: Quiet toots or I'm putting you back in your cage!

 

[betheman]

Wow, I just tried your suggestion and when I asked for her number she said, " Sorry I'm white. Ur not gonna control me like some black woman". Geez whats with the black thing today?

send her a reply telling her you are reporting her to (whichever OD site your sue) for racism

 

[-Gripz-]

Used djjizzyjeff's opener again and decided to throw something different in. Here's how it went.

Me: Can I be completely honest with you?...


Her: What?


Me: I want your phone number, but I know you won't give it to me because you don't find me attractive.


Her: I'm not going to give it to you because that's not how you approach someone. In your first interaction with someone you don't make judgements, side note for future girls you approach. Confidence is attractive so try not assuming things that make someone sound shallow and get to know them.


Riiight...

 

[plate's_empty]

Me:If I'm too smooth then I need to get a little rougher. But how rough should I get?

Her: As rough as possible

Me: Would you like me to stop messaging you? (WTF?)

She threw one down the middle of the plate. Swing and a miss.

Anytime you have the opportunity to start taking the conversation sexual. Take it. Sexual innuendos are key.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Her: I'm not going to give it to you because that's not how you approach someone. In your first interaction with someone you don't make judgements, side note for future girls you approach. Confidence is attractive so try not assuming things that make someone sound shallow and get to know them.

....And later that day she got ravaged by the most attractive guys that messages her.

 

[-Gripz-]

The first half of your interaction with the first girl was golden. This ^ conversation however, was lame. The girl was right to diss you I would have done the same.



Instead of saying "would you like me to stop messaging you?" I would have said "so how rough do you like it" or "so you like getting slapped around?" for some laughs. NEVER ask a girl if she wants you to stop messaging her lol

Yeah I probably should have thrown an innuendo in there with the first girl, but I still think the outcome would have been the same. Next time I can get a girl to actually respond I'll certainly take your advice.

 

[-Gripz-]

Ok what the hell. Turns out the first girl is a Youtuber with a channel called "Jorden and Christina". The chick I was talking to is the one with the red hair. Can't believe I thought she was "cute". She really is nothing special.. Women and their camera tricks. Here's the channel

http://www.youtube.com/user/JORDENandCRISTINA/videos

 

[Mr_Stinky]

Ok what the hell. Turns out the first girl is a Youtuber with a channel called "Jorden and Christina". The chick I was talking to is the one with the red hair. Can't believe I thought she was "cute". She really is nothing special.. Women and their camera tricks. Here's the channel

http://www.youtube.com/user/JORDENandCRISTINA/videos

She sounds like a dude!

Also, FUKK that noise. She is a racist fukker who doesn't deserve your time. On to the next one