High Anxiety, Depressed...need Help

[MR.ALPHA]

I don't know how many of you guys have experienced bouts of high anxiety and/or depression, but it seems that I am in the middle of an emotional funk that has really affected my social life and libido.

Not too long ago, I was really in good spirits and would go out almost every weekend with friends. I had several girlfriends too boot. But know, I don't have the urge to do anything. I have been spending almost all of my free time at home. The weekends are the same. I even get hit on by beautiful women and I get their numbers, but I just don't have the desire to do anything anymore and it is driving me crazy.

I admit that I currently have extra financial burdens and it seems that I am experiencing a lot of pressure at work, etc. What can I do and is there any kind of effective treatment?

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

for anxiety, go here:

www.panic-anxiety.com

He helped me alot and i didn't need meds. I was really nervous and felt sick to my stomach for months... I could barely function and became a hermit. Charles Linden's method got me back on track.

Chances are that your depression is a result of the mounting anxiety.

Stay away from the meds unless you've exhausted all other avenues.

 

[Titanium]

There’s many ways to approach anxiety and depression, and I think it mostly depends on what you’re open to trying. I agree with The Bad Ass, that one should not turn to meds unless neccessary.

If its possible, can you talk more about how this all started for you, and what was the onset? (ie a failed relationship for example?).

Don’t feel too frustrated with the apathy you’re experiencing (ie staying home, not going out) – it sucks, but it may be giving you a rather important message - that something needs to change (whether its emotionally / mentally / physically/ externally).

We don’t hold ourselves back without reason, and when you solve this for yourself, you’ll be a better man in the end.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

amd I'll add to what titanium said.

Most times, anxiety and depression are your body's way of telling you something needs to change. They are symptoms not afflictions. Once you realise this, it becomes easier to deal with the core problem which is an obviously messed up thought process and lifestyle.

There's something you've been doing (or not doing) that has led to you feeling the way you do.

You've probably slowly painted yourself into a corner that you feel like you can't get out of... I know that's how I felt.

 

[Shiftkey]

Fix your problems. You're already identified them, now think of a solution and take action on that solution.

 

[Porky]

talk to your doctor about it.

medication should be a last resort, but it's nothing to be ashamed of and certainly does help.

 

[Shiftkey]

talk to your doctor about it.

medication should be a last resort, but it's nothing to be ashamed of and certainly does help.

In his situation, all medication would do is cover up the problem. He would be far worse off with it.

 

[Titanium]

I admit that I currently have extra financial burdens and it seems that I am experiencing a lot of pressure at work, etc.

A few more things to add in regards to the above…

Sleep makes a big difference when we’re experiencing pressure, stress, and anxiety. Try to get 1.5 -2 more hours of sleep than you would normally get. 8 or 9 hours of sleep during stressful times is really good. When work gets particularly hard-core go to bed at nine o’clock pm...no kidding.

By sleeping more, not only will you function better mentally, and feel less stressed overall….but this will also allow your body to rest and repair from the physical damage that stress causes.

A B vitamin complex with all the B’s….and also Omega 3-6-9. Eat healthy. Exercise (like running) releases good chemicals to the brain.

Feeling well involves covering 3 main bases – emotional, spiritual, physical. With the above you are at least covering a lot of the physical part.

 

[MR.ALPHA]

I admit that I currently have extra financial burdens and it seems that I am experiencing a lot of pressure at work, etc.

A few more things to add in regards to the above…

Sleep makes a big difference when we’re experiencing pressure, stress, and anxiety. Try to get 1.5 -2 more hours of sleep than you would normally get. 8 or 9 hours of sleep during stressful times is really good. When work gets particularly hard-core go to bed at nine o’clock pm...no kidding.

By sleeping more, not only will you function better mentally, and feel less stressed overall….but this will also allow your body to rest and repair from the physical damage that stress causes.

A B vitamin complex with all the B’s….and also Omega 3-6-9. Eat healthy. Exercise (like running) releases good chemicals to the brain.

Feeling well involves covering 3 main bases – emotional, spiritual, physical. With the above you are at least covering a lot of the physical part.

Thanks for your responses. Some really excellent responses here.

I have been getting more sleep. It seems that during stressful times, the body automatically shuts down and causes you to sleep more often than usual. I have always been in good physical shape so that is not a problem. In addition, I always maintained a good diet. Without exercise and
and good nutrition, I would be in really bad shape as stress and depression really does cause damage if you let it.

I have decided to confront whatever problems are causing the stress and anxiety. I have always believed that confronting your fears is much better than avoiding them. In the past this attitude has gotten me through rough times. I will survive and get back the life I had before and be the person I was before.

 

[Celadus]

I go through high anxiety and high depression when I am home(I am now). I was really shy in high school and have no life here. You have to learn to use the anxiety and depression to your advantage. Think of it as motivation. Extra energy to accomplish what you want. Use your energy to find a solution to your money and work problems. It's hard but I've learned in the four years since I graduated that nothing good comes easy..

I just got back from working in Alaska for a month and I'm getting ready to drive to Las Vegas to start my dream life. If I wasn't high anxiety I'd be working in a grocery store. Anxiety is a good thing, you just have to learn to control it. Force yourself to go out with these women you are getting numbers from. Force yourself to have fun and you'll wake up one morning and you'll feel a lot better.

Anxiety causes a downward spiral. If you don't exert the excess energy it'll bury you. You get more anxious and it'll take more effort to force yourself out of it. Look at people who are scared to leave their house. I've definitely had days like that but if you don't walk out the door, you become a little weaker and it takes more strength to walk out the next day.

Celadus

 

[everywomanshero]

This kind of stuff will literally squash your game. Male depression is very widespread. Look, there is some really great stuff online. The best I've seen is:
http://www.csulb.edu/~tstevens/anxiety.htm

Try that, if this hasn't worked within 2 weeks, then you need professional help to diagnose the specific causes of your problem and develop a plan to correct the negative thought and emotional patterns. The macho stuff on this site about "be a man, you can do it yourself...." isn't productive. What I want to see if you have a life filled with women, and that's never going to happen unless you take corrective action. Seeing someone who can diagnose and treat you is going to speed this process and help make sure you're on the right track.

If you're depressed, then you're just another boring, depressed guy who hates his life to women. Believe me women get this all the time. Be a rebel man, be unique, be the ONE guy in a hundred that beats his male depression and becomes the master of his own mind. Remember the famous quote, if you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten.

Take the pill man, take the ****ing pill... then go do kareoke, go to a roller coaster, go grind some hawtie on the dance floor jsut for a cheap thrill, finally go up to some random chick and seduce her like a moment out of a movie. That's what I want for you man. That's what you're capable of doing. Take the first step brother. Start lving life today. At the end of life do you want to have been the guy who did it all, or the guy who let it all pass him by because he was too ashamed to admit he needed help? Who will laugh last, the guys on thsi forum who live in shame and talk tough on the internet or the guys who went out and did whatever it took to have a kickass lifestyle. I hope you make the right choice man, because this issue will keep haunting you over and over until you face it.

 

[Titanium]

I've been thinking about this for the last few days...and how most of us unanimously said try everything you can before turning to meds.

I think some of us believe that there is a big component to anxiety / depression that we have to fix ourselves, whether one decides to medicate or not. And a hesitation I have, is that some doctors are rather prescription crazy.

everywomanshero....in regards to your 'macho' comments - fair enough, I understand where you're coming from. I must say that about five years ago, I didn't believe in depression...I thought people who took meds were screwed up losers. In the past few years, I've taken a 180 degree turn on that sentiment, and whenever I see a thread like this one, I take it very, very seriously. When someone has anxiety and depression, they are suffering.

It all begs the question - how do we know when its time to consider medication? Its a very difficult question, and one that I'll never feel entirely comfortable advising another on. But if I had to come up with some form criteria for myself, it might look like this:

1. if my depression/anxiety persisted for more than a year despite my alterantive efforts.

2. if I judged that my job was being effected, or possibly in jeopardy.

3. if I found myself tempted to self medicate with alcohol or any other substance.

The above would be indicative enough for me to consider that my efforts to 'deal' were not enough, alone. And I would discuss my options with a doctor.

That said...there are anti-anxiety medications (like benzos) that are fairly subtle and considered 'safe' that may make a substantial difference for someone. On the other hand, it would be unfortunate to get caught up in that for many years. Hence, the hesitation that some people feel.

Its all personal choice, and ultimately, we each have to define our own 'criteria', per se.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I've been thinking about this for the last few days...and how most of us unanimously said try everything you can before turning to meds.

I think some of us believe that there is a big component to anxiety / depression that we have to fix ourselves, whether one decides to medicate or not. And a hesitation I have, is that some doctors are rather prescription crazy.

everywomanshero....in regards to your 'macho' comments - fair enough, I understand where you're coming from. I must say that about five years ago, I didn't believe in depression...I thought people who took meds were screwed up losers. In the past few years, I've taken a 180 degree turn on that sentiment, and whenever I see a thread like this one, I take it very, very seriously. When someone has anxiety and depression, they are suffering.

It all begs the question - how do we know when its time to consider medication? Its a very difficult question, and one that I'll never feel entirely comfortable advising another on. But if I had to come up with some form criteria for myself, it might look like this:

1. if my depression/anxiety persisted for more than a year despite my alterantive efforts.

2. if I judged that my job was being effected, or possibly in jeopardy.

3. if I found myself tempted to self medicate with alcohol or any other substance.

The above would be indicative enough for me to consider that my efforts to 'deal' were not enough, alone. And I would discuss my options with a doctor.

That said...there are anti-anxiety medications (like benzos) that are fairly subtle and considered 'safe' that may make a substantial difference for someone. On the other hand, it would be unfortunate to get caught up in that for many years. Hence, the hesitation that some people feel.

Its all personal choice, and ultimately, we each have to define our own 'criteria', per se.

The thing is that anxiety is generally self-inflicted, wether we want to admit it, or not. It is nothing more than a habitual way we've trained ourselves to think and the only way to cure it is to forget we have the probelm, in the first place.... Most people who are nervous obsess about their anxiety all day long; I did the same. Once i realised that i was to blame for the cycle, I started focusing my attentions on activities that made me forget i was nervous. Watching TV is not good. I'm tlaking the types of activities where you are so absorbed in what you are doing that you'd miss an earthquake. A passion you can focus on. After some time, the brain will "rewire" it'self and the anxious feelings will go away.

Meds will only cover up the problem like putting a bandaid over a scar. Take it away and the scar is still there.

 

[everywomanshero]

It's about getting what you want in life and having lasting happiness. If you're not getting the result you want in life, then you must find the most likely route to solving this. Depression or other mental disorders is a common problem that prevents people from having success in life, but only when it's not dealt with.

Mystery is the most highly touted PUA, did he refuse the medication and live a life without result? One of Bill Clinton's speech writers had to be medicated.

Being Medicated isn't a sign of weakness, but refusing to do what's needed to fix one's problems is a sign of a life without success.

The stuff about getting in touch with your feminine side or screaming into a pillow to let out childhood frustrations has fallen out of favor. People having this idea that mental health professionals are all quacks is no more realistic than saying all Christians use snakes in their services or bomb abortion clinics.