"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Here's a desperate question

DJnoob

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Ok guys,

I grew up most of my life not being liked by women, until lately..

Ive lost lots of weight, gained more muscles, look 200% better than last year.

So, I still have that "why would she want to fvck me mindset"... and that my current problem.

I don't know whether women actually like me or they like me as in like ME

Sometimes I get a feeling that women would trick me into believing that they REALLY like me up to the point where we would exchange numbers and then POOF nothing happens just to see what actions i may take

SO yeah.. i get a feeling they they want to "TRICK ME". Anyone get this feeling sometime?

Im serious about this question, and not trolling.

Thanks
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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saki

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DJnoob said:
So, I still have that "why would she want to fvck me mindset"... and that my current problem.

Thanks
You need to work on your "inner game" Tell yourself that you are attractive and that girls would be delighted to fvck you. Keep telling yourself that. When you pass by girls and they are giving you buying signals, tell yourself, "that girl wants me so bad, she wants me to fvck her brains out!" You have to brainwash yourself to the point that you instill that frame and it becomes habit. Its the same thing that happens to people that have shiity parents that tell them theyre no good and that they wont amount to anything, after awhile, you seriously start to believe that shiit, and it takes years and years of work to shake it off.
 

Caveman

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saki said:
You need to work on your "inner game" Tell yourself that you are attractive and that girls would be delighted to fvck you. Keep telling yourself that. When you pass by girls and they are giving you buying signals, tell yourself, "that girl wants me so bad, she wants me to fvck her brains out!" You have to brainwash yourself to the point that you instill that frame and it becomes habit. Its the same thing that happens to people that have shiity parents that tell them theyre no good and that they wont amount to anything, after awhile, you seriously start to believe that shiit, and it takes years and years of work to shake it off.
He's right. No matter how silly it seems, if you hear something often enough you start to really believe it.

Not only does this work when you tell yourself, it also works when you tell others positive things about yourself that may or may not be true. Even if they don't believe you right away, after a while they will take your word for it.

You can tell yourself you're a GOD every day but be careful though not to overdo it when telling others how good you are. ;)
 

DJ Alejandro

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yes, your inner game is what you need to develop. think about it. you say that.. "Ive lost lots of weight, gained more muscles, look 200% better than last year."
thats it. again..think about it.
 

JonJack

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Ummm.... The whole idea behind telling yourself something until you actually believe it is something I wouldn't recommend. First of all, I doubt it would work effectively in the long run. It could work, however, the person you would become is the kind of person I don't respect much.

First of all, for it to actually work, you will have to actually be convinced that you are who you say you are. Your mind will actually have to believe that you are that attractive and that you are that stud that women would want. Any doubts that you may have would render this whole exercise a failure. And these doubts will most likely occur if you're not good at brainwashing yourself as it is extremely difficult to be 100% successful with women. If you've got no doubts, then how you handle the rejection is important. Blame the girl, and you'll be blaming women the rest of your life. This is so because to blame someone else is to put the prerogative to change on someone else instead of on yourself. If you decide to change because you're the one that has to improve, then you didn't exactly convince yourself very well that you're all that jazz.

In my opinion, the understanding of human behaviour and human nature is a better way of changing your mindset. You have to realize and accept your place in this world and work from there to better your position. Not every girl is going to treat you nice and be the kind of girl you want. Some can be rude, some can ignore, some can string you along, some can just use you. This is just the way human beings are. You can't change this but you can change the way you expect things from them.

Never expect others to treat you with dignity and respect. You can only think that they will. And if they don't, it doesn't come as a shock or something that has to devastate you because you've already understood that these kind of people do exist and you already know how you're gonna treat them. The reason a person gets devastated is because they take it as a personal attack or insult. It's as if this person doesn't like me, no one will. If you seriously believe this, then the only advice I have is to actually surround yourself with people that like you. Allow yourself to understand that you are likeable, but just not to everyone.

You could always be full of confidence and talk about how good you are and shyt like that. But if you ain't got the consistency and results to back up your talk, no one is gonna respect you. The phrase, "You talk the talk, but can you walk the walk?" explains this.

Whether or not someone wants to trick you is irrelevant. What's so bad with being tricked anyway? They could very well want to kill you. Or rob you. Or marry you and take all your money. Or fvck your good friend. Or embarass you in front of everyone. Or get back at they ex by making them jealous. There's so many shyt that people can and are capable of doing. If you want to protect yourself from all this, I doubt you would enjoy yourself very much. You are what you believe you are and not what you tell yourself you are. And if you believe you're this pathetic loser that has no self-esteem and low confidence which every single girl on this planet is trying to trick, then that's exactly who you are. If you don't want to be that person, then believe you're better than that.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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duttylove

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DJ noob, firstly stop caring what people think. if they dont like you f**k em. it sounds to me like you havnt really been in the field much. go out meet people. you will find that most woman arnt ****. they work crappy jobs with minimal wage. live with parents etc. why do u care if they like you or not. you need to get into the mentality that you are the king of YOUR WORLD. and its up to you weather you let people become a part of it. not up to them if they wana join. u get me?

try this. every morning when you get up. get up a little earlier. have a coffee or what ever put some smart clothes on and take a look in the mirror. realise you ARE the sh1t and woman are lucky to be with you. according to phsycology (scuse spelling) it takes 21 days for somethign to become a habbit. once you get into the habbit it will stick more! its all about your inner game and how you percieve your self compaired to how others percieve you.

if your a shy kid afraid of woman but act like you are ****y and confident you will come accross as a clown. if you BECOME that ****y confident person you will not! you have to BECOME what you want to be not act it.
 

everywomanshero

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Do you not see what changed. Women didn't change.

There was probably women who liked you before, but because you didn't like yourself, you didn't see it. You looked for evidence that women didn't like you. Now, you made soem changes and you look for evidence that people like you more too, so now you see it. Whatever you believe, you find evidence to support.

Positive self talk is something that I personally feel is important. I have only seen a few studies on this and those were positive at 24 months, there could be others I am unaware of. In the meantime, I would try affirmations. You can easily find a copy of "Feel the fear and do it anyway". It's a good motivator if nothing else comes out of it. You have to break the negative patterns inside yourself or you will subtly DLV the hell out of yourself with little things you say without even realizing it.

Secure sources of sex. Nothing raises my spirits more than sex. Do some heavier girls if ya have to.
 

DJ Alejandro

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im thinking that youre still adjusting to your new self. i dont believe what im saying either. but this could be the case.
you say your bodys better and everything. you should work on believing yourself then believing IN yourself.

and hey.. just for the record.

that line "why would she want to fvck me mindset", reminds me of someone i know. shed often ask that "why the hell would HE want to fvck me?". yeah.. shes well on the way right now.

but then again.. just for the record.
 
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