"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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herding chicks with chicks!!

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hey peeps....whoever said lonesome huntin trips work better than thoz with yo crew had better eat back those words especially if the crew at hand is of the female gender:D ...
recently a hit club with like 4 of ma home galz...yo trust me that was the best huntin trip i had in ages son!!..a mean i met letisha ..latania ..latavia..name it all...and guess what....each had a pal who had a pal and so on...kinda stretches the possibilities huh?:D ...a mean you fail with one theres ten more yu can holla at...

let alone that....all femalez in tha club wanted to know who i waz walkin with all thoze broads...gettin served drinks..pats..hugs and ****..even tha dancin waz hektik..

ok this isnt for greedy peeps who want to poke ribs str8 away...coz trust me that night a went home solo...but at least i had cultivated new exploits and as i speak...am currently on gal number 3....not bad for patience .. eh?:D
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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T

tj

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Originally posted by Desdinova
First of all, I can barely read a fvcking word you write.
Second, When sarging solo, draw women to yourself and you will reap the benefits.
Bro, do you start off every post with "first of all." Secondly, look at your own grammer moron. Geesh, you really have alot of work to do. No wonder you aren't getting laid.
 

squirrels

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Originally posted by tj
Bro, do you start off every post with "first of all." Secondly, look at your own grammer moron. Geesh, you really have alot of work to do. No wonder you aren't getting laid.
What's wrong with his "grammer"? :p
 
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heyyyyyyyyyy

what? not gettin' laid?..me?...aww com'mon....ma **** is poetry to the ladies...as for the grammer.....ya'll understood it!!

otherwise thanx for readin' anyway....:D
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Engetsu

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Originally posted by squirrels
What's wrong with his "grammer"? :p
My thoughts exactly, lol.
 

Desdinova

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Secondly, look at your own grammer moron.
I wasn't attacking his grammar. It seems that Pimpin' may actually have some decent advice to give, but it's hard as hell to read it with all the internet and street lingo mixed together. I've never claimed to be perfect in spelling or grammar, nor do I expect anyone else to be. I just can't read a post when the person goes overboard on slang and bastardized spelling.
 
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Yo playa, I sent you a PM. You don't belong hurr you dig. This is a vanilla place that doesn't speak the lingo of da streets...most of these heads are way too uptight and nerded out homie.

So you keep on gettin laid while these knuckleheads keep gettin played and we can meet in a betta environment.
 

B9

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Originally posted by evolvingnerd
shouldn't it be wrote?
no, it shouldn't. nothing wrong with the 'grammer' in that post actually, except a capital 'H' in 'when' which obviously has no place after a comma.

ban desdinova, the uneducated freakshow.:mad:
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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oookayyy.....

seemz av raised enuff dust in hurr(damn a love the slang)...peeps thanx for tha support...by tha way desinova..a got good english but a jaz prefer tha slangz...thez poetry in em' if yu really tried to rhyme with em'...yu need a rhythm in yo life son...pimpin depends on it..trust me..tha ladiez love rhythm...lemme aks yu a question son...if a waz to stand with yo grammer teacher tryin to compete for some ass...yu think he would go far?..ehehe. .as for the rest of the undastandin' hommiez..pimp on pimp strong...

by the way a got newz...some chick jaz propozed to me...am seriuosly puttin a thought on it...
 

Desdinova

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if a waz to stand with yo grammer teacher tryin to compete for some ass...yu think he would go far?
Depends on what the grammar teacher knows about women. :D

I agree that you don't need to spell to be great with the women, but it's a necessity if you want to convey your thoughts, ideas, tips, and experiences to others over the internet.
 

check_mate_kid_uk

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Re: oookayyy.....

Originally posted by pimpin' reloaded>>
seemz av raised enuff dust in hurr(damn a love the slang)...peeps thanx for tha support...by tha way desinova..a got good english but a jaz prefer tha slangz...thez poetry in em' if yu really tried to rhyme with em'...yu need a rhythm in yo life son...pimpin depends on it..trust me..tha ladiez love rhythm...lemme aks yu a question son...if a waz to stand with yo grammer teacher tryin to compete for some ass...yu think he would go far?..ehehe. .as for the rest of the undastandin' hommiez..pimp on pimp strong...

by the way a got newz...some chick jaz propozed to me...am seriuosly puttin a thought on it...
rythem is not an excuess not to form proper sentances. Dam dude your almost as bad as i am:p
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Re: Re: oookayyy.....

Originally posted by check_mate_kid_uk
rythem is not an excuess not to form proper sentances. Dam dude your almost as bad as i am:p
What you gotta realize is this head is from the Mother Land and they speak with a certain Rythem. You can almost hear his words as you read them.
 

DJDamage

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This discussion reminds me of the movie Airplane lol

Note: Actual dialog from the movie airplane with actual subtitles provided by the movie.

Jiveman1: Sheeeet, man, that honkey mus' be messin' my old lady got to be runnin' col' upsihd down his head!
- Subtitle: GOLLY, THAT WHITE FELLOW SHOULD STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE OR I WILL PUNCH HIM.

Jiveman2: Hey Holm, I can dig it! You know he ain't gonna lay no mo' big rap upon you man!
- Subtitle: YES, HE IS WRONG FOR DOING THAT.

Jiveman1: I say hey sky, s'other say I won say I pray to J I get
the same ol' same ol.
- Subtitle: I KNEW A MAN IN A SIMILAR PREDICAMENT, AND HE ENDED UP BEING SORRY.

Jiveman2: Knock yourself a pro slick. Gray matter back got perform' us' down I take TCBin, man'.
- Subtitle: DON'T BE NAIVE ARTHUR. EACH OF US FACES A CLEAR MORAL CHOICE.

Jiveman1: You know wha' they say: See a broad to get that bodiac lay'er down an' smack 'em yack 'em.
- Subtitle: EARLY TO BED, EARLY TO RISE, MAKES A MAN HEALTHY, WEALTHY AND WISE

Together: Col' got to be! Yo!
- Subtitle: HOW TRUE!

Together: Sheeeeeeet!
- Subtitle: GOLLY.

Elaine : Would you gentleman care to order your dinners?
Jiveman1: Bet babe, slide a piece a da porter, drink si' run th'
java.
Subtitle: I WOULD LIKE THE STEAK PLEASE.
Jiveman2: Lookie here, I can dig grease and butter on some
draggin' fruit garden.
Subtitle: I'LL HAVE THE FISH.


Jivemn2 : Mnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Attndnt : Can I get you something?
Jivemn2 : S'mo fo butter layin' to the bone. Jackin' me up.
Tightly.
Attndnt : I'm sorry I don't understand.
Jivemn1 : Cutty say he cant hang.
Woman4 : Oh stewardess, I speak jive.
Attndnt : Ohhhh, good.
Woman4 : He said that he's in great pain and he wants to know
if you can help him.
Attndnt : Would you tell him to just relax and I'll be back as
soon as I can with some medicine.
Woman : Jus' hang loose blooood. She goonna catch up on the`
rebound a de medcide.
Jivemn2 : What it is big mamma, my mamma didn't raise no dummy, I dug her rap.

Woman4 : Cut me som' slac' jak! Chump don wan no help, chump don git no help. Jive ass dude don got no brains anyhow.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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