Her hamster is spinning. What do I do now?

[El Payaso]

There's a girl and we've been seeing for a little while. The sex is good and everything but I can feel her interest waning and she's flaked on me last week. Therefore, I've pulled my attention on her drastically. Two days ago, I set up a date with her for this evening.

However, I had a gut feeling she was going to flake so I did a preemptive flake and texted her yesterday:

Me: Hey, I'm going to have cancel for tomorrow evening. I have dinner with a friend. She asked me to come help her with something afterward and I can't turn her down.

Her: Oh, okay. That's cool.

Her: (a minute later) One question though, why can't you turn her down?

This was yesterday afternoon and I didn't respond. Last night, she called me. I didn't pick up. This morning again, she called me and I still didn't pick up. I know her hamster is spinning like crazy and all she wants from me is just an answer or conclusion of sorts. I'd rather her mind continue to spin and try to make up reasons or stories in her head than give her an answer.

Do I keep ignoring her or do I respond to her? If so, what should I respond with? Thanks.

 

[El Payaso]

Anyone?

 

[VikingKing]

How long have you been dating? Do you actually have another date? How old is she, how old are you?

 

[bukowski_merit]

I personally do not do preemptive flaking on girls that may flake. Essentially because I'd rather them flake instead of imagining it...

I can't tell you the # of times that I thought a woman was going to flake, and then she came through. Instead of preemptively flaking - if I have some kind of doubt. I'll ask something about the night coming up. My go to is:

"I'm right by the liquor store, so I'm going to stop and get something now for tonight. Any requests?"

(90% of the time I'm sitting at home when I send this; my goal is to make sure it's still on for the night. MOST women who are planning to flake won't let a guy buy alcohol for the night if they aren't going to show up. I've had women say "oh, I'm not sure if I can make it tonight." and I've had women make actual requests, but for the most part - they just say they'll drink whatever... That's what I'm looking for. The faster she responds - the better.)

As for your specific example - It's hard to suggest a best route.

Maybe just moving on?

Or you can call her (much better than texting since this is an "issue" and women like to stick to issues through text whereas you can jedi mind trick em on the phone). Don't really give her answers to things. Be playful, be fun, be the things that probably attracted her in the first place. Then suggest another meet up...

Although from the sound of things - she may still flake on you. Especially since you've engaged in what now amounts to power games with her. Women know how to play these games good too. So... Expect a sh!t storm of sh!t tests.... at the least.

 

[sylvester the cat]

Although from the sound of things - she may still flake on you. Especially since you've engaged in what now amounts to power games with her. Women know how to play these games good too. So... Expect a sh!t storm of sh!t tests.... at the least.

Yup.

 

[BraddH]

Spinning? Are you sure? In that situation, I would just want an answer for whether I should move on or no.

 

[VikingKing]

Quote:
Originally Posted by bukowski_merit

Although from the sound of things - she may still flake on you. Especially since you've engaged in what now amounts to power games with her. Women know how to play these games good too. So... Expect a sh!t storm of sh!t tests.... at the least.

Yup.




I third this.

 

[Dgwizdal]

Do nothing and if she presses: short, indirect answers....

THIS IS SURELY TO FOLLOW AND YOU WILL BE IN CONTROL...

 

[El Payaso]

I personally do not do preemptive flaking on girls that may flake. Essentially because I'd rather them flake instead of imagining it...

I can't tell you the # of times that I thought a woman was going to flake, and then she came through. Instead of preemptively flaking - if I have some kind of doubt. I'll ask something about the night coming up. My go to is:

"I'm right by the liquor store, so I'm going to stop and get something now for tonight. Any requests?"

(90% of the time I'm sitting at home when I send this; my goal is to make sure it's still on for the night. MOST women who are planning to flake won't let a guy buy alcohol for the night if they aren't going to show up. I've had women say "oh, I'm not sure if I can make it tonight." and I've had women make actual requests, but for the most part - they just say they'll drink whatever... That's what I'm looking for. The faster she responds - the better.)

As for your specific example - It's hard to suggest a best route.

Maybe just moving on?

Or you can call her (much better than texting since this is an "issue" and women like to stick to issues through text whereas you can jedi mind trick em on the phone). Don't really give her answers to things. Be playful, be fun, be the things that probably attracted her in the first place. Then suggest another meet up...

Although from the sound of things - she may still flake on you. Especially since you've engaged in what now amounts to power games with her. Women know how to play these games good too. So... Expect a sh!t storm of sh!t tests.... at the least.

Yes, I need massive anti sh!t storm armor which is why I have come to you guys. The truth is, I am actually going on a date with another woman. I only said vaguely that she was a friend for obvious reasons. This woman has never flaked on me so I didn't see any reason to waste my time on the potential flake which was why I did the pre-emptive flake.

Anyway, I just got another missed call from flaky girl. I really don't want to give her mind any satisfaction or rest. When she flaked on me, last week, she didn't answer my call or respond to my texts until many days later. I know she will have a boat load of questions for me if I ever call her back and I don't think I'm ready for that.

 

[El Payaso]

How long have you been dating? Do you actually have another date? How old is she, how old are you?

We've been seeing each other for a few months. I do have another date. It's with another woman and her interest level in me is very high. The flaky girl is 20 and I'm in my mid 20's. I only told the flaky girl that my date was a "friend" for obvious reasons.

I did it partly to start the breakup process anyway. I've been pulling away my attention recently and now I'm hinting at other women to spike get curiosity and then I was thinking I would LJBF her. She will either beg or she won't and I don't care. What do you think or should I take a different route?

At the very least, getting a bang from her would be nice.