Her ex is sneaking back in the picture...

[KillingTime]

Here's the deal, I met a great girl a while back, things are good, she shows a ton of interest in me etc. Definately seems to be going in a long-term type of thing.
However, this guy that she went out with a few years back suddenly looked her up and they have been talking. This guy is scum, some deadbeat with no job just looking to get ass wherever he can. They had a few "flings" years ago, one time while she had a b/f.

She claims she's changed a lot since then, to her credit she is a pretty decent girl, rarely goes out, never stays out late, has morals etc.
But I know in the past she always got carried away in the flirting, and I know she's been talking to this dude a lot on the phone and online (Despite that she gives me hell if I even talk to any other girl, very very jealous and a hypocrit IMO)

Guys am I right or wrong to be uncomfortable here? Should I call her out on it, or just let it go? That I know of she's just talking to the guy a lot, but I gotta admit it's bothering the hell out of me. Once a cheater always a cheater? Not to mention if this were the other way around she would be *****ing like no tomorrow.

What do I do? I don't want to be telling her who she can and can't talk to, that's not a relationship I wanna be in. Part of me tells me, ok she hasn't done anything wrong, the relationship is great, just let it be, if you DO find out she did something then you can let her go. The other part of me says even if there's only a 1% chance of me being cheated on, I don't want to take that risk and be played for a fool, pride is on the line.
Don't want to ditch her if it's just my whiny ass being paranoid though.
Should I drop it or drop her?

 

[blinkwatt]

How often does she talk to him on the phone? You have a "right" to be worried but don't trip. Your pride isn't on the line,if she cheats and you know and you stay around then it is on the line.

 

[paraguayandj]

erase him out of the picture with photoshop or just dump her cause it seems like you are just a comeback from her last relationship

 

[KillingTime]

Pretty sure she talks to him almost daily in one way or another (phone, texts, aim).
Caught a few messages they left each other on one of those internet blog things. Pretty funny, she hadn't even told me she was talking to him on there, yet one time when one of my ex g/f's got one of those blogs and she found out she was like "OMG, are you going to start talking to her again?!?! OMG OMG!!" all flipping out.

I have ZERO evidence that she's doing anything with the guy, so trying to just be calm & cool about it. What really gets to me is what I mentioned above, omg if she found out that I had been chatting with that ex g/f of mine... she would have thrown the biggest fit in the history of mankind, and her being a hypocrit like that really, really pisses me off.

I gotta be straight up, call me insecure but I flat out don't like the idea of my g/f talking to a guy that she's hooked up with in the past.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Are you in a relationship with this girl or not? If not, stop acting as if you were.

 

[KillingTime]

LOL of course, she is my girlfriend (who has brought up engagement), why else would I care?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

LOL of course, she is my girlfriend (who has brought up engagement), why else would I care?

So have you guys agreed to get married or just talked about it. If it's the former, she's not that into you if she's still chatting it up with her ex. If it's the latter she's not that into you because she hasn't committed and is still chatting it up with her ex. So, why do you care?

 

[Mr_knowit_all]

So have you guys agreed to get married or just talked about it. If it's the former, she's not that into you if she's still chatting it up with her ex. If it's the latter she's not that into you because she hasn't committed and is still chatting it up with her ex. So, why do you care?

I don't always agree with francisco, but he's right about this. I've learned that if a woman is "into you" she won't be doing things like that. So if I were you, I would just back off a bit and see if she gets the hint.

 

[Nighthawk]

This guy is scum, some deadbeat with no job just looking to get ass wherever he can.

You say that like it's a bad thing. Or more importantly, an unattractive thing.

 

[Ace_McGregor]

A chick that was really into you wouldn't risk the relationship by talking to an ex. Not to mention it is disrespectful toward you. Talk to one of you ex's and see how she reacts.