"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Her ex BF

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Don Juan
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Hello,

My life turned to a better way, got rid of my ex gf.

So I started something with a girl I know for 5 years...we never had anything, and lost contact in the last 2 years, cause we both got in relationships.

Last week we went out, then she came to my place, we got drunk, she slept over, and we maked out, she said she doesn't want to have sex on the first date, I respected that and didn't force it.

2 days later she texted me.... She said that she still has feelings for her ex bf (they went apart a month ago) and that if he would call her back she would go cause she is naive. I said that she has to choose between me and him. She said that she needs time. And that she doesn't want a relationship and that she likes to be just "****" friends. I asked her out again and she said we can go but just as friends. I didn't reply on that anymore.

I have a feeling i'm just a guy she has so she can forget her ex, and that she is gonna jump from me to him all the time. What should my next step be?

P.S. I really really like her. She is just unclear what she wants right now, and I know she likes me. Also i'm the 3rd guy in her life that she kissed. (that's what she said)
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Don Juan
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1) Ok i'm not obsessed with her, I just wanted to let you know I like her, I know her for 6 years, we get along really good + she's hot.
2) Ultimatum is a bad idea okay
3) She ain't my ex. I was talking about her wanting her ex back....
4) She told me she doesn't want to have sex on the first date... I didn't even try anything...thought I would let her know i'm not the type of guy who bangs and goes away...
5) No contact is the best option, she always crawls back and says she misses me...
6) Can't say, we talk about sex a lot, she tells me what she likes in bed and such... Maybe we could **** that night i dont know...She grabed my D**K like 10 time and was checking if I have a boner, and made flirty comments, like I said, we probably could have sex...
 

yungballa

Senior Don Juan
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man ima put it to you simply like this.

you and this girl probably ain't gonna go too far. why? because she doesn't like you enough.

If a girl LIKED you enough she wouldn't have to think about the decision between you and her ex. she'd go straight to you without hesitation. but she doesn't feel that much attraction for you. she's probably not even fully interested; just keeping you around as a rebound/back up which a lot of women do. I didn't even have to read this full thread to know the solution here. by the time you said she had to pick between you and her ex, thats when i knew.

just think about it. if she liked you ENOUGH, there is no decision between you and her ex. she'd go straight to you.

if you had showed her a better time than her ex, (or maybe she just didn't have enough initial attraction in you) then she wouldn't have to decide.

let's just face it. she doesn't like you enough and it probably won't go far even if you do score her.
 

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She is attached to her ex.... She is lost...she told me a lot of stuff when she was drunk.. I don't know man...
Maybe I didn't describe enough details...
It wasnt really choosing...she is naive...he can hit her...he can be a total ******* and she would still go back

Damn...
You're right this aint going anywhere... the B**** is ****ed up...
 

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Don Juan
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This is a woman who CLEARLY wants your c0ck! Women grab your d!ck when they want it inside them! Unless she escalates beyond just grabbing, it is because she *NEEDS YOU* to escalate to sex, otherwise she can/will be perceived as a slvt!!!
Damn... Should have F***ed her then...
She's coming home next friday. I allready arranged to see her. Let's see what happens then. :)
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Don Juan
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Hey, if there's anyone still here..
Im in a making out relationship with her... kind of a friendzone where we kiss... she makes out with, get back together with her ex...and then the story repeats...
The distance is killing us. She says shes lonely and because her (now) ex bf is her roomate she always gets back with him...

Im kind of sick of this bull****, but then again making out once a month is okay too :D
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
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Hey, if there's anyone still here..
Im in a making out relationship with her... kind of a friendzone where we kiss... she makes out with, get back together with her ex...and then the story repeats...
The distance is killing us. She says shes lonely and because her (now) ex bf is her roomate she always gets back with him...

Im kind of sick of this bull****, but then again making out once a month is okay too :D
She's bouncing back and forth. Once a month is not enough. She should be a very low priority plate.
 

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Don Juan
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She's bouncing back and forth. Once a month is not enough. She should be a very low priority plate.
True! Well its cool she's around...not really crying all day cause she is not here...
She got back with her ex 3days ago...didnt reply to my text, doesnt even look at my snapchat story posts... probably on total ignore mode...
 
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