Her body language threw me off

[bunjy]

Took this stunning broad out lastnite, really really hot (probably the hottest chick Ive taken out). Had previously established rapport (via txt, phone call) and setting was good (quiet bar).

Within 30 mins I was using plenty of C+F and she was laughin and giggling at practically everything I said. Also she was giving me a decent bit of eye contact. I was obviously gonna escalate using KINO etc. Then we moved tables to a nicer one and she sat closer to me BUT I noticed her body language wasnt particicularly receptive (she was sitting alongside me but facing forward with her arm and legs crossed). She pretty much remained in this position for the rest of the night (two hours), she did unfold her arms and play with her long necklace a fair bit and continued to laugh at almost everything I said.

Anyway this totally threw me off, am used to gaming chicks and theyre fairly receptive and im good at reading body language/picking up on signals. So I had studpidly got it into my mind that she wasnt interested and began to wind my game down and plan to leave. Anyway we left shortly and she gave me a lift home, I left without going for a kiss despite the fact she was smiling loads before I got out the car.

I might of ****ed it up by assuming she wasnt interested based upon her body language (despite the fact she was very giggly and smiley throughout the night, also she txted me today saying the usual).

So what you reckon, me overanalysing ****ed it up right??

 

[londonzen]

didnt wanna give of how much she was feeling you

 

[Cinamon]

Some women sit like that cause they are more comfortable like that, and maybe she wanted to draw attention to her nice legs. Never finish a date without a kiss, you have to kiss, its like the law of dating.

 

[bunjy]

didnt wanna give of how much she was feeling you

Yeah this seems pretty much like what it was really. Given shes really hot aswell she probably doesnt wanna appear to easy or show too much interest.

I was stupid for taking it the wrong way and not going in for a kiss really, looking back she was absolutely beaming when we parted ways and if I hadnt convinced myself she wasnt interested I would of been all over her.

I feel what your saying about always going for a kiss Cinamon but I disagree that its necessary. Ive gamed many broads who have pulled away from a kiss on first date or only gone for a small peck but on the second date responded really well to a kiss. I dunno I think in a strange way not giving her a kiss on the first date (if shes interested in you) can work better for you (in the sense of shes having to work to get you) aslong as you make clear your attracted to her.

Am gonna set up a second date, take her out, play it cool and go in for an early kiss.

 

[TheBucketOfTruth]

Try not to get too wrapped up in the details. If as a whole things were going well, don't find one "off" thing and let it spoil the night.

Was this a first date? Women get nervous too, especially if they're actually into the guy they're going on a date with, so just keep that in mind. If a woman is shy or doesn't know what to do with her hands, she might just fold her arms to keep them in line and keep her from fidgeting and the like.

Just keep your cool and things should go well on day 2. If you're lucky, your standoffish ending to the date will keep her second guessing herself and wondering what she did wrong or if she looked bad or any number of things. Most women overanalyze more than men, so she's probably ruminating just as much as you are. Since we have studied these things, we will already have a tendency to overanalyze every minute detail of an interaction, but just make sure this is constructive rather than neurotic.

In summary, there's no reason not to proceed as normal.

 

[bunjy]

Try not to get too wrapped up in the details. If as a whole things were going well, don't find one "off" thing and let it spoil the night.

Was this a first date? Women get nervous too, especially if they're actually into the guy they're going on a date with, so just keep that in mind. If a woman is shy or doesn't know what to do with her hands, she might just fold her arms to keep them in line and keep her from fidgeting and the like.

Yeah I think the main problem was me getting too wrapped up in details, I had written off taking it any further half way through the date when cleary this was unecessary. I admit I have a tendency to be neurotic and recently chicks have bailed on me after the first/second date so Ive spent a fair bit of time reassesing my game recently which even lastnite wasnt up to scratch (I was concerned that I was being maybe too funny since she was giggling at everything I said).

Yeah this was a first date and I think your right about her being nervous as she seems like quite a shy broad, also im aware that she knows I have no problems getting girls as a mutual friend we have will of told her this, no doubt this contributed to her perception of me and possibly made her more nervous.

The only concern I have regarding a second date was as I said above I feel that maybe I was using too much funny and not enough ****y. Any tips on balancing this out?? I have no problems making chicks laugh and tend to have a natural charm in this regard however I have problems throwing in a ****y attitude.

Also she made it subtlely obvious lastnite that guys are always chasing her, which given how hot she is I woudl expect. How would I go about continuing to persue her but without coming across like all the other men who do the same to her?? So far Ive played it cool, not contacted her too often (via txt or call) and gave the impression that I have a busy life.

 

[TheBucketOfTruth]

The only concern I have regarding a second date was as I said above I feel that maybe I was using too much funny and not enough ****y. Any tips on balancing this out?? I have no problems making chicks laugh and tend to have a natural charm in this regard however I have problems throwing in a ****y attitude.

Also she made it subtlely obvious lastnite that guys are always chasing her, which given how hot she is I woudl expect. How would I go about continuing to persue her but without coming across like all the other men who do the same to her?? So far Ive played it cool, not contacted her too often (via txt or call) and gave the impression that I have a busy life.

It sounds like you've got her interested, now you just have to open her up a bit. Start out the next date and see if she still sits the same way. This time you'll have to get physical (kino) and get her comfortable with your touch (and hopefully she reciprocates a bit). If you're not too advanced with this, you can plan the 2nd date around having excuses to get close and/or touch her. In any case, you still have to feel 100% comfortable with your every move because women can read you like a book when you're being timid.

Maybe do mini-golf or bowling or something where if she sucks you can get up close and give her some tips (or whatever other thing you may be good at). Is that too cliché? Another idea that may sound lame at first but has potential is doing something like baking cookies at hers or your place. This way you can get messy and lick dough off each others fingers, help her wipe the corners of her mouth, fun stuff like that. You get the idea?

 

[Alle_Gory]

You didn't kiss her? Duuuude.

She must have been really disappointed. You have to show you like her. Touch her, kiss her, compliment her, this is assuming she's nice and receptive to you. If she's a b*tch then you need to break her down first.

Also, if she's not receptive the first time. TRY AGAIN. Don't make the kiss at the end of the night. If you screw it up, that's it. If you do it during, you get more time should you screw it up to do damage control.

 

[bunjy]

It sounds like you've got her interested, now you just have to open her up a bit. Start out the next date and see if she still sits the same way. This time you'll have to get physical (kino) and get her comfortable with your touch (and hopefully she reciprocates a bit).

Thats what im pretty much going to do. Its all systems go now aswell, shes been txting me loads and has agreed to a second date.

However a problem appears to have arisen. Theres a strong possibility I could be a rebound. After asking a mutual friend I discovered that this broad was in a serious 3 year relationship whilst she had been living in London (had bought a house together and eveything). Not too sure of the details on how it ended but it appears it was a nasty bitter breakup with her being hurt and feeling betrayed (I know this for a fact). This was 3 months ago. How should I handle this?? Am I blatantly just gonna be the rebound guy in which case I should be carefull,protect myself and hold back abit (I dont mind being the rebound guy aslong as im getting some action) or should I keep an open mind and just see what happens??

The main problem is really related to the fact that Im rather bored of the game (Ive had my fair share of women and short relationships) and now im getting older 28 am much more inclined towards something more serious than screwing around then parting ways in 3 months time. In short, am looking for LTR material.

 

[TheBucketOfTruth]

Always be careful with your emotions/feelings regardless of the situation. I would say just keep moving forward and stop thinking about all these things. You haven't even kissed this woman yet, so I wouldn't even worry if you're a rebound or not; you're getting a bit ahead of yourself.

Every woman is different. Some may be fine after 3 months while others may take years to get over things. Either way, you should just proceed as normal. You'll find out from her what the deal is whether directly or indirectly. You shouldn't be thinking or worrying about this at all yet.

 

[bunjy]

Always be careful with your emotions/feelings regardless of the situation. I would say just keep moving forward and stop thinking about all these things. You haven't even kissed this woman yet, so I wouldn't even worry if you're a rebound or not; you're getting a bit ahead of yourself.

Every woman is different. Some may be fine after 3 months while others may take years to get over things. Either way, you should just proceed as normal. You'll find out from her what the deal is whether directly or indirectly. You shouldn't be thinking or worrying about this at all yet.

Yep Yep. spot on advice, cheers.

 

[slaog]

Take it date by date. Don't look too far ahead and don't let yourself get too emotionally involved.


Her body language indicated that she was uncomfortable in the situation. It could have been a number of reasons regarding the location and her being nervous on a date. It might also have just ment that she was cold!


She text you next day which is a good sign.

 

[bunjy]

Thought I should give you guys an update and let you know how im getting on with this broad.

Second date was good, was arranged quickly and she made the effort to drop what she had planned to come and see me. Body language was much the same as before but her behaviour was very positive and similar to before (she spend a lot of time giggling, laughing and smiling). Gave her a decent kiss and the end of the night and all went well.

Since then (this was 5 days ago) she has been txting me every day and Ive generally had frequent text conversations (I know this is a bad thing and I generally dont like it myself but im quite good at txt game so I figure as long as im careful its ok). I suggested that we should go out again and she said yes, I suggested a particular night and she said she couldnt do it but did offer a 'possible' alternative (she said 'maybe') which was suppossed to be today. Now heres the problem, at the end of our last date I told her id call her (didnt say when), which I was gonna do today (to sort out tonight). Since our last date though and numerous txt conversations she seems to maybe flaking out on me. I asked her if we was still on (by txt, was gonna call today to sort out details) for today last nite and she hasnt replied. Now I figure either a: she is just playing abit hard to get or not trying to appear to ethusiastic or b: Ive generally screwed it up by too much txting (even though she has always drawn me into a txt conversation) and maybe appeared abit too keen (not hugely though) and shes lost interest, although i dont think i have screwed it up. I get the feeling she does quite like me but wants me to do the chasing and doesnt want to take it too fast.


So what do you guys think?? Should I call her today (even though she hasnt replied to my txt) or shall I just hold back and see if she contacts me??

Im thinking wait until she contacts me then call her and set up details for tonight.

On another note I had this hot broad lastnite (different one) all over me and I am keeping my options open.

 

[slaog]

You said you'd call her so call her. Don't worry about the answer or don't build it up too much. If she doesn't want to date then back off her.


I would suggest that in future don't arrange when to call somebody. Tell her you'll call her sometime. By giving a certain date it shows that its a big deal for you.


Texting can also give off hints about how you think. It tells them how much attention you give them. If you're too enthusiastic when texting it tells her alot. If you're trying to impress with what you say its tells her alot.

 

[bunjy]

You said you'd call her so call her. Don't worry about the answer or don't build it up too much. If she doesn't want to date then back off her.


I would suggest that in future don't arrange when to call somebody. Tell her you'll call her sometime. By giving a certain date it shows that its a big deal for you.


Texting can also give off hints about how you think. It tells them how much attention you give them. If you're too enthusiastic when texting it tells her alot. If you're trying to impress with what you say its tells her alot.

Sorry if I was confusing but I did what you said in regard to calling her, I just told her Id call her sometime (didnt tell her when but I thought to myself Id call her on Sunday).

The point is that since she was all 'maybe' about the possible date tonight and now that after asking her directly (lastnite via txt) she hasnt replied im not so sure calling her would be a good idea (at least until she contacts me). I dont really wanna be calling her since shes apparently ignoring me (which shes not done before).

What you say about txting is spot on aswell, its a minefield txting and can quite often make or break your chances.

 

[bunjy]

Right guys, its now 5pm and she hasnt contacted me. I would think that any chance of us going out tonight has gone really. Should I contac her or should I just next her?? It seems as if shes not interested in meeting me and dont really wanna waste any more time.

 

[Lion]

Next her, 99% chance she would have responded by now if she was worth knowing

 

[bunjy]

Next her, 99% chance she would have responded by now if she was worth knowing

Yeah thats what im thinking. I ended up giving in and txting her (nothing serious just friendly chat). Bad move I know. She said she was out with her brother and said i could come and meet them if i wanted to, i said no because I was busy. Anyway we had a few txt convos and that was it. I think I may have F***ked up by txting her asking her to meet me and generally being abit pushy towards her meeting me at some point tonight.

Im thinking shes lost interest and nexting her is the only option now. She does seem responsive in txt but clearly today she was not gonna meet me and if it was not for me txting her she probably wouldnt have contacted me. I still aint called her though.

Am thinking I may just ignore her for a few days then call her out the blue and ask if she wants to meet (last shot). What you lot think?? As far as i can tell ive not really screwed it up or done anything badly, maybe I am being too pushy arranging for us to meet up and Ive made it too obvious I like her. Is she just stringing me along and im wasting my time or is she testing me or playing hard to get??

 

[Joe Stud]

You were putting her feet to sleep (boring her because you didnt make moves). Wait now... and hope she contacts you in the next few days. if so, say "hey, lets get a drink and catch up". do the c & f act again, but for heavens sake grab her! stroke her leg under the table, kiss her ear, ... just make the ho say no.