"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Hemingway's Fav Burger

Willie Naylor

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At least, in my opinion. I've enjoyed cooking since I was 12, and it's certainly come in handy throughout my life. In my experience, women are super attracted to a guy who knows his way around a kitchen. A while back, I was on a date at a girl's house, and she asked me to open the bottle of wine. I had no idea how to. So, I pulled up a YT video to walk me through it.

Not my finest moment.

Anyway, earlier today, I came across Ernest Hemingway's favorite burger recipe. I don't know how many of y'all are foodies, but thought you may like to give it a try one day. This original recipe of Hemingway's was found at the JFK Museum in Boston:


Original-Recipe.jpg
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Scaramouche

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Hi Willie,
No one made Hamberger Patties with that recipe,it would turn out like Hospital Mince...If you must try it,then forget the Spices and Wine, just thicken with Fallaffel Flour,roll in seasoned breadcrumbs.
 

Willie Naylor

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Hi Willie,
No one made Hamberger Patties with that recipe,it would turn out like Hospital Mince...If you must try it,then forget the Spices and Wine, just thicken with Fallaffel Flour,roll in seasoned breadcrumbs.
This is indeed how Hemingway made his favorite burger.

Made one last night, and it's really good. Some of the Spice Island spices have been DCd, so I used soy sauce and some other things instead.

Also, I didn't use India relish.
 

Scaramouche

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Hi Willie,
Glad you enjoyed your Burgers,a Guy who has been cooking since twelve needs no lessons from me,I started in earnest during my late thirties,too late....Seems we come to life with little boxes in our brains that need a key to be opened,the later you leave it the more difficult it is to develop...Tactile and co-ordination skills like,Cooking,Gardening,Dancing will be learnt much more easily and naturally during ones youth...Applies to all things,seems the Wolf Children of India though rescued in late infancy,never learned to walk erect nor speak.If skills are not triggered early enough they will never develop to full potential.
 

Willie Naylor

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Hi Willie,
Glad you enjoyed your Burgers,a Guy who has been cooking since twelve needs no lessons from me,I started in earnest during my late thirties,too late....Seems we come to life with little boxes in our brains that need a key to be opened,the later you leave it the more difficult it is to develop...Tactile and co-ordination skills like,Cooking,Gardening,Dancing will be learnt much more easily and naturally during ones youth...Applies to all things,seems the Wolf Children of India though rescued in late infancy,never learned to walk erect nor speak.If skills are not triggered early enough they will never develop to full potential.
You're spot on. They say it's harder to learn a foreign language, the older you get.

You been in Australia your whole life?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Scaramouche

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Hi Willie,
Yes Languages are a very good example.you actually learn to learn them....Richard Burton co-discoverer of the Niles Source had twenty nine,At our own Australian National University there was by repute a linguist who had close to a hundred!
I was born in a classically thatched village called Little Gaddesdon, in England,A War evacuee....Dad was away for six years the bombing in Plymouth was severe and it was best for Mum to enter into service for wealthy Folk who were semi retired there.
 
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