help with working things out with my ex.

[Dgwizdal]

thanks for this, and I get what you're saying too.. there is a lot more to all this than I would like to get into right now, but I do understand.

like i said before, our biggest issue was spending way too much time together (which was basically 24/7, after living & working together for 5 years) we never fought or had issues @ all and got along great until the past year.

she is however, very immature and cupcake-ish too, (meaning she will start to cry within seconds of getting upset). just very difficult to just walk away from her but i get it.

probably my only choice @ this point, despite her trying to convince me she wants to work things out without giving "it" up just yet.

sigh.

Keep rationalizing all you want between what she says and what you want to believe but it isn't true. Everything you haven't mentioned is irrelevant. The past does not matter because she is not attracted to you NOW. Your only move is in my post from yesterday - Do it, stick to it, or you'll be going in miserable circles forever. Everything you've done thus far has got you nowhere... Break the mold and be the f*ckin man.

 

[killakxx27]

So I totally backed off.. didn't really cut things off with her but I initiated no texts or meet ups at all, made her wait for hours before I replied to her messages, and sometimes didn't all, she would go nuts and send me like 6 or 7 additional messages until I reply lol. Very flirty as well.

Any who, I have vacation at the end of the month and I talked about going to colorado by nyself to go "hiking" (*wink*) and she kept hinting she wanted to go somewhere together I kept ignoring it but then she sent me info on a deal to cancun all inclusive for a few nights...

So we're going lol now what?

 

[killakxx27]

We're splittin it btw

 

[Dgwizdal]

You're an idiot and will be back here in 2 months asking what now after she's bored of you again.

You're just a little b*tch she uses for validation and fun. Once you give in even the slightest she'll be gone. You're blind to it because she's on your nuts now but Her interest will be back to nothing soon.

You didn't even go no contact - it's been 5 days.

You didn't make her work for you at all. As far as a relationship goes - you're f*cked for good now. She knows for sure your a phaggot with no back bone who she can manipulate into vacations by throwing a little sh*t fit. Trust me - she's not interested or attracted to you. She just wants to know your still there when she wants. Congrats and thanks for wasting everyone's time.

 

[killakxx27]

Lol dam dude, I broke up with this girl last year , I did no contact for like 3 months & and dated another girl too, dafuq man?

 

[Dgwizdal]

Lol dam dude, I broke up with this girl last year , I did no contact for like 3 months & and dated another girl too, dafuq man?

And you haven't f*cked her, you want to get back together with her, and she's playin you like a fiddle.


Please list the advice you took and used from my post and others.....


You didn't do sh*t.

I SPENT TIME TRYIN TO HELP YOU OUT THINKIN YOU WERE ACTUALLY GANA BE ONE OF THE GUYS THAT GRABS HIS NUTS AND MANS UP.


You wanted to get back together with her or get over her. Going on a vacation with her a week after you came here looking for advice is not going to help you accomplish either. It is going to result in you turning into a bigger phaggot when her interest dies again and you're left dumbfounded. She's in control - your wrapped around her finger and she knows it.

You gave in and agreed to go on a f*cking vacation with her after she played a little text game with you LMAO. I'm sure that during this last week she has had racing thoughts about how her future would be like without you, plenty of time to miss you, and you in turn have turned into the attractive guy she would never think of leaving...

You're f*ckin up kid.

You just don't get it - that's why you came here for advice - you're supposed to take it and do it bc the guys here have been there before - you didn't do a f*ckin thing and now you're killing your chances at a speedy recovery and don't even know it.


You're safe to her: a comfortable, emotionally available, and forgiving safety netting phaggot she wants to keep around for sh*ts and giggles. This is all your vacation will be - have fun granite she doesn't flake. :crackup:


Here's a rookie's page to help you figure out your delusions.
http://backwithex.com/make-your-ex-want-you-back.php


Tough love kid - I put time and effort into helping you out and you come back with this vacation F*CKERY. You're supposed to be going against your gut and you didn't listen to a damn thing. GOOD LUCK.

 

[Don_Dom]

General advice given here is to reward good behavior not try to buy it. Guys are told not to even buy dinner till sex has been had or, at least, major headway has been made. And here you are booking a trip out of the country with her? I realize you are splitting it, but that's not the point.

The guy above is being charitable, IMO. Guaranteed, at some point in time AFTER the trio is booked, paid for, not cancellable but BEFORE you get on the plane some sh1t will happen. A fight. She will flake. Something. And if I'm wrong about that some sh1t will happen on the trip. Guaranteed.

You are jumping thru little hoops for a woman you've already been with for six years who won't have sex with you. There's something very wrong with that picture, you are just in that deluded state that we all get in, but you know enough in your gut to post here about it. I have a friend who did this stuff serially for 15 years till he finally got married. I watched him eat more trips, weekend getaways, wind up with more puppies that were supposed to be gifts.....you name it....even had one move in his place for 3 months because she got kicked out of her old place...never had sex with him but racked up thousands on his delivery food accounts.. you name it..because he was trying to win over a situation that was barely even for real to begin with.

Your woman sounds confused. And you sound like you are trying to be captain save a Ho. You can't save them if they don't want to be saved, bro. She can say anything...none of it matters....6 years and she won't have sex with you is your red flag, right there.

We aren't trying to be harsh. We are trying to slap you with some reality so you get out of your own way. We've all been there and we know firsthand that guys are notorious for deluding themselves at times like these because they want a particular outcome.

You need to get a handle on this situation pronto, just for your own sake. For the love of god, do not book a trip with her until you do.