Help with this girl!

[xenten]

I met this girl a few weeks ago. My friend introduced us. We talked for a few hours and went to a movie. We hit it off pretty good, made her, well call her Sam, laugh and all that good stuff. We made out alittle at the movie so that was a sign I was doing well. I tried to call Sam a few times during that week, but she didn't answer her phone. About a week after the movie Sam came over to my house and we had alittle fun, nothing serious. Now, I'm tryin to get in touch with Sam but she never answers her phone. Sam called me last night and said we were gonna hang out tonight, Sam never called me back so we didn't. I talked to Sams friend tonight and she told me that Sam likes me, she just doesn't want to be in a relationship, I'm fine with that. She says I'm too shy and seem like the kind of person that would get emotionally attached and really want to be with her, not just have fun, no strings attatched. I am alittle shy, but I didn't think I ever showed it around her, I was always talking around her. I don't know what to say to her to tell her I'm not like that. I don't get emotionally attached. Should I just say to her, "You probably think I'm shy, and would get emotionally attatched, and my moods change from wild to mellow from time to time." and some other stuff. Or what should I tell her?

Please help me out.
Thanks,
Mooney

 

[Fender]

Well, as a general rule of thumb, I would...

NEVER tell a girl about my feeelings or what I'm like.

Let her find out for herself. And besides, people respond better to actions than to words.

It sounds like you should open yourself up a little. Flirt more and send some playful signals like teasing and touching and...well...u'know

Just have fun! And don't do the relation-shippy things like having dinner or getting her gifts. IN fact, watching a movie might be on the borderline of reationshippy, but thats up to you.

Best of luck!

-peace-

 

[Craig Reeves]

It seems that you may have been a little needy with her after your first date.

You should have waited about a week before you called her again.

 

[xenten]

Craig Reeves: She didn't call it a date when we went to the movie, but I waited about 5 days or so to call her.

Fender: How do I make her find out for herself? Go to a party? I was thinkin about takin her to the state park for a hike, or going to the drag strip. Do those sound non relationshippy?

I called her tonight but she didn't answer, she never does, I didn't leave a message. Should I just stop by her house if she doesn't call me back? It's not even a minute away from me.

I have been thinking about what I should have done that I didn't do when I went over to her house, I've learned from my mistakes, hopefully.

Thanks,
Mooney

 

[Fender]

Well, the best way for someone to realize you are fun and emotionally un-attached is to be ****y and funny. Have fun with her! Treat her like "a bratty little sister" as DYD would say. To show that you're not needy, you really just have to treat her like one of your buddies (but add in an occasional dash of kino of course )

You can take her wherever you want actually, cause its not WHAT you do, its how you do it. But obviously, it's easier to be "fun" in a go kart rink as opposed to a romantic dinner with candles everywhere.

Luck!
:cheer:

 

[Stereo]

Confront her on her flakiness and while doing this slip in keys that you are non-needy and dont want a relationship.

ie:

I was surprised you said you were coming over and then you flaked, I don't have time in my life for flakes, when you say you are going to do something, do it. If I were looking for a relationship I might say see ya, but you're lucky that I dont want anything serious, heck I'm only XX years old, I have years before I have to worry about any of that bull. Yeah so anyways I wanted to tell you that I don't accept flakes in my life, so if you're not a flake cool, we can hang out... are you a flake?

--

She will say, "no no, blah blah"... then just laugh and say, ok cool, "I'm going shopping tomorrow, you can come along if you want."

 

[xenten]

Steroe: Thanks for the help but I didn't go that way, couldn't get it worked out in my head how to say it. She says the reason she didn't call me back was that she was in Sylacauga (spelling?)

How I stand with her:
I saw her tonight, she says she's got a girl friend now, been 2 days, but she say's she isn't a lesbian . We were at a friends house, nothing happened there. I was planning to take her to my house to see if anything would arise, but on the way home it turns out she was 30 minutes late for being home. The ride there I tried to seduce her, touching her leg and such, kept saying how she's crazy and stuff. Nothing arised from this, but just a kiss. I told her me her and her girl friend could have a 3 some, but she objected I think.

I told her to call me tomorrow so we could hang out, and I'm going to try to seduce her. I'm going to take her to shoot my potato gun.

Can anyone give me advice as to what to do so we can have some "fun"? Or is what I'm doing all that I can do?

Thanks for all the help,
Mooney