Help. Weird situation.

[ositosucio]

Long story short:

Starting in may I started talking this girl who at
The time was living with her boyfriend, a beta super afc
Guy who would writer her very cringe worthy bad poems
On Facebook, give her flowers etc etc. the definition of a
Beta boy.

After a few weeks she starts cheating on him with me
And in another 2 weeks she leaves him. Moves out to her
Own apartment and starts dating me.

While she is paying rent at her place she never
Actually sleeps there. We had been living together
For 5 months. She took me to meet her family
In her country and we have traveled to other countries.

I have blown her mind in bed and completely dominated
Her in every aspect. I'm not trying to brag but I truly
Showed her what an alpha male is. In looks and confidence
I'm light years ahead of her ex. I'm also pretty
Successful and have basically no need to work
Though I do.

Here is the thing. I could have overplayed the alphaness
A bit. She has been very sweet to me all these months
And even though I felt like opening up
To her more I didn't. I gave her about 20%
Of the compliments she gave me. Acted aloof a lot
And kept busy. Never cheated. I saw potential
For a lot more in the near future but taking into
Consideration what she did to her beta ex I withheld
A lot of my feelings.

Well a week ago she talks to me about space
And being alone for a while. She said she felt she wasn't
Important to me and even thought I could have been cheating.

She said I needed to be more open with my feelings.

Truth is I was getting there. I cared about her
But seeing what happened to her ex and also the fact
That I had just come out of a 7 year marriage really made
Me keep a lot of my emotions inside.

She told me she felt insecure about me. She left.
Picked up her things and left. There were a few tears
From both of us.

Well today I found out what already suspected. She went back to
That poor soul that placed her in a pedestal
And treated her like a princess. I didn't. I was getting there
But needed more time.

I kind of knee this was going to happen when 2 weeks
Ago she tells me her ex removed her from fb because
He had somebody else.

This poor clown even sent a poem to one of her friends
Right after she dumped him and started living with me.

My question is:

How do we reverse all this situation? I like her a lot
And I don't think she is a slut, just a very insecure, confused
Girl. My gut feeling tells me they won't last.

How can this poor guy take her back with a straight face???

Ideas???

 

[user name]

Long story short:

Starting in may I started talking this girl who at
The time was living with her boyfriend, a beta super afc
Guy who would writer her very cringe worthy bad poems
On Facebook, give her flowers etc etc. the definition of a
Beta boy.

After a few weeks she starts cheating on him with me
And in another 2 weeks she leaves him. Moves out to her
Own apartment and starts dating me.

While she is paying rent at her place she never
Actually sleeps there. We had been living together
For 5 months. She took me to meet her family
In her country and we have traveled to other countries.

I have blown her mind in bed and completely dominated
Her in every aspect. I'm not trying to brag but I truly
Showed her what an alpha male is. In looks and confidence
I'm light years ahead of her ex. I'm also pretty
Successful and have basically no need to work
Though I do.

Here is the thing. I could have overplayed the alphaness
A bit. She has been very sweet to me all these months
And even though I felt like opening up
To her more I didn't. I gave her about 20%
Of the compliments she gave me. Acted aloof a lot
And kept busy. Never cheated. I saw potential
For a lot more in the near future but taking into
Consideration what she did to her beta ex I withheld
A lot of my feelings.

Well a week ago she talks to me about space
And being alone for a while. She said she felt she wasn't
Important to me and even thought I could have been cheating.

She said I needed to be more open with my feelings.

Truth is I was getting there. I cared about her
But seeing what happened to her ex and also the fact
That I had just come out of a 7 year marriage really made
Me keep a lot of my emotions inside.

She told me she felt insecure about me. She left.
Picked up her things and left. There were a few tears
From both of us.

Well today I found out what already suspected. She went back to
That poor soul that placed her in a pedestal
And treated her like a princess. I didn't. I was getting there
But needed more time.

I kind of knee this was going to happen when 2 weeks
Ago she tells me her ex removed her from fb because
He had somebody else.

This poor clown even sent a poem to one of her friends
Right after she dumped him and started living with me.

My question is:

How do we reverse all this situation? I like her a lot
And I don't think she is a slut, just a very insecure, confused
Girl. My gut feeling tells me they won't last.

How can this poor guy take her back with a straight face???

Ideas???

:crackup:

 

[adam225]

This thread has made my day.... One of the biggest and dumbest contradictions I've ever read. He got what he deserved....

 

[iamnobody]

I see user name is useless as usual.

OP, my guess is your problem was calibration: pushed too much with macho stuff and did not build enough rapport, so you're probably not the alpha you think you are. Work on your inner game first.

When she told you to open up she actually sh1t tested you for congruency.

You are keen on thinking she's not a slut, just very insecure. My friend, insecurity and validation seeking are the ingredients that turn a chick into a slut.

Have you considered that perhaps she hooked up with her ex before giving you the talk? I think you should, looks like that's her modus operandi.

Just remember exes are exes for a reason. You'll be better off starting fresh with somebody else. And this time calibrate.

 

[happyDJ]

You should have been more hot and cold. Alternating more.
You don't need to be clingy and needy, and write her poems, and have long conversations about how much you're soulmates, just do stuff once in a while that shows her she's special. 5 months is a lot, you should have given her something more. Here's your problem:
http://www.manualformen.net/chapter3-1
"Was the man subdued?"
Not at all -> End of relationship.
Completely -> That's her ex.

There's no hope now. Move on. You won't have trouble finding someone much better, that likes you much more, that you like much more.

Hot and cold...

And of course, this: http://therationalmale.com/2012/09/14/amused-mastery/

 

[ositosucio]

I understand everything posted. Thanks.

I could move on but I feel is not too late.

He was dumped for a reason. And I feel she
Still cares about me. She felt I was never too
Available and panicked once she found out the other guy
Was dating again.

I'd like her to realize her mistake and return.
I would bring down the alpha **** a lot this time.

I just didn't have enough time to start bringing down
My defenses.

 

[ositosucio]

This thread has made my day.... One of the biggest and dumbest contradictions I've ever read. He got what he deserved....

Care to explain?

 

[adam225]

It's like a love story gone wrong.

The bottom line is - you shouldn't be fvcking around with someone else's girl. Her leaving you to get back with him shows how "alpha" you really are. How he was with her, and whether or not he is an "afc" or not doesn't give you the right to screw him over. Seriously, I hope you cried like a little girl, and I hope it does hurt. Go find your own women. I know of two men that have taken their lives over this sh1t. I just can't sympathise with you.

People are on this forum to help one on other, not sh1t on each other. If men looked out for each other more and stopped acting so desperate with women the whole dating game would be so much easier.

 

[VladPatton]

This is exactly why you leave girls with bf's the hell alone and move on. You are now in HIS shoes when she ran off with you. Basically it's your turn now. Sucks, doesn't it? Now you know how that poor sap felt. You should of expected this behavior from her and anticipated it, actually.
There are numerous posts here that tell of girls that cheated will only end up cheating on you, it's a classic text book case. And the crazy part is that the AFC still ended up getting the girl in the end! You could of been perfect in all your actions, but he truth is that her ex was simply on the back burner the whole time. Once again, classic behavior.

Your best bet is to leave the situation alone. You had yor fun, now just move on.

 

[ositosucio]

This is exactly why you leave girls with bf's the hell alone and move on. You are now in HIS shoes when she ran off with you. Basically it's your turn now. Sucks, doesn't it? Now you know how that poor sap felt. You should of expected this behavior from her and anticipated it, actually.
There are numerous posts here that tell of girls that cheated will only end up cheating on you, it's a classic text book case. And the crazy part is that the AFC still ended up getting the girl in the end! You could of been perfect in all your actions, but he truth is that her ex was simply on the back burner the whole time. Once again, classic behavior.

Your best bet is to leave the situation alone. You had yor fun, now just move on.

I only knew about the bf after we had started dating.

I'm hurting. Yes. But the fact is she wasnt happy with him.
And I'm willing to bet she can't be happy now either.

 

[user name]

I see user name is useless as usual.

OP, my guess is your problem was calibration: pushed too much with macho stuff and did not build enough rapport, so you're probably not the alpha you think you are. Work on your inner game first.

When she told you to open up she actually sh1t tested you for congruency.

You are keen on thinking she's not a slut, just very insecure. My friend, insecurity and validation seeking are the ingredients that turn a chick into a slut.

Have you considered that perhaps she hooked up with her ex before giving you the talk? I think you should, looks like that's her modus operandi.

Just remember exes are exes for a reason. You'll be better off starting fresh with somebody else. And this time calibrate.

Don't confuse the man with your lame theories.

All he needs to know is:

Girl + Boyfriend = Trouble. Stay away.

 

[ositosucio]

I can let her go knowing that her thing with her ex
Won't last but honestly, I did care about her.

She is not in love with him. Can't be after
All the things she did. I wish I had shown her
More rapport/love but I usually don't open up
That fast.

 

[happyDJ]

I can let her go knowing that her thing with her ex
Won't last but honestly, I did care about her.

She is not in love with him. Can't be after
All the things she did. I wish I had shown her
More rapport/love but I usually don't open up
That fast.

Great. Move on. So many other women. So many. In some months you'll be laughing at this whole story.
Stop crying.
Draw a line on a piece of paper. On one end it's your birth, on the other it's your death. Mark where you are now, look at all the women or all the quality of women you can have, and she how ridiculous it is that you are crying over this one.
I mean it. A pencil and a paper. Draw the fvcking line.

 

[ositosucio]

I understand that.

I'm getting. Ready for the rebound which I'm sure is coming.

My instinct tells me what to do but my emotions
Tell me other wise.

 

[ositosucio]

What would the best way would be here to get her
Back and rectify my mistakes?

 

[ositosucio]

In not crying. I have countless plates but
I can't lie and say I'm ok.

I was starting to care about her.

 

[_sideways_]

If u care so much about this girl.....I feel sorry for u when and if u get married, have kids by the woman, pay the bills, and she disappoints u in some way. Such an emotional investment over such little. Put ur "feelings" in perspective....if ur the sensitive, caring soul type, go volunteer as a big brother to some kid in need and release that type of energy. Women are cut throat creatures. That's it I'm done.

 

[adam225]

In not crying. I have countless plates but
I can't lie and say I'm ok.

BS @ countless plates :crackup:

I hope it hurts. Taste of your own medicine.

 

[user name]

In not crying. I have countless plates but
I can't lie and say I'm ok.

I was starting to care about her.

This is the only mistake that needs rectifying.

Not to say that you shouldn't care for people, but there's 'caring' for people and there's looking out for your own interests. Your case falls in the latter I think.

Next her. For two reasons:

1) Your sanity
2) If she wants you then she will come to this conclusion by herself and not by any PUA tactics or manipulation (even though 'nexting' is a tactic and a form of manipulation. lol).

 

[jay07]

He brags about shwooping a chick with a boyfriend then gets upset when she does the same thing to him..

Shes a cheating ho. She will never change. Should have got rid of her after a few weeks to teach her a valuable lesson.