FilthyStroll
New Member
- Joined
- Jun 8, 2004
- Messages
- 1
- Reaction score
- 0
- Age
- 53
I need some guidance and this time I will listen !!! Ok I don't want to say who I am but I have been here for a couple years. This is just a new name for hopefully a new begining. I actually read the bible and posts for a couple years. I wrote about a married woman who I thought took a liking to me and wanted me. I of course was told that she was just toying with me to boost her own self esteem. But there were and still are several things that was said that told me she was serious. However the majority of it could be she was playing with me. So most people who posted told me that she was playing with me. But there were several who said that she was serious. So I asked the people who said she was playing with me what told them that and nobody would tell me and some even start calling me names. So of course does anybody even bother listening to people who call you names instead of answer you're question? Well I sure don't and willn't
So here I sit at 30 years old living with my mom working a part time job and now after worrying and being depressed for over a year about this woman I am 340lbs now!!! I have no family to turn to. My Dad hates me and will not talk to me my sister hates me My Moms answer to everything is just push it out of your head. and the rest of my family died. I had 2 friends one cut contact with me because I don't like driving. go figure.. My other one I have to beg to do something with me. Then a semi-friend ran behind my back and told this married womans friend that I was talking about her. He even claimed that he didn't know her. I don't know what it is about me to make people treat me like this.
I am confused this married womans friend tried to bring us back to hanging out again. She said don't you at least want to be friends with her. I told her no thanks I want her sexually or I don't want her at all. Of course that was the end of us talking but I kept trying for friends after all and I thought to myself why do I want to be friends with her. Its not like we could go places and hang out. So I realized that I wanted her to treat me like she did in the past. To boost my ego!!! I never realized that is what I wanted so I guess I am no better than her. I worry about this. But afterall don't the way people make you feel play a part in you liking them?
Is there any hope for me? What can I do to live a normal live with friends and a WOMAN ????? Has anybody been in my position before?
So here I sit at 30 years old living with my mom working a part time job and now after worrying and being depressed for over a year about this woman I am 340lbs now!!! I have no family to turn to. My Dad hates me and will not talk to me my sister hates me My Moms answer to everything is just push it out of your head. and the rest of my family died. I had 2 friends one cut contact with me because I don't like driving. go figure.. My other one I have to beg to do something with me. Then a semi-friend ran behind my back and told this married womans friend that I was talking about her. He even claimed that he didn't know her. I don't know what it is about me to make people treat me like this.
I am confused this married womans friend tried to bring us back to hanging out again. She said don't you at least want to be friends with her. I told her no thanks I want her sexually or I don't want her at all. Of course that was the end of us talking but I kept trying for friends after all and I thought to myself why do I want to be friends with her. Its not like we could go places and hang out. So I realized that I wanted her to treat me like she did in the past. To boost my ego!!! I never realized that is what I wanted so I guess I am no better than her. I worry about this. But afterall don't the way people make you feel play a part in you liking them?
Is there any hope for me? What can I do to live a normal live with friends and a WOMAN ????? Has anybody been in my position before?