"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Help me hook up with my tutor!

rayc591

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So here's the story. I am a wrestling coach, 19 years old, college sophomore. There is this one girl who comes in to tutor my wrestlers every tues/thurs, she's a senior in college. The first time I saw her was about 3/4 months ago but I didn't think anything of it. As time passed I chatted her up here and there but nothing serious, until I thought to myself "damn this girl is actually pretty cute!" So at the district meet I really engaged her in conversation, small talk just to see if she was interested in me. She showed interest and kept the conversation flowing. We exchanged numbers (she gave me hers) and she agreed to tutor me because she is strong in a certain subject that I require assistance in.

I texted her once but she never replied, saying something along the lines of "ugh this homework is so boring." I know that she is very busy because she is in a lot of clubs so I didn't think much of it.

Then I messaged her about studying and set up a date for her to tutor me. She agreed.

We met up at a study hall and she started tutoring me. The entire time I couldn't even pay attention, I was just staring at her eyes and thinking about what I was going to say to get another "Date" with her. After the tutoring I asked her what she does on the weekends and she brought up a park. I was about to say that we should go to the park together sometime, but she ended up inviting me to some sort of event she is going to with this multicultural group, like a picnic sort of thing next saturday.

This type of girl isn't the type to go party or do things of that sort. So I know that I should probably go to the picnic thing. We actually have another tutor session on monday so I will be sure to be dressed nicely and be suave. She is the quiet type, shy and meticulous, socially awkward unless she's comfortable with someone. I can feel it. I feel very confident around her too and I can feel my confident energy when I am around her.

Any comments? Advice? The only thing that makes it weird is the age gap, but my ex was 26 :p
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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El Payaso

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I don't see what the problem or difficulty is. She already seems moderately interested in you, gave you her number, was open to tutoring you and even asking you out. Unless you're still an AFC, play this one cool and you should be home free.
 

Mike32ct

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Does she wear glasses :D ?

Tutor chick sounds hot. Plus you have the wrestling thing going for you.

Shouldn't be too hard. The only thing is to try to stay out of friendzone by using kino on this date. Touch her arm while making a point. Put your hand on her lower back once in a while while walking. Just don't overdo it. Less is more. Just so it's clear to her that it's a date and not a friendly get together.

Nerdy/brainy women are actually more wild behind closed doors because their intelligence gives them quite the imagination.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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JohnChops

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Mike32ct said:
Does she wear glasses :D ?

Tutor chick sounds hot. Plus you have the wrestling thing going for you.

Shouldn't be too hard. The only thing is to try to stay out of friendzone by using kino on this date. Touch her arm while making a point. Put your hand on her lower back once in a while while walking. Just don't overdo it. Less is more. Just so it's clear to her that it's a date and not a friendly get together.

Nerdy/brainy women are actually more wild behind closed doors because their intelligence gives them quite the imagination.
i totally agree with the bold.
 

rayc591

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JohnChops said:
i totally agree with the bold.
She messaged me today saying

Her: fyi, we won't be having our picnic at the reservation until april 5th. but we will be having a field day event at the old IM fields on campus on march 22 if you'd like to come.

She is very cut and dry and not into the childish emojis and such, I replied with this:

Me: That sounds great Sarah. I'll have to check my schedule but I would love to be there.

Her messaging me tells me that she was thinking about how she invited me yesterday for her to message me this morning. Hoping that she'll message again because I really want to talk to her!
 
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