Help me decipher this 3rd date

[bruceartest24]

Been going on a lot of dates recently and happy with that aspect. On my recent third date with this cute girl who is a bit older, she tells me the following:

I'm damaged
I like how we are now
Lets not have any expectations

So I plan my exit and figure it's a friend situation or she not over her ex. She continues to try to see and communicate with me and I tell her..I'm not going to stick around and be your friend that is not my intention. Her response:

That's all I can be now, you shouldn't be interested in me. Lets start off as great friends first....without expectations.

I feel like I'm in the matrix...what does this even mean? I am talking to a few other girls but this one has me like puzzled...any thoughts or advice?

 

[Harry Wilmington]

What it means can be a few things:

1. She's not interested
2. She felt you were already starting to make the decision about wanting her as your girlfriend too soon, and used this as a way to make sure you slowed down your pace.

Regardless, your response to this was way too serious. When a girl hits you with some B.S. like this, never respond to her seriously. In fact, you should respond to it as if you're wondering why she's bringing this up. Example:

Her: Let's not have any expectations
Me: What expectations did you think I had? We're only on date 3, and I still haven't made any decisions about you
Her: Well.. I Just... I think we should be friends first
Me: Okay - so, does this mean you're paying for your half of this meal then, friend?

And then, when she hits you up later to hang out, hang out with her and don't pay for anything, yet still show her a good time. If it ends up not working out, so what - you have other plates to fall back on. But, you are more likely to have her change her mind if you (a) act like what she's saying isn't as heavy as she's making it out to be, and (b) you continue treating her as if she didn't say this dumb crap, without spending extra money on her.

Real talk: I recently had a friend who was talking to a girl friend of mine, and she kept saying over and over how they weren't going to hook up. So he'd just say "whatever" and kept hanging with her, like what she said was no big deal. So, after they finally hooked up, she was like "just 'cause we're hooking up doesn't mean we're going to be anything serious." His response? "Whatever, I'm cook doing what we're doing now." Long story short: they've been boyfriend/girlfriend for 2 months now, all because he never took what she was saying VERBALLY that seriously, and only followed what her ACTIONS were doing. If this girl is saying "we should only be friends" but is asking you to hang out and is trying to make out with you when she does, WHO GIVES A CRAP WHAT HER MOUTH IS SAYING?

But yeah.. with that said, if she's telling you she's damaged goods, that would be one thing I would NOT ignore, and would leave her alone.

 

[bruceartest24]

What it means can be a few things:

1. She's not interested
2. She felt you were already starting to make the decision about wanting her as your girlfriend too soon, and used this as a way to make sure you slowed down your pace.

Regardless, your response to this was way too serious. When a girl hits you with some B.S. like this, never respond to her seriously. In fact, you should respond to it as if you're wondering why she's bringing this up. Example:

Her: Let's not have any expectations
Me: What expectations did you think I had? We're only on date 3, and I still haven't made any decisions about you
Her: Well.. I Just... I think we should be friends first
Me: Okay - so, does this mean you're paying for your half of this meal then, friend?

And then, when she hits you up later to hang out, hang out with her and don't pay for anything, yet still show her a good time. If it ends up not working out, so what - you have other plates to fall back on. But, you are more likely to have her change her mind if you (a) act like what she's saying isn't as heavy as she's making it out to be, and (b) you continue treating her as if she didn't say this dumb crap, without spending extra money on her.

Real talk: I recently had a friend who was talking to a girl friend of mine, and she kept saying over and over how they weren't going to hook up. So he'd just say "whatever" and kept hanging with her, like what she said was no big deal. So, after they finally hooked up, she was like "just 'cause we're hooking up doesn't mean we're going to be anything serious." His response? "Whatever, I'm cook doing what we're doing now." Long story short: they've been boyfriend/girlfriend for 2 months now, all because he never took what she was saying VERBALLY that seriously, and only followed what her ACTIONS were doing. If this girl is saying "we should only be friends" but is asking you to hang out and is trying to make out with you when she does, WHO GIVES A CRAP WHAT HER MOUTH IS SAYING?

But yeah.. with that said, if she's telling you she's damaged goods, that would be one thing I would NOT ignore, and would leave her alone.

That was great man, didn't think of it like that first. I just wanted to date and not be her bf so when said that it threw me off. Most likely going to stay away...but very helpful and thanks.