help me deal with this AW

[TheNewGuy]

I've been on/off gaming this girl for the past two months. Shes the definition of an AW. I just want to bang her, nothing more.

Two months ago: We click at a party, heavy flirting/kino. I carry her upstairs, but she has a boyfriend.

I ignore her, giving her random attention here and there every week or two.

Just recently: Shows attention but flakes. Heres tonights conversation:

Me: I'm giving you a ride home tomorrow right?
Her: Uhhh I just remembered I'm getting picked up early.
Me: You're such a loser.
Her: Why
Me: You're missing some perfect opportunities here
Her: You can bring me home monday I realize she'll probably flake
Me: How about this, you have a spare hour tomorrow night?
Her: Why?
Me: Its a yes or no question
Her: Yes?
Me: You don't sound very confident about that yes
Her: Because I don't know what this hours for, call me in an hour.

I'm not gonna call her later, maybe tomorrow. Whats your advice?

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

Why are you pushing to pick her up?

Let it go!

 

[TheNewGuy]

Why are you pushing to pick her up?

Let it go!

Because I'd like to put it in her.


"Make the ho say no."

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

Because I'd like to put it in her.


"Make the ho say no."

How many girls are honest and direct?

she'll string you along for as long as you'll let her

move on.

 

[JLW]

I would advise that you just forget her.

If she's an AW, she'll probably IM you back or try to contact you. Ignore her more.

Maybe if you continue to ignore her she'll eventually try to get your attention by hooking up with you.

Extremely unlikely. But that's pretty much your only chance with this chick.

And don't ever count on a relationship with her.




What I'm basically trying to say is, forget her. it's for the best.

 

[KillaCam]

Gaming her for 2 months huh? 2 months wasted.

There is nothing to deal with here, just move on.

 

[WesCottII]

I've been on/off gaming this girl for the past two months. Shes the definition of an AW. I just want to bang her, nothing more.

Two months ago: We click at a party, heavy flirting/kino. I carry her upstairs, but she has a boyfriend.

I ignore her, giving her random attention here and there every week or two.

Just recently: Shows attention but flakes. (If a bird flakes on me....why should I bother chasing? I'm the prize here.) Heres tonights conversation:

Me: I'm giving you a ride home tomorrow right?
Her: Uhhh I just remembered I'm getting picked up early.
Me: You're such a loser.
Her: Why
Me: You're missing some perfect opportunities here ( never quantify yourself)
Her: You can bring me home mondayOh lucky you! You get to do her a favour for nothing in return!! Yes!! I realize she'll probably flake
Me: How about this, you have a spare hour tomorrow night?You should be busy tommorow night
Her: Why?
Me: Its a yes or no question
Her: Yes?
Me: You don't sound very confident about that yes
Her: Because I don't know what this hours for, call me in an hour.

I'm not gonna call her later, maybe tomorrow. Whats your advice?

Replies in bold.

Also, if she's the definition of an AW why are you chasing? A AW, flirts but never gives it up.....

 

[Zerotwoonenine]

she doesnt want to bang u. END OF QUESTION NEXT HER

 

[TheNewGuy]

I hooked up with her last night...

 

[JLW]

So what did you do to manage that?

 

[TheNewGuy]

So what did you do to manage that?

Well I had a few failed attempts, but then I just drove around and talked to her and basically ended up telling her that I really don't want to put up with any bullshiit anymore.

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

good stuff

no more free rides. make her earn em

 

[JLW]

good job man.


I wouldn't get a relationship going with her if I was you though. I think that's sort of implied.

Maybe keep her around and pound her monkeyhole a few times, but nothing more.

 

[TheNewGuy]

good job man.


I wouldn't get a relationship going with her if I was you though. I think that's sort of implied.

Maybe keep her around and pound her monkeyhole a few times, but nothing more.

Heh, we actually talked about that for a bit. She just came out of a big relationship and doesn't want another one, I kinda don't want a relationship (honestly i don't know wtf I want) and we both kinda agreed that it wouldn't work out if we dated. She denied me like three times before that night because she didn't want to be a w hore (classic anti-slut defense) but I managed to break through that.

As long as I don't feed her too much attention, I got her. She had a looot of interest in me before (like I said) but I tried playing the indifferent role, and acted like I didn't really care. She said she thought I had no interest, so thats why she stopped for a little bit.

All in all its a pretty weird situation, but whatever.


EDIT: I found out the reason she had to leave school early that day was because of a gyno appointment

 

[KillaCam]

Keep us updated, i'll be interested to hear developments, or possibly lack of.

 

[TheNewGuy]

I feel like I'm getting too attached to her.

All this time I've been saying "I don't want a girlfriend" but I really don't know. Maybe I said that because I couldn't get a girlfriend back then? Maybe I'm scared of getting hurt? When I talked to her that night my view of her went from a potential hookup, to something a little more. Maybe this is the whole "You want what you can't have" syndrome.

I just don't know. I'm trying to create a balance here, between not being a oneitis AFC and not being an isolationist DJ. I've worked so hard to seperate myself from the person that I was three years ago, now I feel like I'm going back. That simultaneously upsets and intrigues me.


I called her last night, she said she didn't know if she could go out. I said "well figure that out and let me know" and she didn't call me back. Normally I would take that as a huge rejection, but it just seems to be different with her. Shes real confusing.

EDIT: 400th post.

EDIT 2: I should also mention that this girl was the subject of my AFC oneitis about 2 years ago. If you told me I'd be in this situation at that time, I would probably say "Just be happy you've gotten to that point, you greedy fool." I know I've said that countless times when I used to read about how someone got a girls number, but she didn't pick up the phone. I would then say it about the people that got a date with a girl, but she wasn't very reciprocative of his moves. Then I'd say it about situations like mine. Now I've noticed myself saying it about LTR breakups. I feel like I'll never be happy. Whatever I get, it feels like its not enough.

 

[IceCream]

She's scared and confused. She doesn't want to become a "*****". She feels that if she goes out with you, she'll be considered a "*****". What you can do is try and initiate alot of kino, this will show her that you are interested (just telling her you are wont really do much, it might even scare her). If she responds positively to your kino, build it up. Soon enough she'll grow comfortable with you, you would have built trust, and then schedule a date from there. This takes work, this kind of girl, you came in a bad time. BUT do not give up, because she is interested.

 

[JLW]

hey thenewguy, are you located in the USA? If so, what state?

I don't mean to sound like a jackass (but I will anyway):

If she's really that much of an AW, why would you want a long term relationship with her anyway?

If I were you I would start getting other girls' numbers to avoid getting attached.

There is NOTHING worse than getting attached to an AW. I speak from experience. Later on she will probably crush you, and badly.

What exactly is it that makes you want to date this girl? I'm talking like personality qualities here. I advise you to be very picky when it comes to LTR's.

 

[TheNewGuy]

hey thenewguy, are you located in the USA? If so, what state?

Why?

I don't mean to sound like a jackass (but I will anyway):

If she's really that much of an AW, why would you want a long term relationship with her anyway?

If I were you I would start getting other girls' numbers to avoid getting attached.

There is NOTHING worse than getting attached to an AW. I speak from experience. Later on she will probably crush you, and badly.

What exactly is it that makes you want to date this girl? I'm talking like personality qualities here. I advise you to be very picky when it comes to LTR's.

I honestly can't really answer any of those questions. I think I was attempting to dequalify her by calling her a AW, in an attempt to save my ego from the fact that she wasn't interested.

But then it turns out she was interested.

At one point I had prospects with three girls, her being one of them. Thus far, shes the only one to really show a good amount of interest back. Maybe thats why I'm getting attached?

Personality qualities, shes fun to be around. Shes playful. I just feel better around her.

I have a lot to think about.

 

[JLW]

The reason I ask is because she sounds a lot like my ex, who was an AW, and did a LOT of the same things, and i just recently broke up with her. That would be TOO much of a funny coincidence if this girl was my ex. If she is in fact my ex, then stay the hell away from her. She has a huge list of problems. I would definitely fvck her a few times, cuz damn she's fun in bed, but i wouldn't pursue a relationship with her because she's messed up in the head.

After reading that first post, I realize that it definitely wasn't her for a bunch of reasons.

But anyway, for an LTR, you really need to be extremely picky. They need to show to you that they are loyal, truthful, good girls. And they need to show that to you through their actions, NOT what they say.

Any girl can say, "Oh I never cheated on any of my bf's" or anything like that, but theres no way of telling if its true. Avoid getting too attached.

Don't tell her that you're qualifying her for an LTR, obviously, but examine her closely. See how she acts and decide VERY carefully whether this girl is worthy.

Another thing to realize is that you're 16. You really shouldn't be tied down. I do not advise it at all.



So my advice to you is this: You hooked up with this girl. Good job. Don't pay TOO much attention to her. Get a couple more girls. Get their numbers, go on dates with them too. In the meantime, look at her actions and if you think she is worthy of an LTR with you. You can do this with the other girls you get numbers from, also.