Help! I would like to get my Ex back.

[Lozboss]

Hey guys,

Just wanna say I've been lurking this thread and I'm going to use the great advice on my Own situation. Thanks to everyone who gave some.

After NC for 60 days I tried to rekindle with the ex which culminated in her telling me she was only attracted to me 'as a friend at the moment' (March 21st). Since then I've been ignoring most of her whatsapps, dating others and no contact.

She is now the one who has to initiate contact with me.

My trouble is understanding when to reply and ignore? The one text I have replied to I left it 24 hours before I Did.
I'd welcome some advice.

 

[Tiguere]

Hey guys,

Just wanna say I've been lurking this thread and I'm going to use the great advice on my Own situation. Thanks to everyone who gave some.

After NC for 60 days I tried to rekindle with the ex which culminated in her telling me she was only attracted to me 'as a friend at the moment' (March 21st). Since then I've been ignoring most of her whatsapps, dating others and no contact.

She is now the one who has to initiate contact with me.

My trouble is understanding when to reply and ignore? The one text I have replied to I left it 24 hours before I Did.
I'd welcome some advice.

you ignore until she shows up naked unannounced.

 

[Lozboss]

you ignore until she shows up naked unannounced.

Hmmm - Thanks I guess.

Was looking for something more comprehensive. I doubt completley ignoring her will work (she'll just go- 'f*ck him').

I presume I have to throw her tit bits of my attention.

 

[hithard]

Hey guys,

Just wanna say I've been lurking this thread and I'm going to use the great advice on my Own situation. Thanks to everyone who gave some.

After NC for 60 days I tried to rekindle with the ex which culminated in her telling me she was only attracted to me 'as a friend at the moment' (March 21st). Since then I've been ignoring most of her whatsapps, dating others and no contact.

She is now the one who has to initiate contact with me.

My trouble is understanding when to reply and ignore? The one text I have replied to I left it 24 hours before I Did.
I'd welcome some advice.

Whats the outcome you are aiming for?

 

[Lozboss]

Whats the outcome you are aiming for?

I want us to get back together and try again.

 

[hithard]

Getting an ex back generally isn't that hard, why you would want to go back is the question you need to ask yourself. There is a lot of good advice on this thread about getting a girl back. The problem is guys inner game, they instantly revert to beta mode the moment they get a foot in the door. You fall into old patterns- she will notice, then the $hitfights start again and she is in the position of power as you are the one trying to make it work.

The process of breaking up usually goes like this when your inner game is off:
Breakup
You or her end it. You want the safety net back, she was already over you.

She goes out with friends and brushes her teeth with other guys co.ck, you for months idealize the relationship in your head making it better then what it was.

Contact is reestablished
Maybe the guys she has boned treat her like a hor, or the guy she is interested in won't break to her will - that little doubt forms in her mind and in you ride like the lone beta ranger.

You get back together, you fall back into old patterns. She knows she has options and the upperhand. Even if she was the one chasing you. If you fall back to old patterns her respect for you will be gone. Just the act of taking her back to willingly looses a large chunk. The first month is critical in setting the frame of how it will pan out.
The safest way to maintain frame is having other women in your life in a way that she feels that she has to fight for attention.

Personally going back to an ex is about as appealing as poking a fire with my di.ck. If you are weak and looking to go back out of fear or the safety factor than perhaps its time to go beyond the fence and into the wild.