"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Help. Don't want to come off as a douchebag or a stalker

ImprovingJuan

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ok i need some advice here from you guys. this is what happened i was at the hospital today to have a bronchoscopy and this cute nurse who i would rate a 6.5/7 (cute short brunette with curly long black hair, not stunning but attractive) showed me into the room, tried to make me feel comfortable and we started talking about the procedure, how i saw some creepy videos on youtube and she started laughing.

after a while i saw her leaving the room where i was waiting to had the procedure and after she went through the exit door, she would turn her head back and look into my eyes and smile to me and this happened the whole morning, our eyes locking in and we smiling back to each other.

i know when a woman looks at me with more than simpathy in her eyes. she was either: a) interested or b) teasing me to approach her and then reject me.

she came to me with some tea and cookies and i asked her name which she told me, i was about to ask her number but i blocked out and asked her something stupid about some medical exams i had to show my doctor. maybe i was afraid of getting rejected in front of the other nurses... lost the chance.


i was thinking of calling the hospital where she works and tell her if she comes to the phone (a simple task really cuz she told me her name) that i found her very nice and interesting and ask for her cellphone # or facebook, so we could meet and go for a cup of cofee later on.

thing is i dont know how will she react and i dont want to come off as a cheesy douche or a stalker.

i havent had a rejection in some time because i've been avoiding to ask girls out... but she had this look in her eyes though like she was saying: i kinda like you. ask me out dummy

my brother who was also there, waiting for me, told me to forget it that she was a wearing a ring (married? bf?), but i frankly didnt see one... what would you guys do? would you call her and check if she was just teasing or really interested and how would you do it?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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ImprovingJuan

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CaptainSaveAh0 said:
You had your chance, and didn't go for it. I would move on.
i wasnt expecting it to happen mate. nothing good has been happenning in my life right now (father dying, problems in the family and @ job), having a girl give eye contact and smiling was a bit of a surprise and also a sign that i'm not dead, i'm still in the game.

on the other hand how could i know that she wasnt a tease playing with me and was waiting for me to close the # and reject me?
 

CaptainSaveAh0

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ImprovingJuan said:
i wasnt expecting it to happen mate. nothing good has been happenning in my life right now (father dying, problems in the family and @ job), having a girl give eye contact and smiling was a bit of a surprise and also a sign that i'm not dead.

anyway how could i know that she wasnt a tease playing with me?
Sorry to hear that. I guess you couldn't really know anything unless you talked to her more and found out. Woman will smile at you for many reasons and it is important not to over analyze things like that.

If a woman smiles at you it could mean a lot of things. She might be attracted to you, she might just be friendly and smile at everyone, it might be part of her job, there is endless reasons behind this.

The way I see it chances like that are a hit or miss. Usually if a girl smiles at me and is fairly responsive I will know she is interested and try and go for at least a number close. If not then you miss a chance you might not ever have again, the worst that can happen is you getting rejected.

But I do understand it isn't easy especially when you are going through tough times in your life.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

ImprovingJuan

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there were other nurses there, she acted differently if you know what i mean. you just feel it. i reallly should have close the #, who knows i might've been lucky.
 

SgtSplacker

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When i'm in a situation like this i'll start to talk about going out, places to party, things I do on weekends. I'll ask her if she is in a relationship and talk about the dating world a bit.

These are topics that can only lead to one thing. She will see where this is going... So, if she is on board she will respond and add her own experiences if she's not really feeling you, she will keep things short and professional.

I try to feel out a girl before I go all fatal attraction asking for a number. I don't like getting shot down by a girl I may have to see again...
 

CaptainSaveAh0

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ImprovingJuan said:
there were other nurses there, she acted differently if you know what i mean. you just feel it. i reallly should have close the #, who knows i might've been lucky.
Next time you encounter a situation like that then number close. Remember you have nothing to lose when trying for a number close except a rejection. I mean you could go back there and try and find her. It is really up to you.

But if I was in that situation then i wouldn't.
 

ImprovingJuan

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would you guys would think asking for her facebook instead of the # would be a less "invasive" way to get to know her?
 

CaptainSaveAh0

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ImprovingJuan said:
would you guys would think asking for her facebook instead of the # would be a less "invasive" way to get to know her?
Avoid social media at all costs, its better to ask her number.

I agree with SRGT, it is better to somehow get a conversation with her going and find out some important things about her before asking for her number. Build some rapport with her first and make her feel comfortable with you then number close.

In your situation now that will be hard to do unless you somehow run into her again.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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