"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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help brahs, new GF seems to be still interested in EX or butthurt, Idk anymore

randombrah1

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how do I even start, damn.

Well first lemme explain the dynamic of the relationship, we've been 3 months together, I control the frame, she initiates contact almost everyday (text me "I love you", "I miss you" and lovey dove stuff), I obviously care about her, everything would be perfect but then... red flags;
Even though she post things about us on fb and on my wall, theres something that caught my eye.

-She has posted songs implying that she is "over her ex" (the lyrics she quote, were something like "Now I've found the love of my life, and after all its amazing that we still can be friends")
-The other day she was checking her fb on her phone, I was minding my own bussiness but then I realized that she stills have him marked as "best friend" (you know, the feature where you get notifications of what is the other person doing)
-And a while ago she awared me that her ex tried to contact her (that he missed her and wanted to meet up, to catch up)... her response to his proposal is what got me thinking... she said: "I cant" (was expecting, "I dont want to"... this is by far the strongest red flag)

Now im rethinking everything brahs, im pulling out emotionally of the relationship and im sure she is starting to realize this.

How to approach this situation?
am I overthinking?

Extra info:
im 22, shes 21.
I forgot to add that they broke up like 3 years ago and her ex already has been with his gf for like a year (I didnt even asked for this info, she was sharing it), and he was her first

Need an outsider perspective. (Posted this on the mature forum, but now I cant answer... how to delete it? sorry for that, im new to the forum and still getting used to the dynamic)
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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randombrah1

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bump
 

Albatross953

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Dude, I'm not gonna sugar coat this. Exes are murder. She's still not over him. Song lyrics, contact...come on dude.
Don't marry this girl, and don't get pregnant. First hand experience dude.
Run...
 

zinc4

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Did he dump her? If so, then yeah, she probably still aint over him at all.
 

PlayHer Man

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Never compromise your deal-breakers. We all have them.

All men should have a list of deal-breakers for relationships. When a woman does a deal-breaker.. TELL HER that what she is doing is a deal-breaker and if she continues with it.. the relationship will be over like there's no tomorrow. And MEAN IT.

A woman who values you will adjust to your desires. A woman who rebels should be dropped like a hot potato. :kick:

100% of women (no matter how passive, submissive, traditional, or nice) will try to erode your power in the relationship as it continues.

Little known fun fact --> Men bond stronger to things with time.. while women become more detached to things with time.

This is why LONG relationships are usually dominated by the woman.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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donking

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Good point playher man.

Although I posit that a woman's bond is U-shaped, while a man's bond is an inverted-U shape.

You'll see when you get into a relationship of 2+ years, men's bond peaks by 1-2 years and then subsequently drops off again. Women's bond dips in the middle when she think she has you, but then rises again as yours drops. They are an inverse reflection of you.
 
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