"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Heavy awkwardness, need help?

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DJ Axton

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Hey everyone. I was kinda surprised there was no thread I could find already.

So I need a little advice about an awkward situation that is getting more awkward by the second. I held a small social gathering about a week ago, to which a few friend came round, a few of which were female. Unfortunately after a little alcohol me and one of the females got up to things (I won't bore you with details, but it was nothing major). That should have been the end of it, but you know how things are in college; stuff like this, no matter how small or insignificant, gets blown out of proportion and spreads like a bad rash.

Believe it or not, I didn't find out until today that this has become known throughout our friends and of course people have milked this for all its worth and made the while situation more awkward than it already was.

Of course, its really awkward when were together now and I really don't know how to stop this. Is there an easy way to eliminate the awkwardness between us? And WHY do college kids have to blow stuff like this out of proportion and make it a big deal? How do I stop this?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DismantleRepair

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So is she supposed to be just a friend or what? I really can't help you without a bit more detail.
 
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DJ Axton

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Yeah I'm perfectly happy that she's just a friend, I just some advice on how to eliminate the awkwardness between us, cause you know how things like this lasts for days in school environments.

I realise this is such a cliche situation but I've never been through it myself before.
 
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DismantleRepair

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Well if you do value her as a friend and nothing more, and you're absolutely sure of this and want it to stay that way, then she deserves to be treated like a friend, not a girl you're trying to pick up.

I would take her aside and talk to her. Break the ice on this ish. If you don't address this head on, then every interaction you have with her will still feel weird, even if you're talking to each other, because you'll be thinking whether it's on her mind, and if it's affecting you as well.

So say whatever you need to say,
And get the awkwardness out of the way.

(woo! Rhyming couplet!)
 
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