"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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HB8 does not like me talking to her HB4 mate.

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Deadly_Assassin

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I see HB4 at the flying school but I have never talked to her till I met her in town one night. HB4 is not fat, but is not blessed in the department of looks. I saw her out in town one night. She was sitting by herself in the club. Her friend, the HB8 was busy getting attention from all the guys. I went up to HB4 and started a convo about the flying school. Well, HB8 comes along and says something to HB4. HB4 tries to introduce HB8 to me but HB8 fully ignores me. Me and HB4 just start talking about flying again. We have a chat and then I go along my way.

Last night, I saw HB4 in town again. Again, she was sitting by herself. We talk again and I ask HB4 to put her number in my phone. HB8 fully butts in and tries to stop HB4 from giving her number to me. HB4 still puts her number in my phone. I text HB4 later and she tells me shes on her way home. I ask her when is she flying next. I was drunk when I was texting this. I get a text from HB4 about her next flight. I don't reply. I get another blank message from HB4 and I still don't reply. I don't have any interest in HB4. But I would love to teach HB8 a lesson. any suggestions?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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ARrocket

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You are already teaching HB8 a "lesson" by talking to HB4 instead.

Don't lead HB4 on....that's not cool.
 
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MotownMack

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^^^ I agree. She was probably annoyed that you we're ignoring her back. Whether or not the HB8 had any interest in you or not, I know AW's often get annoyed when they are not the center of attention, regardless of their IL in you.

Also agree about the not leading the HB4 on. I don't want to assume anything-maybe you're into the HB4 as a friend-if so, cool. Then you'll probably get another shot to put the HB8 in her place. But don't pretend to have a romantic interest in her if you don't, under any circumstances, really.

Personally, I would just let it go. Some people are just haters.
 
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Social Calibration

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If you're not interested in HB4 don't lead her on, and if you want to teach HB8 a "lesson", then call her out on her bull****.

If she butts in again say to HB4, "Look! It's your rude friend again, Hi rude friend" and smile. She'll get the idea.
 
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Deadly_Assassin

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Yea, I am trying not to lead the HB4 on. Thats why I am not texting her. She seems like a nice person. I would prefer that we are just casual friends.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Social Calibration

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Then make sure you emphasize the friends part in your actions and interactions with her so she gets it.
 
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