HB7 Field Report

[Jizzee]

Met a girl on Myspace about a week ago, we got chatting, exchanged numbers and that, texting loads, her interest was at about 110%. Now, she had been sending messages to me saying that she thinks im totally hot and that she cant wait to get hugs off me and all this. She wanted to come over on thursday night but i said no because i still live with parents and kinda wanted to respect that. She understood and we decided to meet up saturday instead. So tonight i couldnt go out with my friend and she found out, so she suggested we meet up. Well we did, both a bit nervous. Now I will state at this point that I have a speech impediment an that I find it difficult to speak sometimes, it gets to the stage where I prefer not to speak instead of speaking because having to stammer is so embarrassing. Back to le story...
We met up, i got totally lost and she had to direct me. Got into car, had a bit of a laugh, then we drove to get some chips (French Fries for the american among us), chatted a lil bit more and then all of a sudden somewhat, the conversation just dried up. I couldnt think of anything to talk about that we hadnt already talked about. After about 50 mins of being together I suggested that I dropped her off at home. She was like "oh ok no problem" so I did. When she was about to get out the car, for some reason I gave her a hug, she didnt like reciprocate it, but she smiled and said "awww bless"(Which is my most annoying pet peeve bout women cos I find it so patronising) she closed the door and asked if ill be on MSN tonight, i said yeah. Drove off. Came home, after bout 10 mins I went online and she was on. I said Hi, she was like glad u got back ok. I then thought to hell with this, use them balls and I just said:
"am i wasting my time with u?" she said:
"what do u mean?" to which i said:
"just got the feeling that u were bored and not interested"
she said:
awww tbh im not really looking for a relationship right now"
That actually made me laugh, and I replied with "awww bless ya, well it was nice knowing ya and good luck with everything"
after a couple mins she said "errr ok"
and i said "bye" she then said bye!

Ive read the book of pook, so I know what her "im not looking for a relationship" means. It was either a physical thing or there just wasnt a connection. To be honest Im more interested in what improvements I can make for my next plate cos im not actually arsed about her.

Improvements I could make:

-I acted a bit AFC when we were texting and on MSN, just stuff like "id give u a big hug". Not necessarily bad, but I felt like I was trying to please.

- I wasnt scarce enough. I think I could have just made myself appear more busy, or better yet, been more busy lol

- Make sure that there are still things to talk about when we met.

- not get so into her so quickly, it had only been a week!

- Make sure I practice my breathing technique which enables me to talk without stammering....it was just shear lazyness on my part and perhaps contributed to the no connection thing.

there are more I just cant think of anything right now!

Thankfully, I am spinning quite a few plates at the moment so Im just gonna focus on them and making myself better!!

Any comments/thoughts appreciated?

 

[Mr. Wolf]

It appears that all your problems stem from you as a man expecting a woman to create opportunity and take responsibility for sex..

That is, there you are sitting, not doing anything or talking about sh1t. You're lost, you don't know where you going.. You were expecting this girl to lead you into the bedroom, spread her legs, and let you inside.. They don't do that..

It is your job to lead her towards sex, at a level she's comfortable with, but you might push her a little further once in a while. You're allowed to do that once every time you see her..


Next time you're with a woman realize that she wants to have sex and will be eager to do so if you create opportunity for it and be discreet about it.. That's your job, do so, even if you studder along the way.. Besides it would be funny to see a man sudder and all that and do all the right things and bang the chick..



This girl wanted to meet you at your place. Do you think that was to play chess? No. She was allowing you to create opportunity for sex at your place, quick!! See, she was sort of leading you and you suck at following, so stop it and start leading..

 

[Jizzee]

well I wholeheartidy agree with your analysis there mate. I did realize when she asked to come over that it was just an opportunity for sex, but like i say, i respect my parents decision that they dont like random girls coming over, just gf's. I could have asked her out like so there would be no problems, but tbh, and this is hard to admit, I think I was scared of success. Moving into new place in about 5 months tho so it will be a sex-fest hopefully by then lol
I do need to start to push woman a ittle bit more, and basicaly just try and enjoy the experience, instead of worrying about whats gonna happen, because thats what I was thinking about on my way to meeting her, and I got nervous about what if's. Which led to my speech being all f***ed up from worrying.

Ive already signed up for a speech therapy class which whenever I go to it, it always improves my confidence greatly and allows me to speak fluently.

Not sure if this is approapriate but theres a saying that I once heard:

"What do you call a leader with no followers?? Just a guy talking a walk"!

Cheers for your insight mate

 

[Jizzee]

Like I said in my earlier post I did like this girl, we just seemed to click. I was pretty suprised by her wanting to come over as well, all I did was be honest with my intentions towards her, without mentioning sex, she threw up a couple of Sh!t tests like, but i just ignored them and told her the way it was gonna be. I guess I was scared of success, scared of actually succeeding at this.

That meditation thing actually does seem to work. I went out for a department night out last night, and spent 30 minutes just on my own, relaxing, eyes closed, thinking about what i want from the night, and how im gonna achieve it. And I ended up kissing 3 girls and dancing with 2 more.

Thanks for your comments guys

 

[cordoncordon]

You guys are way off base here. She wanted to meet up at first when she still had this fantasy in her head about Jizzee and who he was and what he looked like. Very common in internet correspondence. You create a false idea of who the person you are meeting really is, only to be let down 9 times out of 10 when you actually do meet. Once they actually met in real life, her fantasy of you disappeared, and as much as I hate to say it...she just wasn't that into you.

Even if she had come over that first original night, my guess is the same thing would have happened...nothing.

Don't take it personally, not everyone will be attracted to you.

Good luck!