HB7.5 prefers beta guy, wth?

[nroug7]

I love how everyone here is throwing around terms like "Betas" "Chemistry" and all that other stuff.
He just didn't play well enough, it doesn't get more complicated then that.

 

[1-800-HellNo]

I love how everyone here is throwing around terms like "Betas" "Chemistry" and all that other stuff.
He just didn't play well enough, it doesn't get more complicated then that.

Similar thing happened to me just last week, and I feel that I let him beat me, because i didn't leave.

Basically the dude was 35, practically crying about how he can't find anyone who loves him. They were co-workers and friends.

Sure, maybe i shouldn't use the word "beta," but this guy was thinking he'd get a pity fvck, and it was clear he wasn't.
He was so pathetic he even paid for MY drinks, while trying to c0ck block me...
He didn't offer, I told him he was paying and he just said "ok"

I know she isn't gonna sleep with this guy, but our date was going great until he started to get all needy.
I should've gotten in my car and driven home, instead of sticking around. I can only blame myself.
If I would've left earlier, she would've looked back on me different. Now she probably sees me as desperate.
Which is funny, because the only reason i stayed was to observe WTF was happening.

 

[floydb25]

One thing I've learned is that guys are generally the worst when it comes to judging other guys (especially when it comes to looks, personality, and physical attraction), and comparing what other's have to themselves, AND what women find attractive in men (especially wondering why she chose another over them). A lot of it has to do with ego, competition, arrogance, and jealousy. And just plain assuming and not knowing ****.

Most of what men find weak, "gay", annoying, stupid, douchey, or corny women find funny, sexy, intriguing, etc. A lot of girls do like opening up shy men, find certain characteristics appealing that you don't, do find satisfaction in comfort and familiarity, find that "friends" grow on them and become sexually appealing; things popping up that they didn't know existed before, etc, etc. A lot of stuff that you DON'T see going on in these public interactions, as well. Especially with shy guys, as it takes them longer to open up. But girls still find them intriguing and mysterious.

Don't assume that you know what every woman wants (ie, you, and all of your marvelous qualities), because you'll be shocked when you find out it's not what they actually want. Not a lot of girls actually want an out-going, aloof, spiffed out party boy player, or whatever. Many positive qualities are still found appealing to women.

Almost every guy I've ever known has down-played the competition - while simultaneously boasting about how awesome they are in comparison. Never fails. They're the best thing ever, and everyone else is ****. They also think they know what women want, and boast about how glorious and attractive they are - only to end up with ****. Then they come up with all these rediculous, self-satisfying ideas and excuses on why they chose another over them. It's all ego.

But the main thing is, she chose him and not you. So, who's the beta here? :cheer:

Point is, don't assume anything.

 

[zinc4]

Similar thing happened to me just last week, and I feel that I let him beat me, because i didn't leave.

Basically the dude was 35, practically crying about how he can't find anyone who loves him. They were co-workers and friends.

Sure, maybe i shouldn't use the word "beta," but this guy was thinking he'd get a pity fvck, and it was clear he wasn't.
He was so pathetic he even paid for MY drinks, while trying to c0ck block me...
He didn't offer, I told him he was paying and he just said "ok"

I know she isn't gonna sleep with this guy, but our date was going great until he started to get all needy.
I should've gotten in my car and driven home, instead of sticking around. I can only blame myself.
If I would've left earlier, she would've looked back on me different. Now she probably sees me as desperate.
Which is funny, because the only reason i stayed was to observe WTF was happening.

Dude, if you pulled that you are paying crap with me i would have told you how cheap you were right in front of the girl and said fine i don't mind doing charity every once in a while and paid just to spite you.....you made yourself look like an a$$ and cheap at the same time...no wonder he ended up with the girl....that seriously would have pi$$ed me off if someone pulled that on me. You shouldn't act like a bully and then say the other guy is a beta/wuss.

 

[nroug7]

The point is, game is not a rulebook, it is a flexible instrument.
There's no set definition of how to play. There's no real rules, only you and your opposition (the chick you are gaming.) and your objective is to weaken the enemies defence.
Of course, you are unable to see what your opponents defence is, but if you deploy radars, learn how to pick up signals and change your plan of attack consistently you can quickly lower any enemies defence.

 

[buzzin_frog]

Hello.

I've been gaming a bit his HB7.5 who's 28 yo for some weeks. One day I got her number, some days later I asked her out for a drink and she kind of declined it.
Some weeks later I tried again and she declined it again.

Is this the same online chick you acted beta with?

Eventhough this girl declined my invitations to go for a drink, I felt the chemistry between us BUT, what just happened? these two are now boyfriend and girlfriend! wtf?

Just because YOU felt chemistry, doesn't mean SHE felt any chemistry. After all, she declined to have drinks with you. What does that tell you? There was no chemistry. If there was, she would be banging you!!

I'm funier than this guy, taller, stronger, I dress way better, and I teased this girl and I was not paying attention to her all the time like him, but, see what happened.
Then only thing I see this guy does better than me, is that he dances better, but so what??

Sounds like jealousy to me!! This is just your own opinion!! You have no idea how this guy acts when they are alone together. You just see him dance, you have no idea what other things he can do. He probably bangs her really good!!

This guy is for sure an average frustrated chump, but what the heck?

How so? He is banging the chick that you dream of banging!!

We see here an example of a hot girl that does not want an alpha, she prefers a beta.

Are you saying that you're an Alpha? An Alpha, wouldn't concern himself with this nonsense like you are!!

 

[zinc4]

Is this the same online chick you acted beta with?



Just because YOU felt chemistry, doesn't mean SHE felt any chemistry. After all, she declined to have drinks with you. What does that tell you? There was no chemistry. If there was, she would be banging you!!



Sounds like jealousy to me!! This is just your own opinion!! You have no idea how this guy acts when they are alone together. You just see him dance, you have no idea what other things he can do. He probably bangs her really good!!



How so? He is banging the chick that you dream of banging!!



Are you saying that you're an Alpha? An Alpha, wouldn't concern himself with this nonsense like you are!!

agreed

 

[Bossman90]

Women have types bro. No set amount of value is gonna work for every girl i.e. being alpha. I know a girl like this and she goes for chodes, that i swear to god that I a can beat because I am a true alpha male(was one before pu) but yet the girl I know prefers more of the emotional connection type of game i.e ***** sweat talking(beta dudes).Sounds like you got a case of what I just mentioned.Watch how he treats her and learn by seeing what she reacts to and it might make it easier for you to steal away from him.

 

[pyros]

For the ppl here that said that Im not that alphay and he probably is more, its ok, I do not care about it. Im just saying that I have more alpha traits than him, im not saying im the ultimate alpha warrior lol.

And, I also think as some of you said, that this girl may have choosen this guy not because she really feels attracted to him, but for other reasons like:
he treats her very well, he's submissive, he would do anything for her, she has not to worry that he will cheat on her, he's 33 she's 28 her clock is ticking.
Also there are many girls that are with dudes for different reasons besides love/attraction, you know?

And, as I said before, this guy was desperate to find a girlfriend, he's been going to virtually all the lessons you can attend at this salsa club for more than a year. I've seen many girls reject him, cute to average to pretty ugly girls. He's complained to me that he could not find a girl...that it was so difficult etc, so this is why I say hes more beta than alpha.

He got lucky now I guess, but we'll see how this turns out.

P.S.
I have a female friend that started to date a guy she did not find attractive at all. She was seing some dude she really liked, but this guy went back to his ex gf. Then my female friend got sad. After some weeks this dude asked her out and she accepted because she was feeling lonely and sad. Then one day she told me that they went on 5 dates and she did not even kiss him and they had dinner at his place. She also said that eventhough she did not feel chemistry, this guy was so nice to her, he would do anything for her and he was 'ok looking', so after some more weeks she had sex with him. But, after some more weeks, she dumped him because the other dude appeared again.
Crazy girls.

 

[starfishandcoffee]

She may be "dating down" for her own security.

The guy might be hung to the floor and be an absolute dominant freak in bed.

She may find shy guys attractive - really! Some girls don't go for Don Draper.

There are about 18 different answers to this, and almost none of them make sense. and my friend, that's the way women operate.

 

[Sandow]

All good answers here. Just remember that there is no Blueprint for game, so don't get all bent out of shape when something like this happens. It's part of life , don't fret over it and simply move on with very little concern.

 

[zekko]

I think guys here generally underestimate the importance of rapport. This couple has spent a lot of time together and gotten to know each other. Presumably they get along pretty well, are comfortable with each other, and enjoy talking to each other. Attraction is important, but if you can't "vibe" with a girl, it doesn't really do you much good, does it? It's kind of like all the guys here who complain that they are supposedly so good looking, but aren't able to hold onto a girl because they're too AFC, or dull, or don't know how to talk to a girl, or whatever.

Also there are many girls that are with dudes for different reasons besides love/attraction, you know?

While that does happen, I think you just want to believe that this girl is not attracted to this guy so you can protect your ego. Really, the idea that she isn't attracted to him is fairly ridiculous. Just because he doesn't fall into the rather narrow definition of an attractive guy that we see on this forum, doesn't really mean sh!t. For one thing, maybe he's a "situational alpha" on the dance floor. Really, you shouldn't dismiss his dancing abilities so easily. Dancing is one of the best ways a guy can show his confidence, and women pick up on that.

One thing I've learned is that guys are generally the worst when it comes to judging other guys (especially when it comes to looks, personality, and physical attraction), and comparing what other's have to themselves, AND what women find attractive in men (especially wondering why she chose another over them). A lot of it has to do with ego, competition, arrogance, and jealousy. And just plain assuming and not knowing ****.

This is so true. Men aren't (generally) attracted to other men, so they can't easily so what women find attractive in them. This is true with women also, to an extent. They can't always see what guys will find attractive in other women. Just last night, my girlfriend and I saw this girl walking down the street. I was thinking "Damn, she has a fine shape". And she said "Look at those stupid pants she's wearing. What the heck is she thinking?". Lol, that's what was going through her head.

Don't assume that you know what every woman wants (ie, you, and all of your marvelous qualities), because you'll be shocked when you find out it's not what they actually want. Not a lot of girls actually want an out-going, aloof, spiffed out party boy player

Well said. The pickup community seems to want to suggest all girls want a player type (since most of the community aspires to be player types). But they reveal the lie themselves because so many of them try to hide the fact that they are players from the girl so as to avoid rejection. Really, the pickup community is probably the only group that thinks that all women secretly want players.

 

[Mike32ct]

I'm not taking sides here; I like you pyros (no homo).

But I actually give this "beta" guy a lot of credit. I'm sure he KNOWS he's not a hot guy. He's well aware of all the rejections he's getting. BUT...

He's working his a$s off to be great at dance AND meet a girl. He goes to every class religiously and practices a lot. Most of all, despite the rejections, he kept going, determined to meet a girl.

 

[zinc4]

I see nothing beta about this guy...getting rejected is a good thing...it means he is consistently trying and doesn't get too down on himself to stop...he signed up for a dance class and he goes religiously and now he is good at dancing and has formed rapport with the girl that OP wants to get with...tell me what is beta about that...

OP I have nothing against you...but you are clearly trying to protect your ego...do what he did and get better at what you signed up for...dancing...you will see much more results than looking for people to agree with you on sosuave...

 

[synergy1]

One thing I've learned is that guys are generally the worst when it comes to judging other guys (especially when it comes to looks, personality, and physical attraction), and comparing what other's have to themselves, AND what women find attractive in men (especially wondering why she chose another over them). A lot of it has to do with ego, competition, arrogance, and jealousy. And just plain assuming and not knowing ****.


Point is, don't assume anything.

This is accurate - overconfidence bias is hard at work here. The OP overstates his advantages and understates the other guys qualities. He is in such denial , that even the result of the outcome doesn't change his mind ( she went after another dude and not him).

Point is that its not to get butt hurt when another guy out does them. Its not worth the whole ego thing to get caught up in the crap associated with wondering why a girl went after someone else instead of you. It happens. Women find other things attractive, and sometimes another guy is just taller/ better looking and women will change their mind in a matter of seconds. Seen it - been on the good and bad side of it.

The best thing to do is NOT pursue, and let her pursue you. Don't use FB unless its to set up a meeting, or for banter. It seems like you are trying too hard, and she kind of is onto it. As soon as the male becomes the pursuer, It seems to end badly in my experience..

 

[Mike32ct]

I see nothing beta about this guy...getting rejected is a good thing...it means he is consistently trying and doesn't get too down on himself to stop...he signed up for a dance class and he goes religiously and now he is good at dancing and has formed rapport with the girl that OP wants to get with...tell me what is beta about that...

OP I have nothing against you...but you are clearly trying to protect your ego...do what he did and get better at what you signed up for...dancing...you will see much more results than looking for people to agree with you on sosuave...

Agreed. That's why I put "beta" in quotes.

OP: Definitely work harder at dance if that is your thing. Then when meet chicks that like your looks and personality type, you'll have stronger dance skills to go with it.

I take dance myself. It takes a lot of work. I just got a private lesson last night and realized how much more I need to practice.

But don't take the situation with this chick personally. It's just one girl out of a class of several.

 

[zekko]

One thing I really hate about this forum is the tendency to disrespect and underestimate guys who are out in the real world, and not on this forum. Most guys out there are just like the guys in here, they're trying to do the best the can, improve themselves, get with some girls, and try to make themselves into the most that they can be.

Good points below:

But I actually give this "beta" guy a lot of credit. I'm sure he KNOWS he's not a hot guy. He's well aware of all the rejections he's getting. BUT...

He's working his a$s off to be great at dance AND meet a girl. He goes to every class religiously and practices a lot. Most of all, despite the rejections, he kept going, determined to meet a girl.

I see nothing beta about this guy...getting rejected is a good thing...it means he is consistently trying and doesn't get too down on himself to stop...he signed up for a dance class and he goes religiously and now he is good at dancing and has formed rapport with the girl that OP wants to get with...tell me what is beta about that...

 

[ArcBound]

A lot of people are just questioning OP's own value rather than address his overall point: HB choosing beta over alpha. If you guys haven't seen this in real life then youre not looking. I know a HB10 model who has hooked up w/RHCP members who's boyfriend is a male 5/10 nobody.

A woman who hooks up and fvcks high status people and then dates in the longterm some beta dude...

Damn...where have I heard that dynamic before?