HB building me up or is she genuine?

[The LadyKiller]

There is a HB who I recently met and we discovered we have a lot of things in common. She also showed some IOI's as we were talking. Like any good DJ, I called her up after we exchanged numbers. She seemed excited about our plans, but her family was in town so we couldn't do anything. The following week, I called again and got no response. Because she was acting cooler towards me - maybe my C&F had gotten stale (?), I assumed that was it and it was time to move on. It happens.

And then today comes. She runs into me and immediately points out/compliments a minor tweak in my style. After that, she asks,

HB - Hey did you call me a few days ago?
ME - I did, but it's no big dea--
HB - See, my phone's been all screwy (shows me something on her phone - not sure what I'm supposed to be looking at). I didn't even see that you called (sounded bummed). If I can't answer the phone, text me and I'll always call you back." (I had left a brief voicemail, she said she doesn't really listen to VM's).
ME - Don't worry about it.

After that, she made me aware she was heading to the cafeteria with people in her department if I wanted to stop by (she then added "hurry up" when I told her I'd stop by soon). We work in different departments, but it's a big building so we all share the one large cafeteria.

Unfortunately, a few days ago, my friend did a little investigating on social media and he tells me that this HB has a boyfriend who is either from back home or overseas. At that point (along with what I thought was her cooling off), I figured it was over, so I sent a facebook friend request. She conspicuously has yet to accept, and I know/get along with her a lot better than my friend does.

So in short, I'm all confused. On one hand, this HB is showing some definite IOI's and is a fun person who enjoys my company. On the other hand, I can also see this as the HB leading me on and then dropping the bf bomb on me. What's the best way to approach this? I've been talking to a few other girls, but those interactions are in the beginning stages.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

No need to over-analyze or complicate this situation.

Give her the benefit of the doubt on this whole phone excuse, even though it sounds like bs, its most likely a cover up to the real reason of her having a bf.

However, its pretty clear that she has some interest in you & women are ALWAYS looking to upgrade.

So forget about calling her and leaving VM's, not to make this a call vs text debate, but 99% of people text when contacting new people they have met.

If she texts back, flirt with her a bit and then when its at a good point ask her to hang out. Now a lot of guys mess up these simple things, so I'll lay it out for you.

Since she has a bf and is being somewhat secretive, when you ask her to hang out, I would say:

"lets meet up this week and do XYZ, what day works best for you?"

If she's interested she will accept and make time for you. If she truly can't make it on any day that particular week and she doesn't offer another day & time, then I would back off because she's not willing to take the next step.

That doesn't mean you should give up, simply back off and as always, be working on multiple women.

It sounds like you work with her, so what I would do if I were you is "run into her" at work, use those opportunities to flirt and increase her attraction for you.







PIMP

 

[The LadyKiller]

Thank you Pimp. We each have week-long vacations over the next month, but your advice is good and we'll see where it leads.

 

[foreverAFC]

sounds like her bf is a chump so she uses you for ego boosts

 

[nismo-4]

Judge by actions not words. Women who are interested in you won't confuse you. Call her bluff asap. Then you'll know if she's in another castle.

Go spin more plates.

Case closed.