Having a flirtatous personality

[speakeasy]

This may seem axiomatic, but all the guys I know who have been "naturals" with girls, they didn't necessarily have a big bag of c+f tricks up their sleeves. Some of them were shorter, some were taller, some good looking some average looking, but what I noticed they had was a naturally flirtatious personality. They never engaged women in much logical conversation. No talking about the weather, or who they would vote for in the next election, or how many years they went to school and what they studied. None of that, they seem to instantly engage women in conversation that sparked them on a feelings level. The girls's reactions would be maybe blushing, laughing, smiling but whatever they did and said, it was their feelings being stroked by these natural playas. They were natural flirts, and they knew how to be charming and funny at the same time. I'd look at the girl's face and you could tell she was having a great time. In fact, I'd say being charming + funny may even be better than ****y + funny. You might of course have to tune up the ****iness if the girl is higher than a 7 just to bring her ego down to earth.

I realize that my personality has a long way to go down this route. I don't have a flirtatious personality AT ALL. And this probably ties into why very intelligent and intellectual guys seem to do the worse with women. They are cerebral and haven't learned to communicate on an emotional level.To tell you the truth I'm not even sure how to flirt well. I am not very good at engaging women in emotionally relevant conversations. For those of us rAFCs that tend to be very thought and logic oriented such as myself, we need to learn how to open up the emotional side of the brain more because that is what you need to work with when gaming a woman. You cannot turn a woman on with logical discussion. And when these natural flirts do get asked logical questions by women in an attempt to turn the conversation in that direction, I notice they somehow know how to shrug that off and turn it back toward flirtiness. For example, a woman might say, "we have such nice sunny weather here in Miami." The guy with no game might reply "I know, back where I grew up, it snowed all the time, and I'd have to shovel the sidewalk, I'm so happy to be in Florida now!". Such conversations lead to no chemistry. The playa type dude would probably answer back, "it is sunny here, and I bet you'd look nice walking down the beach in a bikini right now". The girl would probably blush or laugh and it would lead the conversation in a more emotional, flirtatious direction.

So ask yourselves, do you practice trying to turn mundane questions and statements girls make(even girls you're not necessarily interested in) into flirtation? I need to start doing this as daily practice, as well as working on body posturing and as David DeAngelo suggests, slowing down your body movements and speech.

Just a little food for thought.

 

[ItWasntMe]

Having a flirtatious personality may seem like a great advantage but unfortunately I've learned that there is such a thing as having too many girlfriends. It's one of those the grass is always greener on the other side kind of things.


Anyways, try talking more with your hands and fluctuating your voice. I would say be yourself because it's always worked for me but funnily I think that's the first thing I ever read on this site. Talking with your hands will probably lead more easily to kino.. I do it unintentionally and well.. I suppose it's taken me far. Just don't go swinging your arms like your playing baseball or talking like your voice is cracking and you should be good.

 

[reset]

I don't have a flirtatious personality AT ALL. And this probably ties into why very intelligent and intellectual guys seem to do the worse with women. They are cerebral and haven't learned to communicate on an emotional level.

Bah! You had me up until this part. Number one, don't say **** like that about yourself man... that's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

It depends on what you're talking about here. Are you talking about intellectual guys that are cultured, well read (or film buffs etc.), and aware of what goes on in the world around them, or nerds? Because those are two different things.

I consider myself an intellectual, and I also have a flirtatious personality. And I know what you mean, small talk is lame. It's so much more fun to make fun of the girl or just start analysing them/tearing them apart (in a good natured way obviously).

Although you are correct that people who tend to live in their brains MAY have not developed their social skills, clearly the two are not mutually exclusive.

If you're looking for an example of someone who is overly intellectual and good with women, watch some Woody Allen movies. Yes, I said Woody Allen. The film Manhattan comes to mind, also Stardust Memories, Annie Hall... The list goes on and on. In his films he is always analyzing and living in his brain, but he's also always with a girl (while seducing another), or at some high class party, or whatever.

You need some role models.