Hi guys, I need some advice here.
warning: wall of text ahead, sorry
I'm 32, she's 25. We've been dating for about a month and a half, and we both agreed on keeping it cool and see what happens. We were seeing each other one or two times a week, having great sex, while we were also getting to know each other. She usually slept at my place after the dates, we used to have breakfast together, drive her home, texted lightly during the week, etc. She told me she liked me a lot, and that she liked the way things were going for the two of us, and I agreed. I've been dating a lot of girls in the last two years and this is the first time that I develop feelings for someone since my last ltr. I never told her about my feelings but I showed her clearly with my actions that I cared about her about more than just for sex, but always trying to keep it light, fun and sexy. I was pretty confident that everything was going to be alright if I played it cool.
Then, she went on a trip and you guessed it, things went south. When she came back, she was distant, taking very long time to answer my texts. Finally, I asked her what was going on and she told me that she'd met some guy (not clear if it was during the trip or before, while on her trip she used to text me and was sweet and loving, telling me she wanted to see me) and then told me that she couldn't handle being split in two and having feelings for two guys at the same time. That she was confused and, even though she didn't think things would work out with this guy, she needed to explore those feelings.
That hurt, but tried to keep my cool and told her that we have never actually agreed on being exclusive, and even though I entertained the possibility that she could be seeing other people, agreed that we can not see each other anymore after what she told me, at least for now. That I had a great time with her and that she is really special to me, and many women are going to pass trough my life until I find someone who makes me feel like she does (first time I talk about feelings to her). Told her that she had my number and she can contact me in the future, but I am not going to be waiting for her. Wished her good luck and that's it. She then started telling me what an amazing guy I am, that she had great fun with me, thanked me a lot and yada yada yada. And agreed that maybe in the future....that feelings where confusing for her right now, etc. Sounded pretty sad actually but you cannot trust women.
And then I went NC. Planning to spin plates again, have some fun and maybe meet someone better. But man, feelings are still there and are going to be there for some time. And something seems off, I just can't stop thinking that this whole thing sounds weird. And this Chad came out of the blue. Maybe chad doesn't even exist and she made that up because she got afraid of potential commitment. Feels like a **** test. This was less than a week ago. I haven't contacted her nor I will. She broke it, she has to fix it if she wants to.
Anyway, spin plates, no contact, that is the only way for now. Do you think I played it cool? I'm actually sincerely not mad, I just find it childish and I am a little sad that I cannot enjoy being with her anymore.
Thanks for reading me!
warning: wall of text ahead, sorry
I'm 32, she's 25. We've been dating for about a month and a half, and we both agreed on keeping it cool and see what happens. We were seeing each other one or two times a week, having great sex, while we were also getting to know each other. She usually slept at my place after the dates, we used to have breakfast together, drive her home, texted lightly during the week, etc. She told me she liked me a lot, and that she liked the way things were going for the two of us, and I agreed. I've been dating a lot of girls in the last two years and this is the first time that I develop feelings for someone since my last ltr. I never told her about my feelings but I showed her clearly with my actions that I cared about her about more than just for sex, but always trying to keep it light, fun and sexy. I was pretty confident that everything was going to be alright if I played it cool.
Then, she went on a trip and you guessed it, things went south. When she came back, she was distant, taking very long time to answer my texts. Finally, I asked her what was going on and she told me that she'd met some guy (not clear if it was during the trip or before, while on her trip she used to text me and was sweet and loving, telling me she wanted to see me) and then told me that she couldn't handle being split in two and having feelings for two guys at the same time. That she was confused and, even though she didn't think things would work out with this guy, she needed to explore those feelings.
That hurt, but tried to keep my cool and told her that we have never actually agreed on being exclusive, and even though I entertained the possibility that she could be seeing other people, agreed that we can not see each other anymore after what she told me, at least for now. That I had a great time with her and that she is really special to me, and many women are going to pass trough my life until I find someone who makes me feel like she does (first time I talk about feelings to her). Told her that she had my number and she can contact me in the future, but I am not going to be waiting for her. Wished her good luck and that's it. She then started telling me what an amazing guy I am, that she had great fun with me, thanked me a lot and yada yada yada. And agreed that maybe in the future....that feelings where confusing for her right now, etc. Sounded pretty sad actually but you cannot trust women.
And then I went NC. Planning to spin plates again, have some fun and maybe meet someone better. But man, feelings are still there and are going to be there for some time. And something seems off, I just can't stop thinking that this whole thing sounds weird. And this Chad came out of the blue. Maybe chad doesn't even exist and she made that up because she got afraid of potential commitment. Feels like a **** test. This was less than a week ago. I haven't contacted her nor I will. She broke it, she has to fix it if she wants to.
Anyway, spin plates, no contact, that is the only way for now. Do you think I played it cool? I'm actually sincerely not mad, I just find it childish and I am a little sad that I cannot enjoy being with her anymore.
Thanks for reading me!
