has anyone ever had a success story after really fvcking it up by losing your temper?

[pete101]

any success stories?

say you were getting flaked on by a girl and after the 2nd date she cancelled for the 4th time and u lost your temper and sent her a text telling her off for all the things she did wrong.

have they ever came back to you after a week of no contact or whatever?

if they did, did u judge them for giving you a 2nd chance or question why they did?

is no matter how much interest level she had in you if you f up after the 2nd date when you're relatively new to her have u ever managed to turn it around if u are unable to ever bump into them in person and had to rely on phone for your own source of contact?

 

[tincanman99]

Anger and losing your temper solves nothing. I did not reach this mindset till a few years ago. I used to get mad and would verbalize that anger. Do you know what it accomplishes?

NOTHING.

The reality is that it will make her feel bad and will no doubt upset her. All she is going to think is that you are a jerk. For her to go from the mindset that you are jerk to liking will be a stretch. Even though she may have warranted it, most of the time it solves little.

I have found that 99% with almost everything getting angry and lashing out makes you feel good at the moment and than later you regret doing it. There are definitely better ways to handle it.

It has to do with YOUR REACTION to her. Realize that you she is a living, breathing entity. You cannot possibly control her but you can CONTROL YOUR REACTION to her. You need to become indifferent and say so what. Whatever...

This girl blows you off 4 times? So what. Thats how you have to look at it. Its just not that important. This is not life or death. Back off, give her space and leave it be. But definitely dont tell her off. Just leave it be.

Women sense when they got you on the hook and it invites all kinds of bad behavior on their part because THEY ARE IN CONTROL. They know you want to sleep with them so they test the limits. They want to see how much you will tolerate and have a backbone. The right way to show her that this behavior is unacceptable is to withdraw your attention or tell her calmly - I am busy, if you want to meet. You let me know when. If she doesnt come back, than you know she just wasnt that into you in the first place.

Realize that the person who cares the least about a relationship of any kind is IN CONTROL. Be indifferent, have self confidence and be prepared to walk away without any nastiness.

 

[pete101]

i hear what you're saying because i could not understand why she'd jeopardize her chances with me after i told her again and again not to cancel cos i've given her all chances possible but by cancelling again and again.. even gave her one last one.. she took it for granted.

is the point that if you tell her off for her bad behaviour she'll just not respond to it and it's over?

it's almost as if she's trying to get a rise out of you after u repeatedly told her not to do that.. i was thinking she'd just punish me for a few days giving me silent treatment because she had such high interest level. they really do take the p1ss testing your breaking limits.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Dude, I told you, buy her flowers and tell her you love her and that she is special. Tell her she would be insane to keep ruining her chances with you, because you are a catch and you will only give her ONE MORE chance, and no more. If she flakes, it is over for her.

 

[pete101]

hahaha.. i don't remember you telling me that in my other thread.. but seriously you're joking about the love part. lol why on earth would i do that if i've only had 2 dates with her??

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Why on earth would you behave the way you are, and make multiple threads about the same girl and show your one-ities, if you weren't obsessed with this one?

Why aren't you spinning plates intead?

 

[ima str8 up pimp]

any success stories?

say you were getting flaked on by a girl and after the 2nd date she cancelled for the 4th time and u lost your temper and sent her a text telling her off for all the things she did wrong.

have they ever came back to you after a week of no contact or whatever?

if they did, did u judge them for giving you a 2nd chance or question why they did?

is no matter how much interest level she had in you if you f up after the 2nd date when you're relatively new to her have u ever managed to turn it around if u are unable to ever bump into them in person and had to rely on phone for your own source of contact?

I believe I can relate somewhat? I don't really understand what you're trying to say but I do have one story...

Once I dated this girl cait, beautiful prominent girl in my small hometown an hb9of 10 or so. Haha, I was completely impetuous and I laugh now because this was a few years past now...

I made her cry and dumped her at school and when I tried getting back with her she wouldn't look me in the eyes until recently.

We were at school and I saw her simply talking to a friend of mine in the hallway and I flipped sh!t, there was seriously something wrong in my head those days and up until about a year ago I have been getting better and maturing... but I screamed at her and made her cry and ran to the bathroom and kicked the stalls tried pulling my hair out, bloodied my knuckles... seriously no true reason other than self destruction at it's best.

 

[pete101]

Why on earth would you behave the way you are, and make multiple threads about the same girl and show your one-ities, if you weren't obsessed with this one?

Why aren't you spinning plates intead?

im trying my best but it's not been very successful, i tried a few approaches got no numbers so i can't really spin any plates if i dont have any yet.. it's not magic.

i knew i had a problem with this particular one because going into it i was in a rut with no options so i expected oneitis might f me over.. i was really tired to approaching girls with no success that i just wanted to chill out. i was on a roll about 6 weeks ago where i had 3 dates in 3 days and made out with all of them. but something went wrong and they wouldn't meet up again.. kept flaking and putting me in awkward position when i reconvened to try to make date arrangements again they wouldn't give me an answer so i lost them. my confidence went and i was down to bare bones.

didn't have a date for about 3-4 weeks after that, that didn't go well. she didnt want to see me anymore after that, we made out etc.

then 3 weeks after that it was this one.. i was tired of girls and dealing with them.. that even during dating this one i was so mentally drained i knew i had to get others but i was just so tired i couldn't handle it cos i just wanted 1 regular. it just happened to be she had really high interest in me that it went well cos going in i didn't think it would work because i had no options and low confidence. i was more surprised that she just happened to be really into me.

i still feel what she did was wrong and justified a telling off but i cant accept that someone who's had this high interest in me.. i've never had a girl this all over me before.. end up losing her.. it just baffles me..