"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Handling a womans indifference and creating challenge

salsipuedes

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I read this in another post:

"When a woman treats you with indifference, you challenge her."

I think this is a very very important part of dealing with women, because this is precisely what most men find difficult when dealing with them. Some men are so afraid of rejection that only a couple of signs of indifference from a female is all it takes to quit. Others are trown into the abyss of AFC doom, others get mad. Learning to handle a womans indifference and countering with challenge is in my opinion, the key to a succesful DJ and the key to getting the women you want.

Why do women show indiference? i think its a natual test that all females trow at prospective male partners to see wether they have the caracter to be succesful providers. I agree, this "test" comes from our animal past and is no longer valid in todays world where many shy and sociable impaired men are huge finacial succeses and can be good providers.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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ScrewIt

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Or, she's just not that into you...

But i guess it's always good to assume the best of the situation
 

Whyldchyld

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Or maybe she's just a dull person full stop. Some people look at life with their glasses half empty, even some really good looking women.
 

00Kevin

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Originally posted by salsipuedes
I read this in another post:

"When a woman treats you with indifference, you challenge her."

I think this is a very very important part of dealing with women, because this is precisely what most men find difficult when dealing with them. Some men are so afraid of rejection that only a couple of signs of indifference from a female is all it takes to quit. Others are trown into the abyss of AFC doom, others get mad. Learning to handle a womans indifference and countering with challenge is in my opinion, the key to a succesful DJ and the key to getting the women you want.

Why do women show indiference? i think its a natual test that all females trow at prospective male partners to see wether they have the caracter to be succesful providers. I agree, this "test" comes from our animal past and is no longer valid in todays world where many shy and sociable impaired men are huge finacial succeses and can be good providers.

This is exactly the problem I'm having with a chick right now.

I am the kind of guy to just get pissed off at it. i just don't have the time to stay around a chick like that when I can just date another girl on my list that isn't indifferent. when a girl is indifferent it makes her unattractive and I end up not wanting her.


Perhaps you should give us an example of a good challenge to counter it.
 

00Kevin

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"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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salsipuedes

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I am talking about indifference as a test, not because shes not interested, if shes not interested theres nothing you can do. Handling a womans indifference is the topic of this post, i have dated several women who seem cold and not interested at first, only to later show their true feelings, in fact, i am always surprised to hear from women i am dating, that they found me atractive when they 1st met me, yet they never showed it.
 

satyriasis

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the way to challenge it is...act indifferent right back. you should already be indifferent to any situation in the first place.
 

salsipuedes

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Originally posted by satyriasis
the way to challenge it is...act indifferent right back. you should already be indifferent to any situation in the first place.
I don't think you guys are getting me, lets see, lets pretend your at a party, and theres a beautiful woman that you find atractive, you get near her and you start a conversation with her, something simple, and she reacts indifferent to you. Now, many women act this way even do in the inside they are atracted to you, its a test, its her test to see what you are made of. How do you turn her indifference around in order for her to open up and stop testing you.
 

smoke city

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the way to challenge it is...act indifferent right back. you should already be indifferent to any situation in the first place.
That's a great idea. So you have two people who are totally indifferent to each other, and are not talking to each other, and so will never get to know each other. Just what you're looking for. :crackup:
 

Magnatolia

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I read a tip by David Deangelo for this type of situation.

If she acts cold/indifferent then say something like "I know a secret about you that no other guy who's only known you for a few minutes is aware of." pause for a second. "Deep down you're actually quite shy. You act cold/indifferent to hide your feelings. If someone says something hurtful you'll shrug it off, but in your mind you'll be thinking about it all the way home."

I've never actually tried this so some opinions would be good. The way I see it is you don't show indifference back. You need to call them up on their attitude.

Cheers
Maggs
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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