had encounter with NPD of 9 yrs in grocery store after 3 months of not seeing each other

[Lvdegen]

can't get into everything but known her for almost 9 years . i myself have strong npd traits from being spoiled my whole life and also being around her for such a long time...im a somatic and she s somatic a solid 9 etx. use to get messed up from her stupid sh1t for years until I researched and finally got everything under control. the blowups were kept to a bare minimum for years maybe one or two here and there but nothing crazy. she knows me I knowetc. basically best friends for years..we did f when we first met but npds diknt like intimacy so we became close...i was introduced to her parents and she would confide in me all the time etc etc. all the guys would try to get get but they can't handle her and get discarded. i stuck it out and have been the nearest and dearest.

sure I've done vengeful things to get her back but it's only fair lol. well about 4 months ago I met this girl (bpd/npd) who knows my NPD chick as aquintaces kind of roll in the same circles. bpd is a legit pornstar with 100k followers on ig and 200k on Twitter so she is known....could somewhat handle her probably better than most dudes thanks to the narcs experiences over the years..well i got fed up with the bpd and said f it. when we broke up one time bpd decides to call npd and ask her about me... never really said anything bad to bpd except that npd had npd...well bpd calls her and says god knows what then i get a text from npd saying shes done with me. i flip out on npd. i imagine bpd said i said she s npd and a few little things I mentioned such as when i was asked if she lived in so and so apartments and i just said yea. but that pretty much was it and and when npd was upset aboit some money situation and I was sitting there listening with 1000's in my pocket and was getting amused because of all the messed up stuff she has done so maybe that was mentioned have no clue but that stuff happened years ago.

so we haven't seen each other in 3 months and she actually lives around the corner from me..she moved to be closer to me actually after her lease was up. ..i texted her may be 3 or 4 times telling npd to get over it I didn't do anything If I did my bad we are suppose to be friends etc etc..well she s not having it and just ends up texting something she wpuild say to some dude trying to date (they emulate people from past encounters and mimic them beciss they don't have empathy so they just act like how they think a person would act in a situation depending on how they percieeve the person at the time) her like u need to accept and move on I'm not the one for you I'm with someone...i replied and said "um ur suppose to be saying that to dudes that r trying to do date u I'm not trying to date u were friends u fn kidding me" then im gonna block u and she does but I would text likke 2 weeks later and she would say the same exact sh1t so I wasn't blocked..yes they just want attention i know...last text was probably last week and last thing I said was get over it then do it if not then don't.

the reason why she isn't having it is because the bpd has more than her and kind of higher up on the food chain and npd feels hurt and inadequate not unique etc because I gsve my attention elsewhere and probably because the bpd is friends with an enemy of t he npd amd I was around her twice with the bpd..well bpd was fkng me and we were sleeping together everynight and she was hot so why wouldn't i..i knew if it got back to npd she would be devastst ed ..well it did...was it worth it..sure why not I guess lol. but bpd and me aren't talking anymore so now I'm like fkkkkk.

well tonight I decide to go to get ice cream i go to this one store I always go to. i leave and say u know what i want a burger and pull into carls jr...i say f it im going to just get a steak and cook it so I drive to this other store on the way home and i think to myself god wouldn't it be crazy if I ran into npd at the store tonight (close to where we live..i rarely go there may be 1 out 30 times i get food)...i get my steak walk to the self check out im first up see a girl in a skirt with nice hair standing 3 feet checking out her groceries... I'm like who tf is this hot b1tch? well she turns towards me and it's the npd low and behold.. there were a few people around so that obviously changed the interaction as opposed to nobody around..but she has npd and there have been times where we would run into each other in public and she would act like she barley knows me and this would be after a day of hanging out lol just weird stuff ..so at the store i said hey idiot kind of low she turned and said stalking me? and I laughed and said um ur stalking me. in my head I was sh1t should I try to hash things out right here right now at the store lol? or should I go outside so we can talk in private..both which aren't my style. so after i laugh and say no ur stalking me i walk over to the next check out lane I glance over to see and she s still scanning...i scan my steak pay and walk right out the door to my car and drive off.

i know she was thinking oh he's gonna wait outside to talk to me well she was wrong and I'm pretty sure she s baffled as to how i didn't...i didn't even text her anything either and not surprisingly she didn't text me..its happened before whe re we wouldn't talk then have an encounter where nothing is really said then end up making up. but this is by far the longest we've gone without seeing each other and talking besides those little exchanges.

never really seen her like this with me before except maybe oncefor 3 weeks because she found out I was hanging with a girl that pushed her in the club lol. we have a deep long past..shes able to act herself around me basically she will never find a replacement be cause I am the nearest and dearest...if u don't have a full understanding of npd then u probably won't get certain things.

the weirdest thing is there have been times where we wouldn't talk for a while then i would have a dream about her...then the next day she would text and that has happened multiple times...and tonight has blown me away..i said befor e to myself the only way would be for us to have a chance encounter in public becais e she isn't having it thru texts...so if we see each other face to face then that might alter things..i never think aboit oh maybe I'll see npd at so and so...just tonight I thought that and I never go to that store well low and behold. all of this is just so epic. just looked on her ig she had some post about being alone so u can grow blah blah blah lol..she acts like I'm her bf or stand in her way...i never stand in her way with any dude...npd are always alone because peoplle can't handle them or they get discarded.

 

[bigneil]

Did she dump you because she is mentally ill, or because you refuse to use capital letters?

 

[ku17]

These threads are the same thing, every time. You throw up a wall of text that reads as the stream of consciousness of an 18 year old. The only common denominator is that you insist on maintaining toxic relationships. You haven't listened to any of the advice that you have received on your previous walls of text so go and do whatever you want. Marry one, or both, of them. You're not looking for discussion, you want someone to validate your toxic behavior.

 

[bigneil]

Only 1.5% of women have NPD or BPD and 50% of the threads lately talk about them.

Meanwhile, my girlfriend was formally diagnosed with BPD - TWICE and never once did anything that I blamed on her having issues.

So to summarize:

1) A girl with BPD who is attracted will be your dream girl.
2) A girl without BPD who is not attracted will be a nightmare.

BPD can therefore be completely factored out of the equation - IT IS A NONFACTOR.

IT IS AN EXCUSE. And a remarkably unoriginal one. It's men acting like women who want to commiserate.

And now some assclown will sign up just to tell me "You wait and see! She'll do something you don't like some day!!"

 

[wifehunter]

 

[SmooveMooves]

Game = taking responsibility Psychiatry = claiming you are a victim.

Some of the stuff in this thread is just plain old women being women. She ignored you in public, and that is a sign she has NPD? She got jealous that you took your attention away instead to another woman? This makes one BPD and the other NPD? Come on man.

Its idiotic. Then we get all these armchair Mayoclinic psychiatrists who come in and validate this stupid shít. "Yeah man, BPDs are tough, you're lucky for sticking it out I escaped mine just 2 years ago...'

Such bizarre lenses through which to view the world.

Man, who're you telling?

Only 1.5% of women have NPD or BPD and 50% of the threads lately talk about them.

Npd is even rarer than that.

can't get into everything but known her for almost 9 years . i myself have strong npd traits from being spoiled my whole life and also being around her for such a long time...

Mental disorders are not infectious. You did not get 'NPD traits' from 'being around her.'


Mental disorders have been romanticized so much to the point that people desire them. People wanna be labeled as narcissists or bipolar because it means they are not like everyone else and are somehow special. Thanks to WebMD and Mayoclinic we now have a bunch of people running around self diagnosing themselves as narcissists and sociopaths. Little do they know that these disorders are dehabilitating, packed with high suicide rates and are uncurable. They want all the "look at me I'm sick," perks while somehow forgeting that if they truly were narcissitic, it is likely they'd end up on suicide watch.

And for you who want to claim that you are 'high functioning,' there is no such thing. Either your symptoms are severe enough to the point you have the disorder or you don't. Otherwise, Everyone should be considered a high functioning narcissist.

 

[Dingo]

Did she dump you because she is mentally ill, or because you refuse to use capital letters?

Lol... You owe me a new keyboard....

 

[Julian]

i actually read all that and from what i can tell OP actually enjoys this cat an mouse game these sloots like to play lol. what great is that he doesn't seem to be taking any of this personal. either way i dont understand the point of this thread. good job?

 

[Lvdegen]

Did she dump you because she is mentally ill, or because you refuse to use capital letters?

because I typed the whole thing on my phone jack@$$

 

[bigneil]

because I typed the whole thing on my phone jack@$$

This OP took you AT LEAST thirty minutes to type - so you have time to ramble on and on but not capitalize??

 

[bigneil]

Mental disorders have been romanticized so much to the point that people desire them. People wanna be labeled as narcissists or bipolar because it means they are not like everyone else and are somehow special.

This is very true.

Back in March, during our 6th month of dating (while at the meeting place) my girl said "I was diagnosed with BPD" and I said "You do NOT have BPD!" and she said "Yes I do!!" as if she wanted to.

She has never shown any bad signs. We complete our 9th month of dating today.

 

[resilient]

What are you looking for from us, OP? Sympathy? This forum is split. You have guys that will validate what you've been through. Then there are others guys who cut through the BS and realize their DJ game wasn't as tight as they had originally thought while most external behavior from the plate can be chalked up to low interest.

I'm in the camp that doesn't believe every woman walking out there has a personality disorder. Sure, there are facets of crappy traits or "shadows" of a mental health disorder, yet we should not all be self-entitled shrinks walking around diagnosing and psycho-analyzing every woman we cross paths with.

There are two sides to every coin in a set or a relationship. You own up to your part, and she owns up to hers. If she doesn't who cares. Let your ethos come from the objective rationale of the Don Juan.

Game the next plate and move on whether it's 9 days, 9 weeks, 9 months, or 9 years. It's all relative.

 

[bigneil]

Let's put this in perspective: if 98.5% of women do NOT have BPD, finding a BPD is as rare as finding a HB9.9!

 

[SadoMasochrist]

Its idiotic. Then we get all these armchair Mayoclinic psychiatrists who come in and validate this stupid shít. "Yeah man, BPDs are tough, you're lucky for sticking it out I escaped mine just 2 years ago...'


Mental disorders are not infectious. You did not get 'NPD traits' from 'being around her.'

And for you who want to claim that you are 'high functioning,' there is no such thing. Either your symptoms are severe enough to the point you have the disorder or you don't. Otherwise, Everyone should be considered a high functioning narcissist.

Don't care to debate much here but both of these are wrong.

High functioning and low functioning designate essentially the ability to regulate their disorder to the degree it is possible, usually only in circumstances that absolutely require it (like a job). My pet theory is that it is correlated with IQ. As in, highly intelligent people with PDs, are usually high functioning. They hide it better. For instance, having a well paying job as an NPD in sales or as an executive would not be hard. They could still manage to pay their bills and have friends by way of their social circles being narcissistic. But if you took that person and dropped them in a role as say a nurse and lower their IQ, they would explode their whole world.

Narcissism isn't simply selfishness. And what you're debating is already a discussion point in many psychiatry papers. Which is that society at large, is beginning to be narcissistic. Now you might ask, why is this relevant?

Well, because the influence of society is no different than a long term mate. In recovery circles, they refer to these as "fleas." They are the remnants or "baggage" from being in a toxic relationship.

PDs are rare, but don't forget these forums are full of narcissists. I'd wager many or most of the guys that are big into this stuff are, and cluster-bs attract each other.

Rare I think are guys on here without family issues or psychiatric issues. Most of the "learning curve" guys are in here for is because they lack empathy. They're trying to learn how to mimic behavior that is ingrained and innate to neuro-typical guys. Lots of guys here raised by single mothers. And wouldn't you know, that's a huge predictor of developing cluster-b issues.

Long story short, I think your view is correct, at large, but here in seduction communities, it's a hot spot of cluster-b nutcases dating cluster-b nutcases.

 

[bigneil]

Don't care to debate much here but both of these are wrong.
I'd wager many or most of the guys that are big into this stuff are...

There you have it, folks! If you don't believe that 50% of our girls are in the 1.5 percentile of insane women, YOU are declared insane by the same armchair psycho-logists!

Reminds me of Stalin's Russia where if you didn't believe in Communism, you were declared insane and murdered. We haven't quite got to Pol Pot's murdering all teachers and intellectuals, but many pro-welfare, pro-BPD members here are pining for just that.

 

[SadoMasochrist]

There you have it, folks! If you don't believe that 50% of our girls are in the 1.5 percentile of insane women, YOU are declared insane by the same armchair psycho-logists!

Reminds me of Stalin's Russia where if you didn't believe in Communism, you were declared insane and murdered. We haven't quite got to Pol Pot's murdering all teachers and intellectuals, but many pro-welfare, pro-BPD members here are pining for just that.

You need to take stats again.

If you have a forum that is rife with NPD males, a significant portion will have cluster-b partners. And even if they weren't paired 1:1, the percentage of people in the cluster-b, is around 10%. So honestly, 50% wouldn't be outrageous if even 30% of the users here are NPD males.

The PUA techniques using push\pull and validation are primarily most effective on women with attachment disorders. Push\pull and validation game fails on high self esteem women.

A lot of the guys who think a woman is BPD probably just have a woman who has an attachment disorder.

Anyways, lots of overlap.

Don't know why I bother replying to your posts since you're devoid of anything of value other than talking yourself up and ego-defenses.

 

[SmooveMooves]

High functioning and low functioning designate essentially the ability to regulate their disorder to the degree it is possible, usually only in circumstances that absolutely require it (like a job).

Correct. These are distinctions in actual psychiatry usually given to those who "successfully" manage their disorder. My sentiments were referring to those who self diagnose themselves as high functioning (insert their favorite disorder here) in order to identify as having a disorder without really identifying as having a disorder.

My pet theory is that it is correlated with IQ. As in, highly intelligent people with PDs, are usually high functioning. They hide it better. For instance, having a well paying job as an NPD in sales or as an executive would not be hard. They could still manage to pay their bills and have friends by way of their social circles being narcissistic.

I agree.

PDs are rare, but don't forget these forums are full of narcissists.

Says who? Why would you make this assumption? I'm confused on how you got there. Again, PDs are rare, however, NPD is even more so with fewer than 200,000 cases annually in the U.S. For perspective, there are 321.4 MILLION people that live in the U.S. Given this fact there isn't really much to debate.

I'd wager many or most of the guys that are big into this stuff are, and cluster-bs attract each other.

I'd wager most guys here are actually socially awkward dudes operating from a scarcity mindset who don't quite grasp social cues, calibration, charm and laws of attraction and power.

Long story short, I think your view is correct, at large, but here in seduction communities, it's a hot spot of cluster-b nutcases dating cluster-b nutcases.

Even still in the seduction community I'd doubt it. Its more likely its simply unsociable dudes dating bad/incompatible/ chicks. However, I understand your standpoint. Discussion is always good. Agree to disagree.

 

[SadoMasochrist]

Correct. These are distinctions in actual psychiatry usually given to those who "successfully" manage their disorder. My sentiments were referring to those who self diagnose themselves as high functioning (insert their favorite disorder here) in order to identify as having a disorder without really identifying as having a disorder.



I agree.



Says who? Why would you make this assumption? I'm confused on how you got there. Again, PDs are rare, however, NPD is even more so with fewer than 200,000 cases annually in the U.S. For perspective, there are 321.4 MILLION people that live in the U.S. Given this fact there isn't really much to debate.



I'd wager most guys here are actually socially awkward dudes operating from a scarcity mindset who don't quite grasp social cues, calibration, charm and laws of attraction and power.



Even still in the seduction community I'd doubt it. Its more likely its simply unsociable dudes dating bad/incompatible/ chicks. However, I understand your standpoint. Discussion is always good. Agree to disagree.

I can temper my view more. This forum is more blue pill. When I speak of seduction communities, I'm a red piller at heart. I'd say my view is most accurate at the red pill. There are plenty of blue pill guys here, and I'd say it's pretty hard to be blue pill and NPD. It seems to follow that the angriest dudes are aware of the fact that they can't win the game with women outright. Also I'd say very few people ever get to the point of being diagnosed with NPD.

They just live out their pathology. Go on the become dysfunctional sales guys and other predators. They blend in mostly in the mess we've created of the world. Just like BPD women seem to blend in until you go too long with them.

It's take a lot for someone to get to a point in their relationship where they find out something is seriously wrong. Where you see a partner do the equivalent of 2+2 = zebra.

You take a step back and go "what is going on here?"

I'm posting this as someone in the cluster-b, I can spot others here. Bigneil is most certain, deeply ego-syntonic as an NPD. The fact he's in his 40s and still doesn't understand his behavior is ridiculous is very telling. Other users have called me out in the past on my journey to being healthier.

Just saying, we're on here. We gravitate to this stuff, to systems, and how to exploit them.

 

[Lvdegen]

Game = taking responsibility for yourself.

Psychiatry = claiming you are a victim.

Some of the stuff in this thread is just plain old women being women. She ignored you in public, and that is a sign she has NPD? She got jealous that you took your attention away instead to another woman? This makes one BPD and the other NPD? Come on man.

Such bizarre lenses through which to view the world.

Who even cares what they all have? Some women aren't right for you in a serious relationship. So don't try to force one on them. Problem solved.

Let's put this in perspective: if 98.5% of women do NOT have BPD, finding a BPD is as rare as finding a HB9.9!

listen I live in vegas people here are truly fked up and I've met normal girls and have met girls that arent..they are good looking single alot of the time true hustlers who have a checkered past with major family issues you act like u know or have interacted with them..i have self study personality disorders for 6 years so I know when someone is messed up in the head or not. I've dealt with huge manipulators that are strippers escorts porn stars some of them have messed with a list celebs or their spouses and i know this for a fact u name it but I'm pretty sure you've been in contact with the same with jyst as many since u live in a hustlers paradise like vegas right?

 

[Lvdegen]

Only 1.5% of women have NPD or BPD and 50% of the threads lately talk about them.

Meanwhile, my girlfriend was formally diagnosed with BPD - TWICE and never once did anything that I blamed on her having issues.

So to summarize:

1) A girl with BPD who is attracted will be your dream girl.
2) A girl without BPD who is not attracted will be a nightmare.

BPD can therefore be completely factored out of the equation - IT IS A NONFACTOR.

IT IS AN EXCUSE. And a remarkably unoriginal one. It's men acting like women who want to commiserate.

And now some assclown will sign up just to tell me "You wait and see! She'll do something you don't like some day!!"

this is about a full blown npd not a bpd...the bpd was just the one that threw a wrench in between me and the npd..you act like u know the npd or the bpd like you've been around or seen either of them...the bpd is on meds under a doctor and the npd is a pathological narc to the max..shell eat u up alive. you think ur hot sh1t or something...youre on this forum 24/7 u r constantly posting responses...you have no life but u act like ur in the mix...no dude that is in the mix with all these girls as u so claim are not on sosuave as much as u buddy ur fake and putting up a front other posters may not realize that because they svck ur little d1ck but I know what is really up with u and I'm sure others on here do to.