It's common scientific knowledge that you remember and learn best the more ways you relate to something. If someone tells you about a new whatever you will remember the gist of it, if you go and talk about it, you will remember even more, and if you go and experience what they're talking about you will remember nearly everything. For the longest time I was convinced I was literell retarted, at least mildly so, because I had such a terrible time remembering things. Many days I couldn't remember what I did the day before, what I ate, who I spoke to, or what I had to do next. This was because I was not immersing myself in life. Life was so boring and meaningless that I just floated through not absorbing a thing. My IQ is high, almost at the genius level, but I've cheated myself of knowledge and memorable experience. I had no framework to build upon. No conversation ideas, not even enough ideas to fill a day with activities. I would literally sit there in front of the computer looking at the same website (no, not porn...) all day because it didn't occure to me to turn on the tv, go exercise, study, or whatever. The times I had done all of those things I was in the wrong mindset, not being interesting, and they never formed positive memories. As such, they were the last things to come to mind when I was bored.
I'm convinced that people fill their days by following habit. And that once you have habits established everything comes automatically and without maintenance. Now that I have a gf, I no longer have to think about what to say or do to keep her interested. I have almost a year of experience with her and relating to her is second nature. If we ever break up, it will be almost second nature to relate to other girls as well. Our goal should be to create this familiarity with all aspects of life.
Habits don't have to be singular. You don't want to habitually do the same thing every single time, you want options. When I'm bored I want to have 10 ideas pop into my head. At first you're just going to get one idea, then a week later two, and so on until you never have trouble finding something to do.
The catch-22 for me was socializing. Because I had no ideas, I couldn't socialize. And I couldn't socialize so I had trouble obtaining new ideas. Here's a little story. I didn't start drinking until probably 5 years after the majority of people. I didn't know Coors from Absolute. One time, I was told to get some beer and I got non-alcoholic, not even knowing such a thing existed. That was fun...and it meant I didn't buy beer again for that crowd.
Anyways, I think I'm starting to ramble. The epiphany for me in life was when I realized that most people are genuinly good. If you ask for help, they will provide it. If you're bored, just tell someone cool that you want to learn how to have fun. Chances are they'll show you. THE BIGGEST HABIT WE SHOULD HAVE IS TO ASK FOR HELP.
I'm convinced that people fill their days by following habit. And that once you have habits established everything comes automatically and without maintenance. Now that I have a gf, I no longer have to think about what to say or do to keep her interested. I have almost a year of experience with her and relating to her is second nature. If we ever break up, it will be almost second nature to relate to other girls as well. Our goal should be to create this familiarity with all aspects of life.
Habits don't have to be singular. You don't want to habitually do the same thing every single time, you want options. When I'm bored I want to have 10 ideas pop into my head. At first you're just going to get one idea, then a week later two, and so on until you never have trouble finding something to do.
The catch-22 for me was socializing. Because I had no ideas, I couldn't socialize. And I couldn't socialize so I had trouble obtaining new ideas. Here's a little story. I didn't start drinking until probably 5 years after the majority of people. I didn't know Coors from Absolute. One time, I was told to get some beer and I got non-alcoholic, not even knowing such a thing existed. That was fun...and it meant I didn't buy beer again for that crowd.
Anyways, I think I'm starting to ramble. The epiphany for me in life was when I realized that most people are genuinly good. If you ask for help, they will provide it. If you're bored, just tell someone cool that you want to learn how to have fun. Chances are they'll show you. THE BIGGEST HABIT WE SHOULD HAVE IS TO ASK FOR HELP.