Guys, I am tired, and honestly, I think I am about to quit

[Mr. Cardio]

From being on this site, I first came here seeking information on how to attract women to me. I learned that being an afc or a nice guy was not the way to go. I later learned as to why women were attracted to the jerks and or thugs, and it was because they embraced and had a lot of testerone and could control it in a way that would make a woman horny. I seem to be a little confused. I work out regularly, I have a lot of testereone. I know I am a don juan, because I am chasing my passion in life, I am always happy and full of positive energy. However, I do not get any dates. I go to the club, I only get grinding sessions, and no one night stands, and I can go out and collect numbers and set up dates all day, and still get no dates. My overall response from women is laughter. Not the laughter that this guy is so cool, I mean, that kind happens some time, but most of the time, I get the laughter as in, I am a joke. Thats all I get. And please don’t tell me to do more cold approaches, I have a life, and I do cold approaches all the time. I use great eye contact, and I consider myself to be a don juan, I just don’t understand, theres seems to be an invisible wall up between me and women, and it would not matter if I was a don juan, an afc, a karate kid, or a damn james bond, nothing would still not go anywhere. I don’t understand this. Now that I have transformed my thinking and everything into a don juan, I believe I DESERVE beautiful women in my life, and I have no god damn problem going up and chattin with them. But does it go anywhere, no. Nowhere. Absolutely nowhere, hell, I don’t even get dates anymore. At least when I was an afc, I was getting dates. Overall, I am a don juan, but a don juan, that women are not attracted to. I don’t understand.....seriously, and I am frustrated, because I have goals. Finanical, spiritual, health, career, and personal ones. Does it makes since to have all my goals completed, but my personal goals be fvcked up. Do I NEED women, no, but do I WANT women, hell yes. Am I going to kiss azz, hell no. Am I going to be an afc, hell no. I like being a don juan, not because it supposedly brings me women, but I feel a lot better about myself. The problem is, women are one of my goals, and there is still a wall there, how to I break it. It seems like because I am a don juan, THAT is why, I am not getting girls. But when I was an afc, I actually had better results! I swear, I am not lying.

 

[Mr. Cardio]

Let me add this also, because I know someone will bring it up, c and f, challenge, and mystery, have been the major additions I have added to my personality. But, I still come off as a joke. My convos are simple, I throw in the c and f, most of the time she is talkin, convo is light, no serious topics, we all have a great time, but it still goes no where. I still notice, because I am black, most of our girls still like the thuggish types. Do they have more testerone, or is there something else going on. I am lost, because how can a don juan NOT be attractive? I am a don juan, why am I not going anywhere with women.

 

[Hurrican]

so how many girls rejected you or faked out?

Is there any possible reason why you are not getting girls except that gay "imaginery wall"

You might be gay...

Put ur pic on hotornot.com and see what the rating is.

 

[Mr. Cardio]

Well I dunno how to put a pic on here cause I dont have a scanner or a cell phone. How many girls will flake, just about all of them. Like I said, it never goes into something serious. One time, I went out and gotten over 100 phone numbers in about a month and a halfs time, just simple and easy. How many dates did I go on, none. but, I am a don juan, and that is why this is confusing. Hell if I am an afc, THEN, I would understand, now, I am lost.

 

[Alphathree]

First of all, consider using paragraphs in the future.

I get the sense that you're trying too hard.

People have all of these complex openers and tactics and bull****. Just stop. Breathe. Relax.

Look, do you know how I approach a woman?

I walk into her general vicinity. Usually I've already got an IOI of some kind because I display high value beforehand.

I don't turn my body language toward her, just my head.

Over my shoulder, I say, "hi." with a smile.

If she doesn't engage, I move on, because I'm the one evaluating her.

Now look, I really _am_ the one evaluating her because I really do have choices.., whereas you're going to have to fake your selectiveness.

I'm rambling.

You can't get women by being some jackass with a bunch of lines.

If you're trying to do cold approaches, you're making things hard on yourself.

I pull all of my women from my own social circles by displaying high value/social proof. Consider doing the same.

The best thing you can do is lean back. WAY BACK. You're so focused on outcomes and dates and all of this bull s-h-i-t.

Relllllllaaaaaaax when you interact with women.

When I'm talking to a girl, I always have a sly smile, I never talk about myself, and I take my damned time.

I never snap my head. I response slowly. I don't use a lot of words. I don't um and ah. I keep my body language in check until she earns my attention.

Sometimes you guys on this board make things so, so, so hard on yourselves.

Women will pursue YOU if you have a high social value. Then all you need to do is be laid back and take her where you want.

I never, ever, ever, EVER get rejected. Ever.

All of this "get ready to fail" is crap.

OBSERVE the woman you're talking to. If she's not engaged in your conversation, drop it and forget about it.

You'll know when she's ready for you.

I'm repeating the same points here.

Lean back. That's what you need to do right now. Chill out.

 

[BackToTheMack]

I got a 7.7 on hot or not. Man honestly this site is good but it has its limitations there is so much contradicting information. I had my first look at the DJ bible and it doesnt make any sence (i like pook's stuff) but anyway the DJ bible has a lot of contradictions.

If you want real help PM me and il help u out. Being and AFC will get you nowere.

 

[tmpgstx]

karate kid ..lol. Focus on your body language more. Stick your chest out a bit to form a better posture, and change your voice tonality once and awhile.

You don't have to do C&F. Be comfortable and confident with yourself. Enjoy yourself.

It's true that women can read the 'emotional temperature' of a room or someone they're talking with. It's like a thermometer, and if you come across geniune and without an act, you'll do much better.

My guess is you're trying to hard with the C&F etc., and they're picking up on this. Let it come more naturally.

 

[Alphathree]

Originally posted by Mr. Cardio
Well I dunno how to put a pic on here cause I dont have a scanner or a cell phone. How many girls will flake, just about all of them. Like I said, it never goes into something serious. One time, I went out and gotten over 100 phone numbers in about a month and a halfs time, just simple and easy. How many dates did I go on, none. but, I am a don juan, and that is why this is confusing. Hell if I am an afc, THEN, I would understand, now, I am lost.

Don't put your picture on hotornot. This has nothing to do with looks. Don't let yourself believe otherwise.

Here's the thing about "C&F". If you memorize lines without inner game, you'll come off as trying too hard.

If you have the inner game, the C&F will come naturally. Remember it's a spice not a main course.

Once again, you make it SO complicated and it's just not necessary.

I can get a girl hooked on me in like twelve words. It doesn't matter WHAT the twelve words are.

"Hi."
"Hey there."
"I'm Alphathree."
"I'm CuteGirl."
"Hi CuteGirl."

There. That's open, attract, and qualify. Right there.

At this point CuteGirl is giving me the puppy dog look like "I love you"

I AM NOT AN ATTRACTIVE GUY. I dress well and take care of myself, but that's it.

Do you know what the difference is? My body language. My social status. My tone of voice. The speed at which I talk. The strength of my reality.

Good luck on your path.

 

[Mr. Cardio]

Alpha three, I just dont know man. A lot of people know me man, I have social proof, social value, everything. Women just seem to take me as some joke, I dont get it. Am I trying to hard, hell no. Do I use pick up lines, hell no. I should not even call it a cold approach, I see a girl I want, I go up to her, start a convo bout anything, when get the talkin, I set up a date, and thats what I have been doin lately, cause the number thing does not work. I am not trying to make this hard, I believe this should be easy, I just dont understand why its just not working for me. Every damn thing you just said about relaxation, etc, I already do that shyt. THAT, THAT, THAT, is why I am confused. It would seem like, if I did not have social value and proof, etc, then I would be having problems. I dunno.

 

[BackToTheMack]

listen to what i f**kin said

 

[tmpgstx]

There's your problem. You're going up to girls you don't even know yet and asking them for dates. It doesn't work. Find some in your circles that you already know, or one that you'll see often and get knowing her.

 

[Alphathree]

Originally posted by Mr. Cardio
Alpha three, I just dont know man. A lot of people know me man, I have social proof, social value, everything. Women just seem to take me as some joke, I dont get it. Am I trying to hard, hell no. Do I use pick up lines, hell no. I should not even call it a cold approach, I see a girl I want, I go up to her, start a convo bout anything, when get the talkin, I set up a date, and thats what I have been doin lately, cause the number thing does not work. I am not trying to make this hard, I believe this should be easy, I just dont understand why its just not working for me. Every damn thing you just said about relaxation, etc, I already do that shyt. THAT, THAT, THAT, is why I am confused. It would seem like, if I did not have social value and proof, etc, then I would be having problems. I dunno.

High social status means that everyone in the room, men and women, look up to and respect you for whatever reason(s).

I dunno, I'd have to see you interacting to really nail what your problem or problems are.

Just remember, the path to mastery involves a lot of plateaus.

I think about the way I interacted with women six months ago and realize I was a jackass.

I was pushing them away with horrible C&F. It was funny and exciting but it wasn't creating a connection.

I was trying waaaaaaay too hard.

I only see that in retrospect.

Anyway, I was on that plateau for a while, but I just keep plugging away at it.

If you'd like help understand what's wrong with your game, you might try ideaGasms.

There's a guy named Stephane who will show you why David D's philosophy is flawed because it's entirely fear based. He really cleared some of the bull**** out of my head.

http://www.ideagasms.com/

You'll have to read around his stuff about bisexuality and sex and get his core message, which is plain to see.

You're thinking of women too much as objects, as things to be conquered.

Women are very different creatures, and some of them are capable of very mean and hurtful things.

But there are beautiful women out there... beautiful on the inside too. Look into her eyes and see that lonely little girl that just wants a man to show her beauty.

If this sounds like bull**** to you, maybe you're not ready for this advice yet.

Stephane likes to say "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear."

 

[BackToTheMack]

A guy I know approaches girls everywhere jumps into there personal space (personal space is an arms away from you) and touches and tells them he wants to kiss the.

Then he wonders why it won’t work.....

I tell him there are a few basic rules to any approaches. When approaching a stranger you got to:

1) Respect their personal space (stay and arms length away)

2) No kino right off the bat (kino should wait)

3) Body language should show openness & friendliness not neediness or domination and obviously not intimidation

4) Don’t have a big smile on your face the whole time but then again don’t keep a straight face the entire time

5) If you are going to give a compliment say it right at the start and only once.

6) Don’t come up with a big pickup line a simple "Hi" will do.

7) Have a good voice tone dont sound rushed and nervous.

 

[tmpgstx]

Well put AlphaThree. I can tell you we're on the same page coming to the same conclusions. After over a year of introspection, behaving in the manners we mentioned makes a huge difference.

I always had one night stands that turned into relationships. My problem was no relationship was built before it ever got started. I had to go to the drawing board and figure out how to relate before the relationship, and how construct one from there so to speak.

You really can use logic to your advantage.

 

[Mr. Cardio]

someone please help me, i dont wanna go out like this.

 

[JonJack]

Originally posted by Mr. Cardio
someone please help me, i dont wanna go out like this.

No one can help you. Look around. You've been reading and applying all that this site preaches but you're still at a loss. What happens when something like this happens? Does it mean that there's some conspiracy against you because everything should be working and you should be getting some?

Everything isn't laid out for all of us in nicely formatted pieces that fit perfectly to make a picture that we've been dreaming of. Sometimes things work out the way we expected it to. Other times they don't.

Here comes the hard part. YOU will have to figure it out. YOU will have to be the one doing all the experiments. YOU will be the one coming to your own conclusions. YOU have to understand your own predicament because it's yours. It's a personal part of yourself and you expect other people to be able to help you decipher it?

Look. You're clearly confused. So what you need to do is experiment and experience things differently. If being a DJ isn't working, then experiment with your AFC ways. Maybe you could try mixing it up a bit. Maybe you could ask other people why you seem to be a joke. Maybe you could be doing so many other things to find the answers.

In life, we are the ones that should be living it. So what if we fail with girls because we were AFC? We learn from it and better ourselves. And I stress on LEARN.

 

[everywomanshero]

It's very simple

Look, I'm only an 8 on hotornot. That means 20% of men in the world look better than I do. I don't have any rich uncles to borrow a fancy car from.
I probably don't have any material or look advantages over most guys on this site. Just about anytime I go out I can get girls iinterested. Last weekend, I met different girls every night. I was even meeting girls when out on a date.

I really don't believe trying to act like James Bond is going to do anything other than make you come across as a big dork.
Deangelo does have some good stuff like nicknaming women that works really well online. When a woman starts to lose interest, sometimes you can get her number using that trick. I haven't listened to much of his material, but the few things I've tried seem to work better online than in person. I can't help but wonder if this guy does a lot of online seduction as a result.

A lot of stuff on this site is also wishful thinking or rambling that can be safely ignored. Listening to some guy ramble for 200,000 words about life in the Paleolithic era is not required just to pick up women. if you want to become a very high level player then you'll need to treat this as a game and be willing to fail. If you simply want a gf, go to some college parties and just talk to women. Find something about her and comment on it after a few sentences of casual conversation. Don't kiss her ass. I'm saying say something is interesting and get her talking about it, like her ring. That's it. If she walks, start another convo with someone else. Stop the james bond crap and any other weird ideas you may have gotten off this site.

 

[skeeloo]

clint eastwood not james bond lol.

youv got good advice cardio all the guys here gave good advice too you.what u do with it is up to u
and for godsakes leave hot or not. its insecurity that makes ppl post pics there.
i dont need no ones approval. post your pic here on how you dress maybe we can help you.

 

[everywomanshero]

One more thing...

When I was a kid, I got beat up one day. It was a very, very close fight. I started wrestling afterwards. We fought again and when I tried the new techniques, they didn't work at all. After a full year of wrestling, I got into a fight with this same guy again and I could take him down, punish him, let him up only to do0it all over again. The techniques were the same, but I could make them work now.

I was in a little better shape, but the main difference is the techniques didn't work until they were basically a reflex of mine. I could've gotten on some wrestling site and said the techniques were crap. However, the REAL problem was that I had not practiced them long enough.

I later found the same to be true in many aspects of life. I suggest you stop placing so much value on the immediate results and concentrate on long term results.

If you continue on the path of learning, you'll eventually become extremely good with women. You'll probably end up being one of the best in whatever city you live in. If you are attached to the results of every approach, then you'll get discouraged and quit before you ever even had a chance to refine your technique.

No one can do it for you. It's up to you from here on out. I also suggest you find some guys who already have this stuff down and go out with them. I don't know where you live, but if you ever get to St. Louis look me up.

 

[MacDiddy]

So what are you waiting for... JUST QUIT!!!

We are not your mummy and you know that