You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
I'm going for a casual outfit for dating.What are we talking here?
But I rather wear something that doesn't have unattractive vibe/connotations, like a varsity jacket or a cardigan (associated with nice guys). So I thought if there are second layer clothes that have unattractive vibe/connotations, therefore most likely there must be clothing with attractive vibe/connotations that can be worn as a second layer in 3 layer outfit and I'm clueless about what second layer clothing gives of attractive vibes, therefore I'm asking you guys if you knowAs long as you don't dress like a 12-year-old, you can combine whatever you want.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Would you please post a picture of a good looking trending Sweater, because I don't know what you consider a good looking trending Sweater.For cool to cold weather - good looking trending Sweater. The right ones can be and go with casual jeans and jacket or dress slacks and sport coat…
Google mens clothing trends Fall 2020 and see if you like anything…Would you please post a picture of a good looking trending Sweater, because I don't know what you consider a good looking trending Sweater.
And women don't?Men have to decide for themselves on their own unique style.
Depending on the weather you could go for a crewneck pullover + casual shirt combination. It's really not that complicated. Pullovers and shirts are always classy. If you live in a warm area you can also wear polo shirts. Sweatshirts are always timeless, as long as they're basic. No printed designs. Small brand logo on the chest tops.I'm going for a casual outfit for dating.
But I rather wear something that doesn't have unattractive vibe/connotations, like a varsity jacket or a cardigan (associated with nice guys). So I thought if there are second layer clothes that have unattractive vibe/connotations, therefore most likely there must be clothing with attractive vibe/connotations that can be worn as a second layer in 3 layer outfit and I'm clueless about what second layer clothing gives of attractive vibes, therefore I'm asking you guys if you know![]()
I'm thankful for advice and I don't want to appear rude. I want to explain that I'm going for a sexy vibe, as a classy vibe causes women to perceive you more as a provider type rather than lover. Classic and timeless doesn't always mean attractive to women, does it? Also, aren't polo shirts are "nice guy" attire, associated with people women hate so much?Pullovers and shirts are always classy.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Everything you've said in this post is completely baseless. Not the fact that you don't like the styles I recommended. That's something you choose for yourself. But thinking that a specific style makes you radiate "lover" or "nice guy" vibes is false. It's the way you wear those clothes. Classic and timeless is a clean slate that goes with anything and leaves you room for your own personality.I'm thankful for advice and I don't want to appear rude. I want to explain that I'm going for a sexy vibe, as a classy vibe causes women to perceive you more as a provider type rather than lover. Classic and timeless doesn't always mean attractive to women, does it? Also, aren't polo shirts are "nice guy" attire, associated with people women hate so much?
Here we disagree. I think that people associate clothing with different things and one of those things is people who wear them the most often. For example many people associate varsity jackets with jocks, kegstands and these jackets have a juvenile vibe since they are associated with highschool, highschool students and dumb and rude people, latter association was formed thanks to TV-series.Everything you've said in this post is completely baseless.
So clothing that makes you look like a bad guy doesn't looks more sexy to women than clothing that makes you look like a nerd or a dad? I don't think so.But thinking that a specific style makes you radiate "lover" or "nice guy" vibes is false.
Ok, sure. Can you help me solve it?This sounds like a math problem to me.
You just don't get it, that's the problem. I'll make it crystal clear with this comment.Here we disagree. I think that people associate clothing with different things and one of those things is people who wear them the most often. For example many people associate varsity jackets with jocks, kegstands and these jackets have a juvenile vibe since they are associated with highschool, highschool students and dumb and rude people, latter association was formed thanks to TV-series.
So clothing that makes you look like a bad guy doesn't looks more sexy to women than clothing that makes you look like a nerd or a dad? I don't think so.
I completely understand your viewpoint now, @HyenaPrince . I thank you for your effort to help me. I realize that I won't get advice that I need, because you don't believe that different clothes give off different vibes. So I recommend that you agree to disagree and apply your knowledge somewhere where it would be more useful, as it would save you time, since I don't think I can gain the advice that I need because of the reason I mentioned previously. But thank you for bothering to reply to my post at all![]()
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I'm not saying they are a deciding factor in what vibe you're giving off, your personality and intelligence is. But then you first approach a person, they gonna make assumptions about you based on what you're wearing, among other things, and what you're wearing is going to be a large factor in what they believe about you, and what they believe about you is going to decide if they want to see you again or not and in what way (friend, lover or something else?). People are going to assume different things about you if you approach them in a business suit or skinny jeans+ t-shirt+leather jacket+chelsea boots all of the later pieces of clothing being in black.Let me clarify the issue we're both have been dancing around for the last few comments. I'm saying clothes don't decide what vibe you're giving off (lover, nice guy, badass). You're saying they do.
I totally agree with you. Clothes can't make you a better person, they just can make you look better and make people assume things about you the first time you meet them.Yep, there’s an old saying invented and used last century by the companies trying to sell you clothing:
‘Clothes make the man’
It’s a lie designed to put you in the buying something to make you a better person mindset.
It couldn’t be further from the truth…
It's not that I don't have confidence, it's just that I want to maximize my chances.Welcome aboard.
While clothes can provide a bit of a short-cut for making a (so-called) 'good impression' ... it's also a bit of a short-sell upon ourselves.
It's like not having enough self-belief. And so, in order to feel better about oneself, the trend-follower has to rely on stitches of cloth.
Do women find men who differentiate themselves from the pack in how they dress in a sane, healthy way more attractive than men who wear clothing that has attractive vibe/connotations and have their own style? If so, then why?You probably do not want some dime-a-dozen girl and so you'll also want to come across as someone that also differentiates themselves from the pack.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.