Grumpy Attitude

GetBetter

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 17, 2013
Messages
156
Reaction score
8
Hey folks, I'll directly get to point.

I feel there's a lot of pent up anger and frustration in me and I have no idea how to solve it. I become grumpy and bitter towards everyone - less cheerful and serious. At one point I asked myself - Do I even know how to have fun? All my life all I have ever been doing is making attempts to fix my life to match my imagined life. Always working, always seemingly doing right thing. Not only I didnt get results I feel I never became a normal person either.

I tried meditation but it doesn't seem to help much. What do I do? All this emotional conflict is leading to Pre Mature Aging(is that a word?), Bad Confidence Levels, Pessimism, Being Fragile and Stifled.

No more!
 

daproest1

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 26, 2019
Messages
213
Reaction score
52
Age
31
Hey folks, I'll directly get to point.

I feel there's a lot of pent up anger and frustration in me and I have no idea how to solve it. I become grumpy and bitter towards everyone - less cheerful and serious. At one point I asked myself - Do I even know how to have fun? All my life all I have ever been doing is making attempts to fix my life to match my imagined life. Always working, always seemingly doing right thing. Not only I didnt get results I feel I never became a normal person either.

I tried meditation but it doesn't seem to help much. What do I do? All this emotional conflict is leading to Pre Mature Aging(is that a word?), Bad Confidence Levels, Pessimism, Being Fragile and Stifled.

No more!
That’s basically my personality. Fvck meditation. Think diet. Your diet is more than what you eat. It’s what you feed your mind too. What u watch. What you read. Who you hang out with. Etc.

Go do shyt you like. By yourself. Then. Make a GOAL. Achieve that goal. Then make another. If you don’t feel better after those goals, then you might need more drastic measures. But usually momentum solves everything.

-lifetime grump.
 

Mike32ct

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
Messages
5,678
Reaction score
1,373
Location
Eastern Time Zone where it's always really late
Hey folks, I'll directly get to point.

I feel there's a lot of pent up anger and frustration in me and I have no idea how to solve it. I become grumpy and bitter towards everyone - less cheerful and serious. At one point I asked myself - Do I even know how to have fun? All my life all I have ever been doing is making attempts to fix my life to match my imagined life. Always working, always seemingly doing right thing. Not only I didnt get results I feel I never became a normal person either.

I tried meditation but it doesn't seem to help much. What do I do? All this emotional conflict is leading to Pre Mature Aging(is that a word?), Bad Confidence Levels, Pessimism, Being Fragile and Stifled.

No more!
Are you getting enough sleep? It’s easy to be cranky when you’re tired and easier to be chill when you are well-rested.
 

EyeOnThePrize

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
21
Reaction score
14
you don't meditate to get something. meditation is about letting the natural process of being unfold by itself. it's a practice only in the sense that you keep catching your mind wondering and bring it back to your breath. every time you catch it rejoice, that is a moment of insight. sometimes meditation will seem to do nothing to you, other times it will break you down to tears. you don't have to know why, you simply have to experience it fully and soak it all in.

it's fine to be improving yourself and 'fixing' your life, but sometimes it's alright to let go a bit and enjoy it. if you feel stagnant or bored shake shiit up. take a spontaneous trip and talk to a bunch of strangers. join a sports league and attend every single event. do some yoga and get flexible. join a boxing gym. pick up an instrument. start drawing/painting. whatever you choose to do, be consistent. giving up after 2 or 3 or 6 outings is a child's mentality. when you stick with something and start to get good at something you create a positive feedback loop that quite literally gets you high. being an expert at something feels so fuucking good and creates tons of confidence and pride in yourself. THAT is what will soothe your grumpy ass. when you can look at yourself and say FUUCK i'm a boss at this and enjoy the living hell out of it. you'll feel alive because you put the hours in and did it all by yourself. no one told you to do shiit, you just did it and became a badass in the field. along the way you'll hone your patience and a ton of other skills depending on what you pick. improvement is an s curve, it's not linear. improvement is a campaign of discipline. pick something and get good. feel like shiit? practice that thing. pour that fuucking anger into your hobby. watch it manifest as something beautiful. that grumpy attitude is energy that you need to release into the world through creative outlets.
 

switch7

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 20, 2014
Messages
528
Reaction score
250
Location
uk
Hey folks, I'll directly get to point.

I feel there's a lot of pent up anger and frustration in me and I have no idea how to solve it. I become grumpy and bitter towards everyone - less cheerful and serious. At one point I asked myself - Do I even know how to have fun? All my life all I have ever been doing is making attempts to fix my life to match my imagined life. Always working, always seemingly doing right thing. Not only I didnt get results I feel I never became a normal person either.

I tried meditation but it doesn't seem to help much. What do I do? All this emotional conflict is leading to Pre Mature Aging(is that a word?), Bad Confidence Levels, Pessimism, Being Fragile and Stifled.

No more!
What are you trying to become and why? What is your desired life?
 

How This "Nice Guy" Steals Women from Jerks

Did you know a woman can be totally UN-ATTRACTED to you...

And she'll still sleep with you?

If you've ever seen a girl go home with some asshole she didn't even LIKE, you know this is true.

But how is this possible?

Because deep inside her brain, sexual desire has nothing to do with what you LOOK like...

And everything to do with how you make her FEEL.

Matt Cook knows this all too well.

Matt is a nice guy... but he steals women from JERKS all the time.

In this free video training below, he'll show you how he does it:

How to Control Her Emotions and Make Her Chase You

Kotaix

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2019
Messages
140
Reaction score
89
Age
41
I've been in your situation most of my life, but recently I've been coming out of it.

You need to realize that Now is the time you're alive. Your imagined life will never come you pass, and may not even go as far as what you've imagined. You need to learn to enjoy the Now. I kept thinking that at some point in the future, the stars would be aligned correctly and what I'd done would finally bear fruit. But I never gave myself permission to be proud of what i've accomplished now, to enjoy the moment I was in. I'm a lot happier since I started focusing on the Now, and what I'm taking about is actually a form of meditation. If you're failed at it in the past and it doesn't do anything for you, it's because you're new at it and you need practice.

Also, you should stop thinking about life as some kind of equity game. Fate doesn't care. Hypergamy doesn't care. You could die tomorrow without having enjoyed life.

I suggest you read Thus Spoke Zarathustra by Nietzsche. Read each paragraph and find what it means to you, reflect on that meaning. I don't normally read much anymore but that book is powerful.

Also, check out the teachings of stoicism.
 

wifehunter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 6, 2015
Messages
4,590
Reaction score
2,645
Age
45
Location
Orange County, California
How's your finances? If you're holding dollars or dollar based investments, you are slowly getting rekt.

I would be a grumpalumpgus, too.

 
Last edited:

PeasantPlayer

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2013
Messages
2,609
Reaction score
652
you don't meditate to get something. meditation is about letting the natural process of being unfold by itself. it's a practice only in the sense that you keep catching your mind wondering and bring it back to your breath. every time you catch it rejoice, that is a moment of insight. sometimes meditation will seem to do nothing to you, other times it will break you down to tears. you don't have to know why, you simply have to experience it fully and soak it all in.

it's fine to be improving yourself and 'fixing' your life, but sometimes it's alright to let go a bit and enjoy it. if you feel stagnant or bored shake shiit up. take a spontaneous trip and talk to a bunch of strangers. join a sports league and attend every single event. do some yoga and get flexible. join a boxing gym. pick up an instrument. start drawing/painting. whatever you choose to do, be consistent. giving up after 2 or 3 or 6 outings is a child's mentality. when you stick with something and start to get good at something you create a positive feedback loop that quite literally gets you high. being an expert at something feels so fuucking good and creates tons of confidence and pride in yourself. THAT is what will soothe your grumpy ass. when you can look at yourself and say FUUCK i'm a boss at this and enjoy the living hell out of it. you'll feel alive because you put the hours in and did it all by yourself. no one told you to do shiit, you just did it and became a badass in the field. along the way you'll hone your patience and a ton of other skills depending on what you pick. improvement is an s curve, it's not linear. improvement is a campaign of discipline. pick something and get good. feel like shiit? practice that thing. pour that fuucking anger into your hobby. watch it manifest as something beautiful. that grumpy attitude is energy that you need to release into the world through creative outlets.
Right meditation is not what people think of it in the west
 

Spaz

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
5,954
Reaction score
4,255
Location
Somewhere where's it's none of your business
All those feelings is caused by having losing streaks on an extended period, you need some wins in life.

Don't aim for the big pull at once, go for the small stuff, easy to attain wins then work ur way up.

That'll work wonders in ur confidence and ultimately restoring some lost mojo.
 

GetBetter

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 17, 2013
Messages
156
Reaction score
8
That’s basically my personality. Fvck meditation. Think diet. Your diet is more than what you eat. It’s what you feed your mind too. What u watch. What you read. Who you hang out with. Etc.

Go do shyt you like. By yourself. Then. Make a GOAL. Achieve that goal. Then make another. If you don’t feel better after those goals, then you might need more drastic measures. But usually momentum solves everything.

-lifetime grump.
Man! Solid advice! Really! I do not even know what to surf or what to do so I find myself checking Instagram every 2 minutes and spending endless time reading mind numbing memes or "gaming" girls who are not even interested. I have books pending but reading non fiction too much is just plain boring and sometimes too much to take in.

I searched the internet about what's a good mental diet and all I see is 7Day Mental Diet program. I have tried that in past and it has always ended in failure. Any suggestions by you? What should I be doing instead of Instagram? What should I be reading on Internet? Where should my time be devoted? I have many friends but it seems I do not connect with a lot of them. The ones I do with are busy with studies or managing their business. I love parties but my financial situation is in the ruins which I am determined to take control of.
 

GetBetter

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 17, 2013
Messages
156
Reaction score
8
you don't meditate to get something. meditation is about letting the natural process of being unfold by itself. it's a practice only in the sense that you keep catching your mind wondering and bring it back to your breath. every time you catch it rejoice, that is a moment of insight. sometimes meditation will seem to do nothing to you, other times it will break you down to tears. you don't have to know why, you simply have to experience it fully and soak it all in.
Embarrassed how despite knowing I overlooked this.

it's fine to be improving yourself and 'fixing' your life, but sometimes it's alright to let go a bit and enjoy it. if you feel stagnant or bored shake shiit up. take a spontaneous trip and talk to a bunch of strangers. join a sports league and attend every single event. do some yoga and get flexible. join a boxing gym. pick up an instrument. start drawing/painting. whatever you choose to do, be consistent. giving up after 2 or 3 or 6 outings is a child's mentality. when you stick with something and start to get good at something you create a positive feedback loop that quite literally gets you high. being an expert at something feels so fuucking good and creates tons of confidence and pride in yourself. THAT is what will soothe your grumpy ass. when you can look at yourself and say FUUCK i'm a boss at this and enjoy the living hell out of it. you'll feel alive because you put the hours in and did it all by yourself. no one told you to do shiit, you just did it and became a badass in the field. along the way you'll hone your patience and a ton of other skills depending on what you pick. improvement is an s curve, it's not linear. improvement is a campaign of discipline. pick something and get good. feel like shiit? practice that thing. pour that fuucking anger into your hobby. watch it manifest as something beautiful. that grumpy attitude is energy that you need to release into the world through creative outlets.
You have led me to a great realisation. My main problem is with me not being able to be free in conversations. I think a lot before I speak and end up not saying anything at all. I come across as pretentious. During a Pickup bootcamp, the coach made me talk to strangers, until I was flowing. I made at least 6 people run away because I was unbelievably boring. By the end of it, I was so free and it felt great! Not being able to party, pickup chicks and travel is eating me inside. Also, my mental blueprint is that I am a famous artist, who is high value, a player, rich, and lives the life people dream of. I am not even close and not only that, it's going the opposite, except the art part maybe, while I remain in the same mental attitude of a top guy. I am carefree yet stressed and whenever I am in a social setting, I feel the least value guy. During solo travels too I feel like **** - I do not mean ****. I have no value. If I died nobody would care.

I believe I would do a lot of things, if I had money. I am so tied down because of broke situation...Plus getting a job doesn't even feel the right option. I am figuring it out.

I think I should focus on Pickup for two weeks. Then pick something else.
I've been in your situation most of my life, but recently I've been coming out of it.

You need to realize that Now is the time you're alive. Your imagined life will never come you pass, and may not even go as far as what you've imagined. You need to learn to enjoy the Now. I kept thinking that at some point in the future, the stars would be aligned correctly and what I'd done would finally bear fruit. But I never gave myself permission to be proud of what i've accomplished now, to enjoy the moment I was in. I'm a lot happier since I started focusing on the Now, and what I'm taking about is actually a form of meditation. If you're failed at it in the past and it doesn't do anything for you, it's because you're new at it and you need practice.

Also, you should stop thinking about life as some kind of equity game. Fate doesn't care. Hypergamy doesn't care. You could die tomorrow without having enjoyed life.

I suggest you read Thus Spoke Zarathustra by Nietzsche. Read each paragraph and find what it means to you, reflect on that meaning. I don't normally read much anymore but that book is powerful.

Also, check out the teachings of stoicism.
Thank you Kotiax! I was just thinking about this the other day - How I never gave myself permission to be dominating(not the right word but how you describe alphas) until I had enough money in the bank. I realized that these guys were like that no matter how broke they were. I need to give myself more permission to feel better. However on the other note, I have tried the Morning Questions Routine by Tony Robbins to change my thinking patters, did not work. I fell off. Also, living life freely, thinking it will come to pass as fate wanted has always left me feeling miserable. I feel better thinking I am the one controlling. Maybe I am not giving myself permission again, thinking I would do that when I have money? Quite possible.

I will however read the book Zarathustra. I always wanted to read Nietzsche but never knew which one to start with. I have also been thinking that maybe I should follow my religion again - these guys knew how to leave life with harmony in them and with world. Idk. I have enjoy atheism but maybe it's not the right way.

All those feelings is caused by having losing streaks on an extended period, you need some wins in life.

Don't aim for the big pull at once, go for the small stuff, easy to attain wins then work ur way up.

That'll work wonders in ur confidence and ultimately restoring some lost mojo.
I am doing this currently. However my mind screams "Do not fool me. These minute things are pathetic! Go big!" Plus I am not even sure which direction to start with. I started with trying to fix my sleep schedule. Nothing really motivating there. Nothing is motivating tbh. I have to force myself to get work done. Any suggestions what I could start with?

Please do not hate me or disregard me but maybe I do not want to help myself. I want to but not really. It's an intrinsic battle.

Maybe you get where all this attitude is coming from...
 

Spaz

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
5,954
Reaction score
4,255
Location
Somewhere where's it's none of your business
I am doing this currently. However my mind screams "Do not fool me. These minute things are pathetic! Go big!" Plus I am not even sure which direction to start with. I started with trying to fix my sleep schedule. Nothing really motivating there. Nothing is motivating tbh. I have to force myself to get work done. Any suggestions what I could start with?

Please do not hate me or disregard me but maybe I do not want to help myself. I want to but not really. It's an intrinsic battle.

Maybe you get where all this attitude is coming from...
All wars are won by winning little battles.

Life is a series of small little battles.

Choose something that's lacking or you feel needs improvement then lock into that, focus on it.

The trick is when u r feeling low or demoralised you switch to low gears, the easiest is head to the gym or go do some physical activity that yields positive results.
 

EyeOnThePrize

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
21
Reaction score
14
I believe I would do a lot of things, if I had money. I am so tied down because of broke situation...Plus getting a job doesn't even feel the right option. I am figuring it out.

I think I should focus on Pickup for two weeks. Then pick something else.
You're putting the cart before the horse. Focusing on pick up when you feel miserable alone will only compound the ****tiness because women will pick up on desperation and find out that you don't even like yourself, so why should they? The same thing with money. Money isn't required for a Dom mindset. Time is your most precious commodity, spend it doing something you find worth, with people you find worthy. Grind hard and never stop.
 

daproest1

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 26, 2019
Messages
213
Reaction score
52
Age
31
Man! Solid advice! Really! I do not even know what to surf or what to do so I find myself checking Instagram every 2 minutes and spending endless time reading mind numbing memes or "gaming" girls who are not even interested. I have books pending but reading non fiction too much is just plain boring and sometimes too much to take in.

I searched the internet about what's a good mental diet and all I see is 7Day Mental Diet program. I have tried that in past and it has always ended in failure. Any suggestions by you? What should I be doing instead of Instagram? What should I be reading on Internet? Where should my time be devoted? I have many friends but it seems I do not connect with a lot of them. The ones I do with are busy with studies or managing their business. I love parties but my financial situation is in the ruins which I am determined to take control of.
Whatever is concerning you the most right now, learn about that. Sounds like it’s money. Sounds like you’re young too. Read about money.

Books. Simple list (there are better more detailed ones these are the classics)

-rich dad poor dad
-think and grow rich
-the richest man in Babylon
-how to win friends and influence people
-outwitting the devil
 
Top