Grrr

[Exhumed]

Lately girls have been telling me "We're just friends, right?" or "We're gonna be bffs" or something like that two minutes after meeting her. It's annoying, girls are only supposed to say that to pvssies who get put in the friendzone, not to someone she just met who's making a legitimate attempt at getting in her pants. What a demeaning rejection line!

Now of course, much like the actual LJBF, I wouldn't put it past a girl to say this just to f*ck with me, because I've had girls say "Let's just be friends" and not mean it...you know, they use it as a sh*t test basically.

I can't be the only one who has been told this before. How do you respond to it? Do you treat it as a rejection and eject? Or do you treat it as a **** test that can be overcome with a smile and a snappy response?

 

[Pimp-sicle]

DJ 101:

Never listen to a word a girl says, instead to get the truth watch her actions....







PIMP

 

[Jhcl4000]

"I've got too many friends already, I dunno if I can fit you in."

 

[Exhumed]

Have you guys experienced what I'm talking about though? It sounds like a pretty clear rejection line to me. And she pulls it out casually in the middle of conversation, like two minutes after you've started to work some game. Every time I've seen a girl use it as a sh*t test it has come a day or two after meeting her. Have you had a girl say this to you a couple minutes into the conversation, and ended up sleeping with her without any significant difficulty?

 

[WC2]

I wouldn't be too discouraged.

There are 3 types of men out there.

Men who are IN the friendzone and deny it.
Men who are in the friendzone and admit it.
Men who f*ck women.

Men who are in the friendzone and deny it are those men you see orbiting around hot women. They want to avoid any 'awkward moment' so they will just assume the role of girl-friend without even knowing it. Instead of having balls and standing up for themselves, they back down to whatever women say, in hopes that they don't stir up in controversy. These tend to be the same individuals who loiter around women all night, hoping one of them will magically f*ck him in the middle of a bar. When the end of the night comes, he will make a poor attempt at going back with one of these women, at which time all her friends will come to her rescue with some lame excuse like "Oh sorry, she's going to puke!"

Men who are in the friendzone and admit it, much like yourself are far superior to men who deny it. Why? Because they aren't pvssies who are afraid of confrontation. When a woman tells you to do something, you may falter at first, but eventually you regain balance and stop treating these women like friends. Unfortunately, this usually comes to late and almost always comes off as you being bitter. Typically you will see these men being nice in the beginning of the night, and get bitter towards the end, ultimately ending in a VERY awkward situation.

Lastly, men who f*ck women. They don't need female friends. Females are purely (almost purely at least) there for sexual needs. If a woman offers the false branch of friendship to us, we swipe it away before she can even finish the sentence. However most of the time, we never get this line. Why? Because we aren't needy for female company. Sure, we love females, but we don't need them around us all the time. This is what sets apart men who KNOW they shouldn't be in the friendzone and men who KNOW they AREN'T in the friendzone.

 

[Exhumed]

I guess so dude. Seems like an unnecessary rant. I don't consider what I'm talking about to be the friendzone. It felt like more of just a regular rejection.

I consider the friendzone to be different. Like, you're chilling with her and not making moves, being a puss, and then you say something awkward and sexual and she tells you you're just friends. That hasn't happened to me in a long while.

But even still...why would she use that line on me? How not nice. Maybe my game is just lacking, and/or she simply wasn't interested. It's almost an insult; usually the LJBF line is reserved for shy, awkward dudes, and she's just using it as a regular rejection, like "I have a boyfriend". I seriously think girls are catching on to how ****ty "Let's just be friends" is and are using it whenever they can, as girls have been using it more often on me lately; even interested ones have used it as a sh!t test.

Is this still the friendzone? I don't think it's the same thing. The solution to not getting into the friendzone is to be more openly sexual, but girls are saying this to me right off the bat as a direct response to my flirting with them...

 

[WC2]

I guess so dude. Seems like an unnecessary rant. I don't consider what I'm talking about to be the friendzone. It felt like more of just a regular rejection.

I consider the friendzone to be different. Like, you're chilling with her and not making moves, being a puss, and then you say something awkward and sexual and she tells you you're just friends. That hasn't happened to me in a long while.

But even still...why would she use that line on me? How not nice. Maybe my game is just lacking, and/or she simply wasn't interested. It's almost an insult; usually the LJBF line is reserved for shy, awkward dudes, and she's just using it as a regular rejection, like "I have a boyfriend". I seriously think girls are catching on to how ****ty "Let's just be friends" is and are using it whenever they can, as girls have been using it more often on me lately; even interested ones have used it as a sh!t test.

Is this still the friendzone? I don't think it's the same thing. The solution to not getting into the friendzone is to be more openly sexual, but girls are saying this to me right off the bat as a direct response to my flirting with them...

Honestly if she's telling you that she just wants to be friends or she doesn't want to be romantic, then yeah; you're in the friendzone.

Not saying you can't ever escape it, but you're definitely there. Sounds to me like when you talk to women you display more friend-like traits than you do masculine/sexual traits. Just something to think about.

 

[Exhumed]

Hmm. I still flirt, talk about sex, escalate, etc. but I'll try to make sure the tone of my voice is masculine and maybe try to be more direct...I don't look very masculine, I'm thin and I have a baby face (My friend remarked the other night that I look like a very attractive twelve year old) so maybe I just need to be extra sexual and masculine to make up for it.

Now that I'm no longer really desperate or socially awkward and I'm not a pvssy (meaning I don't take sh!t from girls or buy them things or get attached to them or get scared of approaching them) I'm finding it difficult to fine-tune my game.

Maybe I'm just a few pounds and some facial hair away from success...in high school and during summer semester when older college guys were scarce it was easier to find interested girls, I was at the top of the high school food chain and then came to college before most upperclassmen arrived. As long as I look like a skinny fifteen year old my options will be more limited, that's just something I'll have to deal with for now.

I still see it as a rejection rather than friendzone; a girl says it when she first meets me and I'm teasing her and kino-ing her lightly, it's not like I'm getting there by failing to be sexual and make moves on her.

 

[Remy]

Why dont you just respond with somethin like, "phew! I'm glad you said that; I was worried you were hitting on me and was trying to think of ways I could let you down easy enough that you wouldnt make a scene"

or something else equally funny and insulting at the same time lol

 

[Exhumed]

Ahh clever, I like it

 

[Exhumed]

Okay, I definitely think I have a problem with getting stuck in the friendzone.

I have difficulty getting really into it if the girl isn't immediately showing signs of interest in me, and if I don't find her to be really attractive. I cut back on masturbation but maybe if I stop completely that will help. I shouldn't have jerked it this morning, I've got a party to go to in two hours and there will be girls there, stupid me. Guess I should do some pushups and get hard without c*mming or something.

Sometimes it's also difficult to get the right tone of voice going too, not usually, but sometimes that's an issue.

But really, I find it easier to game an 8 or a 9 than a 7 just because I'm more attracted...I wouldn't mind hooking up with some 7s but it's hard to motivate myself to go after them sometimes. So much easier when she's flirting with me and looking gorgeous and I'm just like ahhh so sexy I want it now!

I've gotten past my inability to escalate, gained plenty of confidence, learned to be more dominant, and I don't say/do things around a girl or through text that are pvssy/AFC, or obsess over girls, all within the past six months...but I guess my game still needs a bit of improvement. Now that I'm comfortable with escalating though I could still lose my v-card with a bit of luck and mutual horniness with the girl, so I'm hoping that happens soon.

Well I'm going to do some pushups, watch some porn, find some articles on in the DJ bible about avoiding the friendzone...I'll report on how the party went later if it's worth reporting.

 

[Exhumed]

Here's something interesting I found written by Sinn and posted on somebody's blog, by typing "avoiding ljbf" into google. It's a concept I've seen before but--maybe I was just escalating too quickly? Escalating at the wrong time...too early? I dunno, I'm going to try this at the party tonight. Since I'll be seeing these people again it would be a bad idea to go more towards the caveman end of the spectrum anyways, especially if I then failed.

http://missionpua.wordpress.com/category/pua-resources/

"14. Now, BECOME HER FRIEND, and SLATE HER INTO A FRIEND ROLE IN YOUR LIFE.

This will get you laid like crazy, if you can actually do it.

From now on, make your goal to become friends with girls. Treat like friends. Say the following lines liberally:

“You’re such a good friend.”
“It’s nice to become friends with you.”
“I feel like a better person around you.”
“You bring out the best in me.”
“I dig your friends – they’re my kind of people.”
“I’m glad you got along so well with my friends, that’s really cool and important to me.” (after she meets your friends, regardless of if she gets along with them or not)
“It’s nice to have friends like you.”
“I feel really comfortable around you.”
“Oh, you’ve GOT to meet my friend (female name). You and her would get along FAMOUSLY.”

Guys are afraid of winding up in LJBF land. They don’t realize who gets put there – loser horndogs who try to escalate at the wrong times. Do girls who are hanging out with cool guys, who are super-chill and having lots of fun, tell the guy, “Let’s just be friends” No! Never! LJBF is a direct result of ****ty escalation. Trying to actually become her friend will never result in LJBF.

At the same time, treat her like a buddy. Call her sometimes just to call her. Shoot her random fun texts. Listen to her. Actually listen. Learn about her. Do fun stuff with her like you’d do with your friends. If you play video games with your friends, invite her to play video games with you. If you do jello shots with your friends, invite her to do jello shots with you and the gang. Do whatever you do with your friends – with her."

 

[Exhumed]

Field report!

Got a new haircut, tried putting gel in it for the first time for that "messy" look with the help of the hairdresser. Looked good. Went to the party, it turned out to be a social for the club I'm in slash birthday party for the host's roommate. So as a result, a lot of people didn't know anybody there at all. At first it was mostly dudes, I talked with this hot (yet wholly uninteresting) blonde girl for a while...she wanted to write for Cosmo. She was an HB8 I'd say. So I asked her if she was going to write a bunch of articles on how to please your man, and implied that she must be good at such matters. So far so good. Then because I had had a bit too much jungle juice, my game was off, so I asked her to give me an example of a sex tip she'd write....there's no real response for that besides awkwardness, so I apologized like an idiot, and joined another conversation...she opened me again later, we talked, I don't remember the details, she didn't seem extremely horny but what do I know? She was probably just a boring person, I'm bad at detecting interest when a girl isn't like "You're cute, let's find a private location!" Idk. I had too much to drink, my conversational skills were hampered. I wasn't sh!tfaced, but I had just enough to screw up my game a bit.

So then later, more girls arrived, but by that time there was no room to even move in the tiny apartment party. I wasn't about to make my way through a crowd of people saying "Excuse me, sorry, excuse me" and then ask people to make room for me so I could enter their conversation and hit on girls. So I just called it a night and left.

What I learned:
--Don't drink jungle juice when you're trying to game girls. Have a couple of beers, maintain a slight buzz, use alcohol to your advantage
--I look damn good with a short haircut, 10x as many girls check me out.
--Hot blonde sophomores might actually be interested in me...normally I get the younger looking, shorter, cute girls. I myself am tall and younger looking.
--It's difficult to maintain conversation with a generic hot girl with no personality with whom I have nothing in common. Like, okay, you like fashion and partying, that's about it, I guess you want me to do 90% of the work in this conversation, and probably in sex as well? Generic hot blonde girls suck.

The apartment party was packed, so I couldn't have really isolated the girl, and none of the frats were open this weekend because they were collecting money for charity (I'm in a frat, but I didn't go on the trip this weekend) so bouncing to a different party would have been difficult. I also knew nobody there, except one kid, who was baked and spent most of the time texting and watching beer pong being played. It wasn't an ideal party for hooking up with girls.

Oh well, I've got an HB6 who isn't necessarily "interested" per se but finds me attractive, and will hang out with me and hook up with me, so I'll get some practice from that. I wanna try and get on this girl who has a boyfriend too, not expecting anything from that, but we'll see how that goes, she's not exactly super horny for me but I know she digs me, I haven't talked to her in a few months because I've been busy, but I'm sure she'd be down to chill.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Field report!--It's difficult to maintain conversation with a generic hot girl with no personality with whom I have nothing in common. Like, okay, you like fashion and partying, that's about it, I guess you want me to do 90% of the work in this conversation, and probably in sex as well? Generic hot blonde girls suck.

You've got it all wrong here bro... you can talk to a girl about whatever you want, the key is to lead the conversation, smoothly transition from topic to topic while also creating and amplifying the attraction level.

If you talk to a girl about fashion and partying, your not gonna get into her pants. You need to build some comfort at the start, then start to excite her by flirting and keeping her laughing. From there you escalate and get the goods.

Lastly you failed to even really understand my initial response, the first one in this thread where I said "watch a girl's actions rather than her words" for her true intent.

Well it works the same way for you! If you throw out an ultimatum to a girl its never gonna end the way you want. "Do this or I'm gone" is the wrong way to go every time!

This girl was enjoying your company, you had kissed and fingered her already but you showed her your cards and lost. Instead you should have kept building up the attraction and you guys would've most likely fuvked.

Sounds like you don't know how to flirt and how to sell yourself by projecting confidence.

I can't tell you how many girls I've said extremely sexual things to especially at a party within the first 5 minutes of meeting them with positive results.





PIMP

 

[Exhumed]

You're right, I'm horrible at chatting up girls at parties! I can project confidence; hell, that's probably part of why she approached me. I was looking good, I was having a good time, I felt pretty confident.

I'm a decent looking, attractive dude and I've got the whole "inner game" thing down pretty well. But inner game is just PUA banter for "Having your sh!t together and not being a puss or a social retard", to the general public "game" is something external. So by that definition, my game sucks! At least as far as parties go.

I never went to a single party in high school (unless you count fifteen people, all from my high school, some girls but no potential hook-ups coming over to drink) and I haven't the slightest idea of how to work game at a party. Now I'm in college, in a fraternity, and I party every weekend. At least I'll have plenty of opportunities to practice.

If I know some people at a party, or it's a relaxed social atmosphere, or I can tell immediately the girl is into me (okay, I guess here I really should have known haha) then my game is serviceable. A party is a much more intense atmosphere and although most of the same concepts apply, I'm not used to working game at a party.

But screw it, I need to work on my game at parties! Thanks for the advice pimp-sicle, it was spot-on and just in time for the weekend.

If anyone else has a useful tip, feel free to let me know. I think what I need most is just a bit more practice with gaming at parties. If I've got my inner game and appearance down and I can flirt casually with girls outside of parties, hopefully I'll get this stuff down and be hooking up pretty regularly by sophomore year.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

You're right, I'm horrible at chatting up girls at parties! I can project confidence; hell, that's probably part of why she approached me. I was looking good, I was having a good time, I felt pretty confident.

I'm a decent looking, attractive dude and I've got the whole "inner game" thing down pretty well. But inner game is just PUA banter for "Having your sh!t together and not being a puss or a social retard", to the general public "game" is something external. So by that definition, my game sucks! At least as far as parties go.

I never went to a single party in high school (unless you count fifteen people, all from my high school, some girls but no potential hook-ups coming over to drink) and I haven't the slightest idea of how to work game at a party. Now I'm in college, in a fraternity, and I party every weekend. At least I'll have plenty of opportunities to practice.

If I know some people at a party, or it's a relaxed social atmosphere, or I can tell immediately the girl is into me (okay, I guess here I really should have known haha) then my game is serviceable. A party is a much more intense atmosphere and although most of the same concepts apply, I'm not used to working game at a party.

But screw it, I need to work on my game at parties! Thanks for the advice pimp-sicle, it was spot-on and just in time for the weekend.

If anyone else has a useful tip, feel free to let me know. I think what I need most is just a bit more practice with gaming at parties. If I've got my inner game and appearance down and I can flirt casually with girls outside of parties, hopefully I'll get this stuff down and be hooking up pretty regularly by sophomore year.

No worries bro, glad it was helpful.


Ahhh the frat days, I miss 'em!! I was in a fraternity in college too and bro let me tell you it was the P-U$$Y PALACE!!! HAHAHA

Here's a few specific pointers for frat parties:

1) Be fuvkin' ubber confident because YOU own the fuvkin' room when a bunch of byatches come over to your frat house to party.

2) If your not a good dancer, learn how to be at least average. More on this in a minute.

3) Always work the bar! ALWAYS! Why? You make the drinks, girls come up to you, so you don't have to worry about opening. Then you make them a rad drink while flirting with them. When your done making drinks then you can go through the party and find that hottie you were talking to earlier and either flirt more or take her straight to the dance floor and your chances of hooking up go up immensely!! Think about it: you've created rapport by making her drink, you've projected confidence, you get to use kino when grindin' her @ss and lastly you get her HORNY! HAHA

4) Be the FUN GUY at parties: Be loud, outlandish, fun and the center of attention. You'll be amazed when girls follow you around the party or just happen to be everywhere you are as the night goes on. The simple fact is that girls like fun guys, ESPECIALLY at parties. They're all there to unwind from the stressful week and don't ever forget that 90% OF THE GIRLS THERE WANT TO HOOK-UP!

5) Unless you start hooking up right away, never spend too much time with one girl. There are soooooo many girls there and if you've sparked some attraction with a girl, then she'll only want you that much more (especially once she gets fuvked up) later when she see's you talking with several other girls.

Sidenote: When I was in my frat, after I worked the bar I had a good handle on the girls I was interested in since everyone comes to the bar at one point. When the party was going good, I'd leave the bar and go walk around and chat up all the girls on my list. I'd always hook up with the one that was the most willing and able that night, but made sure I at least number closed the others on my list that were also interested. That way you line up dates for the following week and still hook up that night.

6) Enjoy yourself: Don't over-analyze, don't fret about what to say, just be confident, don't go for the girl's bait right away, make her chase you a bit and you'll increase your closing ratio by 90%.



Lastly, enjoy your frat experience, DON'T GET TIED DOWN WITH A GF while your in. That would be like bringing your wife to every back stage concert if you were a huge rockstar in your hey-day. Just roll through as many slvts as you can and have fun.







PIMP