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GREAT first date, kiss close >>>> 2 days later, LJBFs in a voice message!

Hot Ice Casanova

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2009
Messages
52
Reaction score
2
OK guys, what happened yesterday is RETARDED. I followed the DJ rules to the letter and this **** happened. Here's the story from the beginning:

EVERYTHING WAS GOING SMOOTH....

I met this cute redhead chick at a college bookstore two fridays ago. Got her number, did it smooth and confident, no nervousness or hesitation. So I start chatting her up on monday, keep talking for a week, by tuesday she's already down to go out. I choose the place and time, for friday, she accepts. No begging, buying, or other nice-guy BS. I also said my friends were having a BBQ later that friday, I invited her, but didn't pressure her to go. She also accepted that.

So I met her friday and we went to the beach, everything was cool, she was super chill and we held hands, kiss closed and I got good kino, she seemed totally into it, not nervous or anything... and miss redhead TOLD me that she was shy, so I just assumed that was token resistance and it evaporated beautifully... but as we were on a public beach there was only so far I could escalate. We walked around the town and I took her to this very beautiful secluded spot with a cliffside view of the sea. We chatted and made out several more times. She was also a bit ticklish but enjoyed being touched.

Then we went to my friend's BBQ party, there were others there too. Had some burgers, a drink or two, and watched a movie. We had a night of fun laughs with my friends, who are definitely "Alpha men" and DJs too, but they all invited their chicks too so there was no chance of c0ckblocking (they wouldn't block me anyway). She was definitely enjoying it, then we made out on the couch while the others were still on the balcony eating. Then around 10:30 we left and called it a night because she was super tired from a midterm and had class the next day, and studying for her last midterm on top of that. (her last Midterm is tomorrow...) She said not to call her that night because she would probably be asleep as soon as she got home.

So then on saturday I didn't call her either, I'm a busy guy and not clingy... and I had another chick for saturday night that I've already banged, so she's solid. But then I gave the redhead chick a call on sunday night, got no response, left a quick message "Hey this is HotIceCasanova, gimme a call back" which was confident and she always called back when I'd done it before.

But this time, she NEVER CALLED BACK that night. I figured she must be studying, stressed, whatever. I've only known her for a week, only gone out once, so she's not super high priority or anything. I figured I'd spin more plates anyway regardless of whether this chick amounts to anything more than a first date (or day 2, or whatever... I suppose it's not a "date" in the negative AFC sense since I didn't spend a single dime on her and we still had a fun time and kissed and kinoed).


THE REJECTION (OR IS IT???)

But then YESTERDAY she called in the middle of the day when I was in class (normally we only chatted in the evening or night), my cell was silenced and she left a message. I saw this afterwards, and I listened to the message before calling her. SHE SAID TWO THINGS:

1. "sorry I didnt call you back last night, I was studying at my friend's house... it's really hard material... blah blah blah..."
2. "I talked to my ex and I want to get back together with him, I had a really good time on friday but WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS"



I didn't call her after that. I have NO FVCKIN' CLUE what to do.

I mean, this is literally the ONLY time I've been friendzoned (well, maybe not yet since I haven't told her I accepted it) since my AFC days.

Sure I've gotten rejections as a DJ, but NEVER have I been LJBF'd before as a DJ. And on top of it all, I followed all the DJ rules, confidence, calmness, not putting the chick on a pedestal. I didn't expect this chick to be girlfriend material, heck I was cool with the possibility that she might not turn out that good. But I was not expecting to be LJBF'd after she'd given every indication she was into me that night.

I mean SERIOUSLY, would any chick who's attracted to a guy SUDDENLY out of the blue friendzone him and start seeing her ex instead?????? And she's got her last midterm to study for, so she's "TOO BUSY" to return my call, or even text, but somehow not "too busy" to get back with her ex that same night (or was she hiding it from me for a whole week? should I even ask her?)

A great first date, she was diggin' it every step of the way, and then she somehow gets back with her ex despite being too busy with studying to even return a simple call, and she leaves a mid-day message saying LJBF!!!!


SOLUTIONS, ANYONE?

This is a damn freak of a situation I've never faced before. I mean I'm not crazy about this chick but she's hot and I played all my DJ cards right, no stupid routines or lines, just pure MASCULINITY and confidence, and she was attracted! I didn't escalate too fast for her comfort levels, and I didn't have the logistics in place for a same-night lay anyway so I don't think buyer's remorse was an issue. In fact our BEST makeout was at the very end of the night when we said goodbye, she got all passionate and touchy-feely. So it began on a good note and ended on an even better one.

What the FVCK happened here?!?!?!? And what do all you DJs and especially MASTER DJs recommend ? If I get her back, great, if not, well I'm going to sarge other chicks anyway, but I REALLY want to avoid this **** happening again.

....
....
....
 

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Tiguere

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 15, 2009
Messages
1,017
Reaction score
46
she is still hung up over her ex. it seems like she is emotinally unavailable to anyone besides her ex at this point in time. move on and decline her friendship
 

nightcrawler

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 12, 2007
Messages
425
Reaction score
5
Hot Ice Casanova said:
OK guys, what happened yesterday is RETARDED. I followed the DJ rules to the letter and this **** happened. Here's the story from the beginning:

EVERYTHING WAS GOING SMOOTH....

I met this cute redhead chick at a college bookstore two fridays ago. Got her number, did it smooth and confident, no nervousness or hesitation. So I start chatting her up on monday, keep talking for a week, by tuesday she's already down to go out. I choose the place and time, for friday, she accepts. No begging, buying, or other nice-guy BS. I also said my friends were having a BBQ later that friday, I invited her, but didn't pressure her to go. She also accepted that.

So I met her friday and we went to the beach, everything was cool, she was super chill and we held hands, kiss closed and I got good kino, she seemed totally into it, not nervous or anything... and miss redhead TOLD me that she was shy, so I just assumed that was token resistance and it evaporated beautifully... but as we were on a public beach there was only so far I could escalate. We walked around the town and I took her to this very beautiful secluded spot with a cliffside view of the sea. We chatted and made out several more times. She was also a bit ticklish but enjoyed being touched.

Then we went to my friend's BBQ party, there were others there too. Had some burgers, a drink or two, and watched a movie. We had a night of fun laughs with my friends, who are definitely "Alpha men" and DJs too, but they all invited their chicks too so there was no chance of c0ckblocking (they wouldn't block me anyway). She was definitely enjoying it, then we made out on the couch while the others were still on the balcony eating. Then around 10:30 we left and called it a night because she was super tired from a midterm and had class the next day, and studying for her last midterm on top of that. (her last Midterm is tomorrow...) She said not to call her that night because she would probably be asleep as soon as she got home.

So then on saturday I didn't call her either, I'm a busy guy and not clingy... and I had another chick for saturday night that I've already banged, so she's solid. But then I gave the redhead chick a call on sunday night, got no response, left a quick message "Hey this is HotIceCasanova, gimme a call back" which was confident and she always called back when I'd done it before.

But this time, she NEVER CALLED BACK that night. I figured she must be studying, stressed, whatever. I've only known her for a week, only gone out once, so she's not super high priority or anything. I figured I'd spin more plates anyway regardless of whether this chick amounts to anything more than a first date (or day 2, or whatever... I suppose it's not a "date" in the negative AFC sense since I didn't spend a single dime on her and we still had a fun time and kissed and kinoed).


THE REJECTION (OR IS IT???)

But then YESTERDAY she called in the middle of the day when I was in class (normally we only chatted in the evening or night), my cell was silenced and she left a message. I saw this afterwards, and I listened to the message before calling her. SHE SAID TWO THINGS:

1. "sorry I didnt call you back last night, I was studying at my friend's house... it's really hard material... blah blah blah..."
2. "I talked to my ex and I want to get back together with him, I had a really good time on friday but WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS"



I didn't call her after that. I have NO FVCKIN' CLUE what to do.

I mean, this is literally the ONLY time I've been friendzoned (well, maybe not yet since I haven't told her I accepted it) since my AFC days.

Sure I've gotten rejections as a DJ, but NEVER have I been LJBF'd before as a DJ. And on top of it all, I followed all the DJ rules, confidence, calmness, not putting the chick on a pedestal. I didn't expect this chick to be girlfriend material, heck I was cool with the possibility that she might not turn out that good. But I was not expecting to be LJBF'd after she'd given every indication she was into me that night.

I mean SERIOUSLY, would any chick who's attracted to a guy SUDDENLY out of the blue friendzone him and start seeing her ex instead?????? And she's got her last midterm to study for, so she's "TOO BUSY" to return my call, or even text, but somehow not "too busy" to get back with her ex that same night (or was she hiding it from me for a whole week? should I even ask her?)

A great first date, she was diggin' it every step of the way, and then she somehow gets back with her ex despite being too busy with studying to even return a simple call, and she leaves a mid-day message saying LJBF!!!!


SOLUTIONS, ANYONE?

This is a damn freak of a situation I've never faced before. I mean I'm not crazy about this chick but she's hot and I played all my DJ cards right, no stupid routines or lines, just pure MASCULINITY and confidence, and she was attracted! I didn't escalate too fast for her comfort levels, and I didn't have the logistics in place for a same-night lay anyway so I don't think buyer's remorse was an issue. In fact our BEST makeout was at the very end of the night when we said goodbye, she got all passionate and touchy-feely. So it began on a good note and ended on an even better one.

What the FVCK happened here?!?!?!? And what do all you DJs and especially MASTER DJs recommend ? If I get her back, great, if not, well I'm going to sarge other chicks anyway, but I REALLY want to avoid this **** happening again.

....
....
....
It's funny how you re-assure yourself of your masculinity in this post yet it looks like something out of "ask Debbie"...c on man no need to over analyze this.

with that said, just text her whenever and try to seduce her again. If she doesn't go for it then just move on. She just isn't that into you. Sometimes girls get obsessed with guys and can't get over them. She might like a ex a lot.

move on.
 

SandHawk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 1, 2009
Messages
595
Reaction score
14
Location
Amsterdam, Netherlands
This happened to me with the girl I was making out with on friday. She came over, we spent 6 hours together, had dinner(she cooked me one), made out the entire night, clothing everywhere but no sex as she specifically said no sex because she doesn't trust people that easily.

So we went pretty far, I didn't push her too hard, and after she left, total silence. And after a few days the 'I think I was just enjoying the attention and do not think it is fair on your part' message. Said I was cool with it and moved on. It happens.
 
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Andy_Dufresne

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 18, 2008
Messages
222
Reaction score
9
Location
NorthEast
Hey Casanova,

First date was WAY too long, plus you paraded her in front of a bunch of your buddies after knowing her one or two weeks.

For sure, this was extremely intimidating for her. Put the shoe on the other foot....if you had a first date with a girl and she brought you to a BBQ and paraded you in front of her buddies you would feel intimidated and a bit used, don't you think?

First date should be coffee, 45 mins max, then get the hell out of there. This shows the HB you can hang with her and keep it in your pants.

Hope this helps. Better luck next time!
 
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