Great approach but I flubbed getting the number...

[Nordic_identity]

I saw this girl in my local grocery store that caught my eye months ago. I had a brief interaction with her when I went through the line she was working but nothing significant just simple friendly small talk. I planned to try to expand upon this the next time I saw her but actually had success picking up another girl and got into a one year relationship that I felt moved too quickly for my interest and we recently broke up.

Recently I noticed this girl that previously caught my attention still worked at the same grocery store and I put my fear aside me and approached her while she was doing inventory in an aisle.

The conversation went well and she even asked me follow up questions to the questions I was asking about her. Turns out we have a mutual interest in running and I asked if she had ran any of the trails around town. She said she mostly runs on the roads since she doesn't know the trail scene very well. I told her I could show her some cool places to run around town and then said we should meet up for a run sometime. I then said I won't hold you up but before I leave I'll grab your number real quick and started to reach for my phone. She actually reached out her hand in anticipation but I discovered I didn't have my phone on me and nearly panicked because this kinda caught me off guard but I caught myself, laughed, and said "Well, I actually don't have my phone on me at the moment but hey, I'll see you around" before I parted I confirmed her name and she did the same to me and said "Good I'll remember now".

My question...when or if I see her again, how best do I approach for the number without coming off as desperate or needy. Should I just acknowledge her by name, make brief small talk, and then use my closer again but say something to the extent of "now that I have my phone on me this time I'll actually grab your number and we'll meet up for a run" or is their a better method?

 

[samspade]

My question...when or if I see her again, how best do I approach for the number without coming off as desperate or needy. Should I just acknowledge her by name, make brief small talk, and then use my closer again but say something to the extent of "now that I have my phone on me this time I'll actually grab your number and we'll meet up for a run" or is their a better method?

Yup, keep it short and sweet but just go with the flow. Crack a joke about the phone. "My personal assistant forgot to give it to me. She's so fired." You're doing fine.

BTW, phone numbers are easy to remember. Area code (familiar) plus three digits plus another four. You could have impressed her with your memory skills. Next time that happens...

 

[Nordic_identity]

My buddy actually asked me why I didn't just ask for her number but I said I was just so caught off guard by my phone not being on me that my mind when immediately else where.

Another friend actually told me it was probably good I didn't grab the number because now there's a bit of anticipation that I'll come back in and ask for it. Sorta like I unintentionally kept myself on her mind.

I am not too worried about approaching again after shaking off the initial fear I had when I first saw her and wanted to approach before dedicating myself to an unworthy plate.

 

[Nordic_identity]

In this situation i i would give her your number and put the ball in her court to pursue. You ready opened her.

Hey "name"
Her. Hi
Heres my contact hit me up for that run sometime.

Something like that. Keep it simple and short.
I think going back and pulling info from her might be toơ much because she doesnt know you well and you are inviting her to go run on trails.
Safety reasons etc etc. Thats what i would do. If you made a good first impression let her initiate.

Yep, sorta in-between how I'll grab or offer the number. It might be a split second decision since I don't know when I'll see her next.

Definitely not worried about it. No reason to pedestalize some chick I don't know.

My go to with grabbing a number has always been the "Hey, put your number in my phone"

 

[Stoic]

The problem with this is you may never see her again.

I used to screw myself in the past by saying to myself ah now's not the best time to get the number or go for it. But train myself to always operate as if its the last time I'll see her bc it usually is.

 

[SW15]

What I have done since I got my first cell phone in the early to mid 2000s is this:

I carry my cell phone everywhere. Pre-COVID, if I was in the gym, my cell phone was in my gym shorts. You should be prepared at all times to take a number.

 

[Deep State]

You can ask her to send you a text message. This is my usual go to in this situation. You can ask her to write her number down on a piece of paper. You can ask how to find her on social media.

 

[SW15]

You can ask her to send you a text message. This is my usual go to in this situation. You can ask her to write her number down on a piece of paper. You can ask how to find her on social media.

I agree. She puts your number in her phone and sends you a text while you are standing there so that when you retrieve your phone, she's there.

 

[Nordic_identity]

I have seen this girl in this grocery store previously and I think she's worked there for awhile so I am not sweating never seeing her again. I live in a fairly small town so the staff isn't large so I'd imagine she works semi-regular.

I'll keep the tips in mind about obtaining a number without a cell phone in the future. As I said, it was more that I just got caught off guard when I reach for my phone and it wasn't there. I kinda had that thought of oh ****, where is my phone for that matter? Haha

 

[Nordic_identity]

But trying really hard to not be a sniper. Gonna continue approaches beyond this one. I am just kinda congratulating myself because when I saw her many months ago before my LTR with another girl I cold approached I couldn't muster up the courage.

It's strange really, I thought the girl was too "pretty" and I wouldn't have the confidence to engage but after this recent approach with her I walked out feeling like an idiot for overcomplicating something based upon a fear of rejection. I really need to work on not pedestalizing ***** ‍

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I saw this girl in my local grocery store that caught my eye months ago. I had a brief interaction with her when I went through the line she was working but nothing significant just simple friendly small talk. I planned to try to expand upon this the next time I saw her but actually had success picking up another girl and got into a one year relationship that I felt moved too quickly for my interest and we recently broke up.

Recently I noticed this girl that previously caught my attention still worked at the same grocery store and I put my fear aside me and approached her while she was doing inventory in an aisle.

The conversation went well and she even asked me follow up questions to the questions I was asking about her. Turns out we have a mutual interest in running and I asked if she had ran any of the trails around town. She said she mostly runs on the roads since she doesn't know the trail scene very well. I told her I could show her some cool places to run around town and then said we should meet up for a run sometime. I then said I won't hold you up but before I leave I'll grab your number real quick and started to reach for my phone. She actually reached out her hand in anticipation but I discovered I didn't have my phone on me and nearly panicked because this kinda caught me off guard but I caught myself, laughed, and said "Well, I actually don't have my phone on me at the moment but hey, I'll see you around" before I parted I confirmed her name and she did the same to me and said "Good I'll remember now".

My question...when or if I see her again, how best do I approach for the number without coming off as desperate or needy. Should I just acknowledge her by name, make brief small talk, and then use my closer again but say something to the extent of "now that I have my phone on me this time I'll actually grab your number and we'll meet up for a run" or is their a better method?

Rsd Alex had this 4x approach. Essentially, you approach and re approach. See her again, chat her up. See her again. Repeat. Then, drop the invite. Statement of intent. Lead. Let her follow. Compliance is king. That's mystery method 101. That old notion of "leave her better than you found her" should be a by product of the approach. Your not micromanaging nor playing it safe. You already approached. Assumed familiarity the way you would had you already pulled. I've had similar situations. You can slow play it and it fizzles out or it amplifies the pickup. As in, the fire burns out or blows up. I had one with her phone and ready asking me for my IG. She searched for me which is funny. Notice silence. Girls stiff as a board. Might brush her hair or neck. A noob mistakes it for disinterest. Its sexual tension. You the man set pace. Lead her. Learn canned material and gambits you use to DISCREETLY ACQUIRE NUMBERS, DIGITS, IG, ETC. Assume that you have 30secs, maybe 60 tops. Make the most of your time. Be poised. Be confident. Enthusiasm. Not dancing monkey but energetic.

Lastly, the focal point is REFERENCE EXPERIENCE. obv you want digits and to follow up. More important than her digits is the reference experience here and the follow-up with OTHER GIRLS.

@nordic mate, life's too ****in boring not to try. Act accordingly.

Update us.

 

[crosscheck1331]

If you felt it went well why not have said 'well I actually forgot my phone, but how about you text me and we can talk later. This my phone number #######'. Something to that effect. If there was any interest she would have texted you her number when you asked on the spot.

Anyway, next time you see her I would just approach her an say hi. It's not as if you haven't talked before - nothing to fear. Good luck brother.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

If you felt it went well why not have said 'well I actually forgot my phone, but how about you text me and we can talk later. This my phone number #######'. Something to that effect. If there was any interest she would have texted you her number when you asked on the spot.

Anyway, next time you see her I would just approach her an say hi. It's not as if you haven't talked before - nothing to fear. Good luck brother.

1+

This! Make it a no issue. As in, just another day at the office. Nonchalant approach. Indifference. Aloof. The more you try to make it the perfect approach, the worst it will be. Pickup is messy. Its random. Moreover, reward favors the bold.

Give us a update @Nordic_identity. More importantly, after getting digits/ig (note the following is in the affirmative), go get more baeeeees after. Stack! Always. Move the things forward. Role-playing is fun. Even something as basic as her being that girl that is/does _________-_- whatever. Bait her. Its you and her vs the world. Seed the pull. Initially, open ended. Banter. Fluff covo. Flirt. Spike emotions. On a high note, "i g2g" back step. Again, bait her. Shift gears. Close ended. Tell her what you are doing. When. Tell her to ***.

Its a game of chance and testing compliance. Good luck.

 

[Nordic_identity]

1+

This! Make it a no issue. As in, just another day at the office. Nonchalant approach. Indifference. Aloof. The more you try to make it the perfect approach, the worst it will be. Pickup is messy. Its random. Moreover, reward favors the bold.

Give us a update @Nordic_identity. More importantly, after getting digits/ig (note the following is in the affirmative), go get more baeeeees after. Stack! Always. Move the things forward. Role-playing is fun. Even something as basic as her being that girl that is/does _________-_- whatever. Bait her. Its you and her vs the world. Seed the pull. Initially, open ended. Banter. Fluff covo. Flirt. Spike emotions. On a high note, "i g2g" back step. Again, bait her. Shift gears. Close ended. Tell her what you are doing. When. Tell her to ***.

Its a game of chance and testing compliance. Good luck.

Update:

Finally saw her again I was walking into the grocery store. Made my approach, small talked her about her weekend and week. I then asked if she'd still be up for a run. She said yes, and to just let her know. That's when I number closed and said "Well since I have my phone on me this time, haha, I'll grab your number and let you know when I'm available". She put the number in my phone, we talked about different areas to run around the area and I said I'll hit you up soon.

This was last night, figured I'd send my first text opener around noon today. Any tips on openers, flow of conversation and how quickly I should schedule a run with her?

 

[Nordic_identity]

Any recommendations on text game or threads anyone can link would be great! I'll use search function.

 

[bat soup]

I saw this girl in my local grocery store that caught my eye months ago. I had a brief interaction with her when I went through the line she was working but nothing significant just simple friendly small talk. I planned to try to expand upon this the next time I saw her but actually had success picking up another girl and got into a one year relationship that I felt moved too quickly for my interest and we recently broke up.

Recently I noticed this girl that previously caught my attention still worked at the same grocery store and I put my fear aside me and approached her while she was doing inventory in an aisle.

The conversation went well and she even asked me follow up questions to the questions I was asking about her. Turns out we have a mutual interest in running and I asked if she had ran any of the trails around town. She said she mostly runs on the roads since she doesn't know the trail scene very well. I told her I could show her some cool places to run around town and then said we should meet up for a run sometime. I then said I won't hold you up but before I leave I'll grab your number real quick and started to reach for my phone. She actually reached out her hand in anticipation but I discovered I didn't have my phone on me and nearly panicked because this kinda caught me off guard but I caught myself, laughed, and said "Well, I actually don't have my phone on me at the moment but hey, I'll see you around" before I parted I confirmed her name and she did the same to me and said "Good I'll remember now".

My question...when or if I see her again, how best do I approach for the number without coming off as desperate or needy. Should I just acknowledge her by name, make brief small talk, and then use my closer again but say something to the extent of "now that I have my phone on me this time I'll actually grab your number and we'll meet up for a run" or is their a better method?

You should have asked her to write it down for you or give her yours. It sounds like you got a bit nervous and ejected. That's normal, but you should try to resist that urge because sometimes it's hard to get the opportunity to talk in private again. Next time, since you already talked about it, just say something like "hey, how are you?", have a bit of a conversation and then say "I remembered my phone this time" and give it to her so that she can put in her number.

 

[Nordic_identity]

You should have asked her to write it down for you or give her yours. It sounds like you got a bit nervous and ejected. That's normal, but you should try to resist that urge because sometimes it's hard to get the opportunity to talk in private again. Next time, since you already talked about it, just say something like "hey, how are you?", have a bit of a conversation and then say "I remembered my phone this time" and give it to her so that she can put in her number.

Refer to the update. I actually did get her number last night with the exact technique.

Now I am binding my time before texting her wonder what my opener should be and how quickly I should schedule something with her.

 

[bat soup]

Update:

Finally saw her again I was walking into the grocery store. Made my approach, small talked her about her weekend and week. I then asked if she'd still be up for a run. She said yes, and to just let her know. That's when I number closed and said "Well since I have my phone on me this time, haha, I'll grab your number and let you know when I'm available". She put the number in my phone, we talked about different areas to run around the area and I said I'll hit you up soon.

This was last night, figured I'd send my first text opener around noon today. Any tips on openers, flow of conversation and how quickly I should schedule a run with her?

OK, I see you already did what you needed to get the number. She probably is interested but you have to be careful to avoid making things too platonic. The run thing is just a pretext to meet up and you both know it, so you should have a plan on how to get her back to your place afterwards and find an excuse to get close to her and make a move.

 

[Lookatu]

Any recommendations on text game or threads anyone can link would be great! I'll use search function.

Keep the texting to a minimum since both of you had planned to run together anyways and save most of the convo for in person. She's already met you in person and is comfortable with meeting up with you.

I'm sure everyone will have advice and there's a lot that's going to be pouring in.

The only thing I'll say is, you're going to have to get sexual or touchy feely, go in for a kiss sooner than later and see where she stands on that front, or else the longer you stay neutral, the bigger chance for you to be friendzoned or viewed just as an "activity partner".

 

[RangerMIke]

Like the late great Doc Love always said, "You can have the best sales pitch in the world, but you have to close."

Best advice I can give anyone on getting a woman's phone number is to NEVER stand around and chit chat with a woman you are interested in. The best thing to do is to just STOP when things are going really well then say you'd like to keep talking but you are to run/get back with friends/say someone you needed to touch base with/leave for an appointment... it doesn't really matter what the excuse is and ask for her number.

Where guys screw up is they drag conversations out too long and talk women out of liking them. It's always best to get her one on one then try to make something happen on an actual date. You have to keep them wanting more or there is no reason for her to meet you.

I was at a holiday party with a friend of mine about 10 months ago and there was this woman there just giving him the eye... I told him he should go talk to her since she was giving him CLEAR approach signals... he did, and he ended up talking to her the rest of the evening. At first I could tell she was REALLY interested in him, then though the night I would look over and her eyes were starting to wander around the room. When we left I asked him how it went... He thought he'd done really well and really like her and got her number... "Great!" I said, "You guys were talking for a couple of hours. What did you talk about." He said, his divorce (Ugh!), his crappy apartment (yeah, that always works with chicks), his job that he hates.... his broken car.... and she was bitching about sh1t as well.

Than I bet him a bottle of Jimmy Walker Blue Label he would not get her on a date... He didn't but I'm not going to insist the bet, told him to get his car fixed and stop b1tching about it.

Get in, get the number, get out. For God's sake NEVER talk about negative sh1t.... that is the fastest road to nothing I can think of.