"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Got the # to oneitis girl

PectoralisMajor

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Well done for giving it a go. Practicing is the best way to gain confidence and learn from your mistakes.

It looks as if you made some here:

1) texting 1st instead of calling
2) phoning and playing your game ( which was never going to work)
3) the bf phoning back and you not handling him appropriately
4) asking for advice from others and then doing your own thing anyway ( whats the point?)
5) Whether she had a bf or not in the 1st place is irrelevant...make friends with her, take her out, show her what a great guy you are, flirt with her,have fun. Its from there that things develop...
6) Stop placing this girl so high in the charts.

I realise your not going to like the advice above, and you'l probably think what you did was the only way to go about it. I know, because I used to be the same when I was 17. Looking at the way this went, your not far off that age I bet.....
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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The Sperminator

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Whatever you do do not I repeat do not call her back and apologize. She probably doesn't know who called and if she does you still don't apologize. You will come off either creepy or like a wuss. Just act like it never happen. Dude just move on we all know it won't work out and you guys are still in high school. There are lots of girls in college man just forget her.
 

DJ1234

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PectoralisMajor said:
Well done for giving it a go. Practicing is the best way to gain confidence and learn from your mistakes.

It looks as if you made some here:

1) texting 1st instead of calling
2) phoning and playing your game ( which was never going to work)
3) the bf phoning back and you not handling him appropriately
4) asking for advice from others and then doing your own thing anyway ( whats the point?)
5) Whether she had a bf or not in the 1st place is irrelevant...make friends with her, take her out, show her what a great guy you are, flirt with her,have fun. Its from there that things develop...
6) Stop placing this girl so high in the charts.

I realise your not going to like the advice above, and you'l probably think what you did was the only way to go about it. I know, because I used to be the same when I was 17. Looking at the way this went, your not far off that age I bet.....
I understand the advice you gave me but all except
#3. I don't see how I was suppose to handle him appropriately on the spur of the moment like that when I actually know the guy. What was I suppose to say hey D**K head who is this? And just make up something like this is her cousin so how about you give the phone back to her?

#4 I asked and no one responded, I actually took someones advice here who said to go for it.
Ive thought about

#5 but I def. don't want to fall in the LJBF zone

#6 although she is an HB9 she isn't so high on my charts now atleast ive made it clear to her and that I don't really give her any attention at all..I literraly flat out ignore her sometimes also. its kinda strange I really talk to her at random times...but I don't know if I should stop doing that and start being consistent...
 

DJ1234

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The Sperminator said:
Whatever you do do not I repeat do not call her back and apologize. She probably doesn't know who called and if she does you still don't apologize. You will come off either creepy or like a wuss. Just act like it never happen. Dude just move on we all know it won't work out and you guys are still in high school. There are lots of girls in college man just forget her.

yes I would NEVER appoligize for calling her. Even if she got offended (which I doubt since she was kinda laughing before she hung up).







Right now I have made the unanimous decision to move on unless she initiates some sort of action or contact.


Its done guys from this point on no more telling me to move the F**K on any more guys its starting to piss me off, :mad: but I do appreciate your advice so keep that coming.
 

Modro

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First of all im not trying to be harsh, you will realise later this is for your own good...


Seriously my friend step back and listen to what your saying, pretending to be her cousin? cold calling... she didnt know who the **** it was and it was just flat out weird. You are obsessed with her and it is never EVER going to happen the way your acting.

Second dont ever apologise for your actions fair enough you made some weak attempt at something you wanted i shall give you praise for that but it was awful dont play stupid ****, get the number properly next time, call her ask her out somewhere, she will say yes or no

Read the bible, Pook is good and Weapons of mass seduction you need to get clued up and move on, just pray she didnt know it was you. I know you probably wont listen to others like myself here and do what you want but afterwards hopfully you will learn.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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DJ1234

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Modro said:
First of all im not trying to be harsh, you will realise later this is for your own good...


Seriously my friend step back and listen to what your saying, pretending to be her cousin? cold calling... she didnt know who the **** it was and it was just flat out weird. You are obsessed with her and it is never EVER going to happen the way your acting.

Second dont ever apologise for your actions fair enough you made some weak attempt at something you wanted i shall give you praise for that but it was awful dont play stupid ****, get the number properly next time, call her ask her out somewhere, she will say yes or no

Read the bible, Pook is good and Weapons of mass seduction you need to get clued up and move on, just pray she didnt know it was you. I know you probably wont listen to others like myself here and do what you want but afterwards hopfully you will learn.
First off I was just insinuating that I had no idea what to say and how exactly was I suppose to respond to her bf? I wouldn't of said that this was her cousin which is why i just hung up.

Second, I will get her # properly next time around that is well understood

I've read the bible and everything in that damn section many times around and I am listening but I guess im just not getting it? :mad: :confused:
 

Modro

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http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/Downloads/The Book of Pook.pdf

go through all of that, a couple of sections at a time and read them properly, at the moment you have Oneitus for the girl, trust me we have ALL been there, flat out she isnt interested in you, dont listen to what they say, its about their actions towards you...

You are the catch you have to take what you want and not dance around waiting, but you also have to realise when it is a fruitless task and just stop thinking about them and move on there is always another out there.

Just concentrate on yourself for a bit, go to the gym and just practice some of the things on here and ingrain them into your normal behaviour..

currently i am doing a self improvement 'quest' and i find it very helpful to set goals each week and slowly build up,

for example

Go gym 3 times
arrange to go out with friends during the week
Start playing a sport
go out to a club
eye contact and smile at strangers
etc

you keep some each week such as the gym, and playing what ever sport/hobbie you do and build up from eye contact smiles to saying hi, to having a light conversation to going for a number, then just follow what Pook says its hard and you have to work at it.
 

BlackJackal

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DJ1234 said:
^
yea I know but do you think I should atleast confess who this is? She clearly knows who I am, just probably didn't know who it was over the phone? I mean, I could always tell her I was just joking with her over the phone....

But let me ask you guys a question, do you think she would have guessed my name if her bf wasn't there with her? She clearly is interested in me or atleast she was the last time I saw her.
Of course she didn't know who it was, you didn't tell her. Why would you joke around in the first place? No she would not have guess, and she didn't want to guess, hence the bf answering.
 

DJ1234

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BlackJackal said:
Of course she didn't know who it was, you didn't tell her. Why would you joke around in the first place? No she would not have guess, and she didn't want to guess, hence the bf answering.
yeah I know thats what i figured....I think she might of had an idea who it was just because she could probably tell by my voice but she never assumes anything even if she knows, she always confirms it (this is in everything she pretty much says). I'm pretty sure you're right about the bf answering but it seemed like she just probably explained that someone just called her and blah blah, which was then im sure that the bf said to call back and that is when he grabbed the phone and said that...thats what it sounded like from what I could tell...
 

DJDamage

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You BLOW IT!

DJ1234 said:
I did built rapport with her but never went for the digits because I was an AFC at the time. Eventually I lost all complete contact with her and have not seen her since. I had thought that she and her bf had broken up and I some how got her number through a friend.
So I called her and the conv. went something like this

Me: Hey is this _________ ?
Her: yea, whose is this?
Me: Hey whats up?
Her: nothing
Me: Are you doing anything right now?
Her: no, whose is this?!
Me: Do you have any idea who this might be?
Her: umm...no
Me: How about you guess
Her: Ummmm... I dont know
Her: how about you call me back and tell me who this is
Me: ok
*hang up*
*phone rings*
Me: hello?
Her:
hello?
*gives phone to her bf*
Him: hey I don't know who this is but don't ever call this phone again
Me: hang up SH*T!!!!!

Please read through the thread and the responses to determine what I should do please.
First of you don't get a number of her's from a friend. You want her? you go after her! you ask her for a number yourself and don't act like a pvssy. Based on her reaction you would have known how she felt about you and not second guess everything. You acted like a pvssy by trying to get a shortcut and is it ever wonder this blow up in your face? You are now officialy a stalker.

DJ1234 said:
This is the first time ive ever attempted to contact her so I see it as two options....

1. Call her back and explain that I was just joking and confess to her who this really is and ask her if she wants to hang out sometime probably "as friends" (now that I know her bf and her got back together)

2. Act like it never happned ill probably never see her in my life again unless I actually try to initiate contact with her and then only if I do see her again I ask her for her # and start from there?...

i'm really leaning towards option #1 but in your honest opinion what do you guys strongly suggest I do?...For the sake of my rep and ego..I honestly don't want to look like a desperate jack @$$......
You are already looking like a despereate jack ass by still hanging to your oneitis. As I said before you blow it, there is nothing you can do that will make you recover with her. The only thing you can do is forget about her and go after other chicks.

Oh and FYI just because a chick says she has a boyfriend does not mean game over, next time don't despair and go for it as if she didn't have a boyfriend.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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