Got her email, then I IM'ed her, no reponse

[static]

I got this HBs email (AOL address) 3-4 weeks ago at the University Library. What happened is that she declined my request for her number. She responded with "um, I can give you my email." I said "OK, that's cool."

Today I finally put her on my buddy list and it happened that she was online. So IM'ed her with "Hey HB " I didn't get a response and I was on for awhile. I went back on several hours later, she was no longer online, so I thought maybe she'd email, but she didn't.

Should I NEXT her now? or give her another chance?

Comments? Suggestions?

 

[E-Z Rider]

You should have nexted her when she rejected your request for her number. She gave you the e-mail as a 'consolation prize'. Honestly, if she dug you at ALL, why would she give you her e-mail instead of the phone #? "Plus," she thinks, "I won't even have to actually READ the e-mails."

You should have just said, "No thanks, have a good day" and left graciously when she offered the e-mail.

To add to that- you waited 3-4 weeks to even IM her? What were you thinking? If you had ANY chance at all of scoring with that e-mail addy, you would've had to use it within a day or two for her to even recall your existence.

Right now, you're just some sketchy wierdo trying to get with her over the internet. Next her and try again, and this time don't settle for an e-mail addy and don't wait a stupidly long time to contact her.

Good luck- -E-Z

 

[fezz]

In the future I wouldnt try to talk to people online. You never can really tell how they are saying what they were saying. And sorry to say, but I think she was just letting you down easy when she gave you her email address.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by fezz
In the future I wouldnt try to talk to people online. You never can really tell how they are saying what they were saying. And sorry to say, but I think she was just letting you down easy when she gave you her email address.

And you don't think that people will lie to your face? Get real. Guys that don't go in for the close or settle for some BS like an email address are AFC whether they are online or not.

Here's something to consider, why even ask for a phone number? If the girl is into you, why not just ask her out? I can never guess why guys half step and accept just an email address or phone number.

Static, you got the best lesson taught to you. Even face to face, if a woman is truly interested in you, she will make herself easily available to you. Remember that no matter if you meet face to face or online.

 

[ToP DoN]

whats her aim screen name...maybe shell respond to a fvckin man instead of a little whiny girl like u

 

[static]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia


Here's something to consider, why even ask for a phone number? If the girl is into you, why not just ask her out? I can never guess why guys half step and accept just an email address or phone number.

I've considered asking a girl out, but I usually don't know when I'll have time for it. I don't think asking her out without providing a date and time would work unless things are really going. For example, if you two have a common activity of interest and you say "we should do [the activity] sometime."

I have considered other ways without the activity, such as the following, but rejected them.

I'm against using "would you like to hang out some time" because it gives them the opportunity to say NO and it more clearly exposes that you can't commit to something.

I've also felt like asking them "do you want to go out with me," but I never do because that sounds grade-school-ish.

 

[Mr.Fortesque]

Originally posted by ToP DoN
whats her aim screen name...maybe shell respond to a fvckin man instead of a little whiny girl like u

hey, slow down! he is just a novice, two years ago I would be happy with her mail, too

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

When she refused to give up the number you should have written her off right then and there.

This is the "home phone number test" and she must pass without any excuses.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by static
I've considered asking a girl out, but I usually don't know when I'll have time for it. I don't think asking her out without providing a date and time would work unless things are really going. For example, if you two have a common activity of interest and you say "we should do [the activity] sometime."

I have considered other ways without the activity, such as the following, but rejected them.

I'm against using "would you like to hang out some time" because it gives them the opportunity to say NO and it more clearly exposes that you can't commit to something.

I've also felt like asking them "do you want to go out with me," but I never do because that sounds grade-school-ish.

You were smart not to use those two examples, you were right about the reasons why too. Here's something to think about when considering asking a woman out. Don't focus so much on the activity, that's a bit AFC.

Putting the emphasis on the activity is like asking a woman out to dinner just to be able to spend time with her, as if buying something for her will make her IL go up. It may but it's based on how much you do for her.

If you play your game right, she will want to hang out with you no matter what you plan to do. Think about it, imaging the IL of a woman who is willing to go with you to take your dog for a walk, to pick up your books for the upcoming semester, to go grocery shopping, it's your choice.

Focus on raising her interest level really high first and then you are able to say "I'm going to be walk my dog tonight, come keep me company." Did you ask her? NO! You made a statement in a matter of fact type of way as if you knew she was going to say yes. Talk about showing confidence...