Got caught lying..how to fix it

[BlackDragon]

I got caught lying. I lied about when was the last time i had sex and a few other things about my past. I been talking to this gurl a few weeks on the phone and myspace before we met. Everthing was in the past...and I never cheated on her...but on myspace this gurl i dated before got jeaslous becuase i dumped her for my new gurl. She told her everything and set me up. I wasn't messing with them at the same time...but the point is...I lied about a few things and that gurl told on me.

She broke it off with me at the club where I was set up but i wrote a email explaining everything and why I lied. She called back the next day crying and we were on the phone for about 2 hours. I ask her if I could call her tomorrow and she said yes. I guess there is still some hope of fixing this.....you guys have any advice? What could I say or do? Never been in this situation before.

 

[aliasguy]

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Deny, Deny, Deny.

You already messed up writing an email "explaining."

So now, stick PRECISELY to whatever you wrote in the email. Never waver. REFUSE to "explain." Say, if you HAVE to, "I already TOLD you what happened in that email. I don't want to discuss this anymore." And, then, just SHUT up about it all. Don't fall into the trap of being cross-examined. Women are better at this than us. You will lose, if you talk too much. And, if you MUST speak, stick as close as you you can to the real truth. (WITHOUT admitting anything else.)

For future reference. DON'T discuss this kind of thing in an email exchange. Paper trails are rough to cover.

For next time, remember .... DENY DENY DENY. Call the other chick a jealous liar if you have to. But, DENY.

(BTW, everyone, I DON'T like to lie to women. But in a situation like this, with a third party starting sh*t, ya gotta do what ya gotta do.)

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[BlackDragon]

they gurl had

 

[BlackDragon]

the gurl had proof thur messages i wrote to that other gurl on yahoo messanger and myspace.

So what should i say to her today...just stick to what I said before and try to meet up with her or something? Im not a very good smooth talker...so i dont know what to say. Our last conversation was mostly awkward silences and her sniffing, crying for 2 hours.

 

[aliasguy]

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Not sure what you're asking.

Bottom line is----STICK to whatever you've told her. DON'T change your story. And REFUSE to discuss it further. That's the key.

It will blow over if you're cool about it and don't dig a deeper hole.

Don't fall into the trap of talking about it more.

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[DonJuan11]

I got caught lying. I lied about when was the last time i had sex and a few other things about my past. I been talking to this gurl a few weeks on the phone and myspace before we met.

She broke it off with me at the club where I was set up but i wrote a email explaining everything and why I lied. She called back the next day crying and we were on the phone for about 2 hours.

She cryed because you lied about some things in the past?

Either she is very unstable or you look like Brad.

I'm guessing the former.

 

[BlackDragon]

ok I'll just call her today to try to set up something to see her. Right now im trying to fix my mistakes....try to get out of the hole I dug myself. So basically i should stick to what i already said and say nothing more about it. I should just leave it as it is and hope she would see me again.

 

[aliasguy]

ok I'll just call her today to try to set up something to see her. Right now im trying to fix my mistakes....try to get out of the hole I dug myself. So basically i should stick to what i already said and say nothing more about it. I should just leave it as it is and hope she would see me again.

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Don't apologize, don't explain anymore. Don't TRY to get out of the hole, just pretend the "hole" isn't there. If she brings it up, say, "I thought we already covered that." AND NOTHING ELSE.

And, dude, don't "hope" she'll see you again. Jesus. Either she will or she won't. Don't go HOPING about it.



Another, more experienced guy on here, that I respect, would advise you to "spin more plates."

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[BlackDragon]

OK i called her....

I stuck with yal advice and stuck with my story. I told her that I missed her and would want to see her tonight...she agreed and said that she missed me too but told me not to expect anything. I really like this gurl. I willing to miss football to go see her 45 mins away.

I really dont know what to say or do. Come on guys...I need some more advice on what to do.

 

[KarmaSutra]

This is complete idiocy

Karmic Law #21 - Always tell the truth. You'll never regret it and it has the added benefit of being the easiest thing to remember. It also builds character.

If you lie and bullsh!t around not only does it completely fvck your integrity but ruins your credibility, which you can never EVER get back.

You guys give really sh!tty advice. Deny deny deny is for fools and immature children.

 

[penkitten]

i dont even know what it matters what you did before you met her....
there is a long thread in the achieve about how to answer "how many people have you been with before"
you should just say a select few and leave it at that.

there are other long threads about not im'ing, texting etc the women you date. part of the reason is because they can use whatever you write to them as a tool. they can re read it whenever, read whatever they want into it and later show it to anyone they choose.
there is a reason that these guys wrote those threads.

please use the search button and read them.

nevertheless, you can not go back in the way back machine and erase what has already been done. learn from this and grow from it.

 

[BlackDragon]

Status Report:::

Ok I went to go see her a few hours ago. Met her at the trainstation talked a bit....I told her how i feel about her setting me up...and she felt bad about it....so i basically switch it back on her. We decided to go to the sports bar...so i could watch the football games :-D Everything was going great...you know...holding hands...hugging...playing around with each other. It was a good night. But I made a bad...bad...mistake. I start reaching in my pockets for my chap stick...lol...and guess what. My cell phone fell off of my pockets. And guess what she did.....yeah you guess it. Went thru my messages. I thought it was ok because i had nothing to hide....but i forgot that I got a message from my ex. She wanted to meet up again and I sent a message back saying ok. This really pissed her off..when she saw that message....it felt like I was back at square one. I have good luck huh

 

[BlackDragon]

I really like this gurl and I hope everything turns out ok....but its going to be hard..because she is always suspecting me..thinking im a player or something because I usually have a lot of gurls around me. Im seeing her tomorrow...hope everything would be better this time.....i know one more mistake its...over.