"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Got a bloody STI :(

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Dan08

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Been having casual secz with a girl recently, last time being monday. Anyways come tuesday it ****ing hurts to piss, things are real nasty and straight away I'm like **** this **** I'm getting this looked at.

Well lads it turns out the bird went and gave me gonorreha...charming!

Being at the fragile age of 19 and only a handful of sexual partners this was my first STI and **** me was I ****ting it!

In case you don't know the test for it is they insert a swab up your jap's eye (christ that stung) and then upon finding it they inject you in the arse.
I **** you not.....

Now I've gotta get this girl round and explain how she likely has gonorreha without explicity saying she gave it to me. Fun.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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DragonBlood

DragonBlood

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Dan08 said:
Ive gotta get this girl round and explain how she likely has gonorreha without explicity saying she gave it to me. Fun.
Click to expand...

Whats with the nice guy act? This women does not owe your respect.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Iceberg

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Dan08 said:
Been having casual secz with a girl recently, last time being monday. Anyways come tuesday it ****ing hurts to piss, things are real nasty and straight away I'm like **** this **** I'm getting this looked at.

Well lads it turns out the bird went and gave me gonorreha...charming!

Being at the fragile age of 19 and only a handful of sexual partners this was my first STI and **** me was I ****ting it!

In case you don't know the test for it is they insert a swab up your jap's eye (christ that stung) and then upon finding it they inject you in the arse.
I **** you not.....

Now I've gotta get this girl round and explain how she likely has gonorreha without explicity saying she gave it to me. Fun.
Click to expand...

A swab up the wang and a injection in your arse? Sounds like your doctor's performing experiments on you.

Over here, the routine is, you go to the doc's explain your symptoms, and they give you antibiotics for chlamydia AND gonorrhea since both have similar symptoms.

I mean, they make you piss in a cup too just to check on what the infection is....but haven't heard of any friends getting a swab in their d-hole.

Anywho, this would be solved if you wore a condom. Funny how a split second decision can have big consequences....Just count your blessings that it's nothing permanent.

And yea...tell the girl. No point in her going out and infecting the rest of the town too.
 
B

betheman

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Dan08 said:
Been having casual secz with a girl recently, last time being monday. Anyways come tuesday it ****ing hurts to piss, things are real nasty and straight away I'm like **** this **** I'm getting this looked at.

Well lads it turns out the bird went and gave me gonorreha...charming!

Being at the fragile age of 19 and only a handful of sexual partners this was my first STI and **** me was I ****ting it!

In case you don't know the test for it is they insert a swab up your jap's eye (christ that stung) and then upon finding it they inject you in the arse.
I **** you not.....

Now I've gotta get this girl round and explain how she likely has gonorreha without explicity saying she gave it to me. Fun.
Click to expand...
she will deny it, she must have caught it off you!
gonorreha is rampant among your age group at present and it will go away but can be very nasty, dont fvck with your health, are you up north by any chance?
 
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Epimanes

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Maybe you gave it to her? And if you been fvcking other women too they likely have It now also. No sex now til its cleared up and you finish all your meds.
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Gonorrhea is frequently asymptomatic. When symptoms do appear they may show up as early as two days after exposure, or take as long as one month.
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Always remember. Put a wrapper on your zapper! Lol
 
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Dan08

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Just to clarify fellas, condom was used throughout. This was likely transmitted via oral on her part.

@betheman. I'm not mate, I'm in the south right now.

@Epimans, I didn't mate. The symptoms that I got checked were sudden. 2 days from last intercourse and prior to sleeping with this girl I hadn't had any form of sexual contact with a girl since October.
So nah mate, this one's on her.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Epimanes

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Yeah.. You can get it via oral, vaginal and anal.
 
Greasy Pig

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Fvck. Gonorrhea from a damn *******? And it's resistant to drugs??
Eddie Murphy in Delirious was right: it's going to get to the point where you'll stick your dyck in a woman and just spontaneously combust.
 
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Dan08

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Update

Just an update,

Spoke to the girl face to face etc, explained timing meant she'd given me the STI and that she needed to get checked pronto. Tbf she handled it really well, she was genuinely sorry and I felt it was a step in the right direction. So now she just needs to get checked etc and I'm on my way to recovery so it's all good folks.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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