"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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good or bad, im probably gonna have to blow off our date

montybrown

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so I'm supposed to do something Monday night with this chick I got a number from. she told me she will call me Monday to do something. But now that I think of it, there is really nothing to do on a Monday night seeing as I finish work about 9pm.... then I start work the next day at 8:30. I'm gonna probably have to blow her off... Will this piss her off? I was thinking I could make it seem like I'm really busy and she would strive to get me available. Thing is I really want to do something with her but there just isn't much to do on Monday nights. I probably will call her (or if she calls me) tell her that I'm busy and will have to do something either Friday or Saturday night. Oh yeah, she blew me off on our date last night cause she says she has to get up at 5 in the morning the next day.....so I don't want her to think I'm doing it on purpose to get 'revenge' so to speak on her. But it depends, what can I really do on a monday night that would make her day? she tells me she has nothing better to do and she knows that I am very social so I believe that I have the upper hand on the social levels thus far.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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armadon

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There's plenty of things to do on a Monday night. Looks like you're making an excuse to not going out.
 

rsaini

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man...ur screwed!...tell her on Monday afternoon that your cousins have arrived unannounced and they will definitely be staying the night before they leave for disneyland (heh)... so "baby...dont get upset k...daddy's gonna take u out to TGI's on Friday!!.. :rock:
 

montybrown

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armadon said:
There's plenty of things to do on a Monday night. Looks like you're making an excuse to not going out.
no thats not it. i really want to go out with her it's just that she is only 20 so I am very limited on where to bring her. I don't want to go for the typical cliche 'dinner and a movie', we can possibly go get some dinner but then after that, what? If it were a Friday-Weekend at least more places would be open till 4 in the morning but as far as monday nights are concerned I really have no idea since most places close early. I want to be sure our first date will be memorable and that way when I take her home she will want to do something with me again.
 

The Sperminator

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Take her to like Down Town Disney or the Block or something like that. As gay as it might sound just take her there and walk around and talk. Works for me.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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montybrown said:
so I'm supposed to do something Monday night with this chick I got a number from. she told me she will call me Monday to do something. But now that I think of it, there is really nothing to do on a Monday night seeing as I finish work about 9pm.... then I start work the next day at 8:30. I'm gonna probably have to blow her off... Will this piss her off? ...
Dude, she's already a half a step away from blowing you off. You've put her into a place of having you wait on her decision whether or not she finds something more interesting to do and then call you as a last resort to appease her boredom.

Good gosh man, if you choose to do something else before something is confirmed between the two of you too bad for her! There's no need to schedule your life around hers, nice guys do that. Next time, confirm a date, if things are up in the air proceed as if nothing is planned. Wait, nothing is planned!
 

kingwilliam

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Take her to a sports bar and watch the second half of Monday night Football........drink a beer or two, get to know her, and then take her back to your place and **** her.
 

montybrown

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Dude, she's already a half a step away from blowing you off. You've put her into a place of having you wait on her decision whether or not she finds something more interesting to do and then call you as a last resort to appease her boredom.

Good gosh man, if you choose to do something else before something is confirmed between the two of you too bad for her! There's no need to schedule your life around hers, nice guys do that. Next time, confirm a date, if things are up in the air proceed as if nothing is planned. Wait, nothing is planned!

I guess. It really doesn't bother me. She was the one who wanted to go out with me another day when I had already planned something for her and she told me Monday night and I told her to call me because I'm not wasting my time calling her. I'm too busy dealing with many women. If she calls me, great. If she doesn't call me. NEXT. That's her loss. She seems like a very boring girl so if she doesn't want to get to know me like I already told her then it's her loss. We'll see what happens today and if she doesn't call then, next.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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montybrown said:
...and I told her to call me because I'm not wasting my time calling her. I'm too busy dealing with many women. ...
So what's the problem? You should be busy by now. Go out a live!
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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BAMBU

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Listen, Monday nights are perfect to go out, i rather go out with a girl during the week Mon Thru Thur Than on a Friday Or Saturday Also Sunday are good days
 

Tazman

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montybrown said:
she tells me she has nothing better to do
Is it just me or does this not sound very flattering? In fact, I'd almost take that as an insult. What interested person would say something like that?
 

J-Bone

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montybrown said:
we can possibly go get some dinner but then after that, what?QUOTE]


:nono: omg you didnt say and then what :kick: hmmm lemme think you could park somewhere, go by your place to get something oh god you forgot what it was help me look figure what it is ;), go riding dirt roads since it sounds like you may be from a small town like me, or drive to the nearest city, go shroom picking god figure out something, you dont even have to spend any money besides for gas and theres plenty to do.
 

montybrown

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Tazman said:
Is it just me or does this not sound very flattering? In fact, I'd almost take that as an insult. What interested person would say something like that?
yea fvck that sh!t, she needs to show me some respect before she gets the pleasure of my company. She's Nexted already.

I gave her a call about 8pm, no answer. Left a simple message saying "hey this is...call me when you get this message"

she never returned my call. my message was short yet effective because I didn't give much information and it could've been me calling to tell her I didn't want to do sh!t with her anyway, so it doesn't make me look desperate for her and that I am busy with other things.

I'm not calling her again. she's trying to play these games with me already. She should've never gave me her number in the first place, but I guess I was right... She felt she had to give it to me because I didn't ask her "Can I.." I was in control.

*throws number away*

Never compromise your pride for any girl. When you walk away from one hot girl there's an even hotter one waiting around the corner.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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