Going to a bar or a club alone, what to do ?

[breakthatcage]

Hello,

I don't know anybody in the city where I live and the only way that I can think of to meet people is to go to club and bars but I don't want to just stand there not knowing what to do with myself. To make matters more complicated I can't dance.

What do you usually do when going to a bar or a club alone ?

 

[Serenity]

Haven't been alone, but I'm anywhere in the club except where my friends are. Just walk around and start conversations, sooner or later you will meet someone interesting.

 

[LandingWood]

Haven't been alone, but I'm anywhere in the club except where my friends are. Just walk around and start conversations, sooner or later you will meet someone interesting.

This. Take the social initiative.

 

[XY.]

I fly solo 95 percent of the time. I also travel a lot so when I get to a new place I game some guys and attach to their group. Sorta like a home base. Whenever a female catches my eye I peel off and do my thing. If I fail then I go back to home base and wait until I see someone else. If she complies then I get my lay

 

[skinnyguy]

i found that chicks are more likely to approach you if you are alone at the bar/club rather than with friends. girls will tell you their friend thinks your cute/hot or simply open up themselves. be prepared for being asked why you're there alone.

Huh????

If you're alone they will assume you're a friendless loser and ignore the hell out of you...

 

[Stort_Brød]

maybe in your case. but never in mine

absolutely... you don't need friends to be interesting, attractive, the life of the party, suave, a Don Juan or anything man. When you are picking up girls are they interested in your group of friends that are sitting around wherever you left them to go talk to her? NO they are interested in YOU

and as Midnight City said

"are you here alone?"
"ya my friends g/f's dont let them play with me anymore"

come up with a witty answer to such a question and 9/10 she will be having a giggle and later giggling on your d!ck. It is all about how you control your presence and present yourself.

 

[kentgraham10]

absolutely... you don't need friends to be interesting, attractive, the life of the party, suave, a Don Juan or anything man. When you are picking up girls are they interested in your group of friends that are sitting around wherever you left them to go talk to her? NO they are interested in YOU

and as Midnight City said

"are you here alone?"
"ya my friends g/f's dont let them play with me anymore"

come up with a witty answer to such a question and 9/10 she will be having a giggle and later giggling on your d!ck. It is all about how you control your presence and present yourself.

THIS!!!!!!!

Does James Bond ever have to go out with a ****ing posse to get girls??

 

[Mike32ct]

Huh????

If you're alone they will assume you're a friendless loser and ignore the hell out of you...

It's a function of looks. A very good looking guy will be forgiven for being alone and can still be approached by women.

 

[apprenticedj]

First off don't worry about it, you got this! When flying solo I tend to prefer bars over clubs (specifically dive bars but I'm kinda low class lol), I find it more fruitful for recruiting. This is my method, get there a little earlier then you would if you're rolling with a group. Belly up to the bar and start chatting casually with the bartender while you're sizing the place up. If you're at a dive bar there are bound to be interesting characters there, usually sitting right next to you at the bar. After you've had a few drinks and you're feeling loose strike up a conversation with ANYBODY, guy, girl, old, young, black, white, doesn't matter. Just get talking and laughing. Now you'll be feeling great and your vibe will be noticable. Look friendly, smile, good posture, be approachable. One last thing: remember your goal is to have fun, that's it. Don't beat yourself up if you don't have five new numbers or you're not leaving with a hottie. Just enjoy yourself buddy.

 

[f283000]

I don't know anybody in the city where I live and the only way that I can think of to meet people is to go to club and bars but I don't want to just stand there not knowing what to do with myself. To make matters more complicated I can't dance.

You're doing it wrong brother.

Stop going to bars or clubs and instead take salsa lessons and start going salsa dancing. Google salsa lessons in your city and thank me later.

Salsa is very open, friendly, welcoming unlike bars and clubs. Your social circle will increase 1000% guaranteed unlike in bars and clubs, plus you will never have problems meeting women in your life ever again. In salsa even the shyest of guys end up becoming womanizers it is just too easy once you become a decent dancer. In fact you won't even need sosuave or any pua stuff anymore salsa will take care of all your needs in regards to getting women.

Take it from me I wasted the best years of my life going to clubs and bars and I wouldn't go back there even if you paid me. I thank the universe for bringing me to salsa

 

[HyperAnalyze]

Don't listen to the above advice.

Keep going out and make sure you addict yourself to positive emotions.

If you make your criteria for success either approaching girls and having fun. You always guarantee progress in your game.

Approach a lot, get reference experiences and most important be outcome independent.

 

[LiveFreeX]

Ummm Dance? Women go nuts for a guy who can dance... I know first hand.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTkxMDY0Mjg=.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzU0ODE3MTgw.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzYxMDQ5NjQ=.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzkxNDU5NTI4.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjMxMTYxMDgw.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzM5MDE5NzA4.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTIxNTI4MTky.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTEzMzA3ODIw.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjMxMTYwNTk2.html




When my wife dances, I damn near cream the dance floor. She looks like the chick on the left. I got her some dance DVDs for 5 bucks each and she practiced till she could fvckin out dance the women on the DVD... get a DVD.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTg4NTU0ODc2.html

Dancing is body language for dudes, and it says you are in CONTROL of yourself and the social situation, you bust out in front of people and you've got BALLS OF STEEL. Also practice some moves that get a girl out of your circle, b1tches will always try and bust in on your spotlight so they can shake their ass in front of you, have sh1t that wipes them out, gliding is good... moonwalk away from them. You should see my wife go, she does a popping thing that mocks them and basically says that they are slvts... all popping dance that my wife came up with herself, its rad.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTQ5NDY2OTE2_type_99.html <-- Popping

Big difference between the reception you get from girls when you want to fvck them versus when they want to fvck YOU. They get grabby. I run up against some monster ass competition here in Asia but back in America, you are lucky to find ONE guy at a nightclub that can move his feet.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTYxOTM1Nzgw.html <-- This is how I dance, my videos are on youtube somewhere, but I can't get to them cause I'm behind the Great Fire Wall.

The most important reason for dancing is it just FEELS great, I'd rather be dancing then fvcking any day of the week.

THERE IS A DANCE FLOOR AT NIGHT CLUBS FOR A REASON.

 

[breakthatcage]

Thanks for the advice ! I have been extremely busy with work lately so I didn't have the time or the energy to go out, I tried to go to a pub tonight but I didn't stay long because... I simply didn't know what to do with myself, I mean I couldn't stand at the bar and at the other side everybody was seated in groups, I really felt uncomfortable standing there alone not knowing what to do.

that is a big problem for me and I feel like i'm in a vicious circle, because I have no friends to go out with it takes a huge amount of energy to motivate myself to go out but even when I am motivated, I have no idea what to do which demotivates me. It's like if bars and clubs were designed for people in groups and I woud absolutely hate to be "that guy" standing there alone at a corner and pretending to have fun.

 

[FairShake]

Take up smoking. It seems like it's easier to meet people outside smoking than in a loud bar.

Also don't go to a club alone. That's for guys to fvck and girls to get fvcked. They aren't looking for friends to go out with later. I usually don't mind starting up new conversations but in clubs where I can't even hear the other person I'd rather not. At clubs it's about dancing and looking a girl in the eyes and very little about what you say.

Try bars instead, either sports bars or dive bars. Both are full of dudes just looking to relax, get away from the wife or girlfriend, have a beer, and talk sh!t. They would definitely be more receptive to conversation.

 

[MillionBillionaire]

... Salsa dancing eh? ... try out my new dj skills..

 

[breakthatcage]

Take up smoking. It seems like it's easier to meet people outside smoking than in a loud bar.

Also don't go to a club alone. That's for guys to fvck and girls to get fvcked. They aren't looking for friends to go out with later. I usually don't mind starting up new conversations but in clubs where I can't even hear the other person I'd rather not. At clubs it's about dancing and looking a girl in the eyes and very little about what you say.

Try bars instead, either sports bars or dive bars. Both are full of dudes just looking to relax, get away from the wife or girlfriend, have a beer, and talk sh!t. They would definitely be more receptive to conversation.

If by going out alone I could meet a lovely lady to fvck I wouldn't mind ! So I wouldn't rule out clubs but I don't know if it's the best environement for me if i'm alone. I will definitely think about MidnightCity's advice, after all it cannot be that complicated ! There's just a part of me that is conviced that going out alone means guaranteed boredom and awkwardness.

 

[Mike32ct]

Excellent post.




Man you need to remove that thinking from you head. I've been lone wolfing it for years and like others, my most memorable times is out by my damn self. This may help with your uncomfortableness.

Grab a seat at the bar or sit along an high traffic area. Have yourself a drink just say a simple hey how you doing to folks to break the ice. If no one catches your interest, just play on your phone until you find someone that does.

Solid advice.

I think grabbing a seat at the bar is very important for a lone wolf. Standing behind the seated people holding a drink by yourself is awkward.

While seated, you can also watch the TV screen if they have one. You can also order food if it's a bar and grill.

 

[CaptainSaveAh0]

Going alone can work to your advantage if you play your cards right. Be that interesting mysterious guy and it will play out well for you. Make sure to dress nice and look your best, not all girls will judge you if you are alone and if they ask, simply tell them you are new to the city. Go out have fun and meet some new ppl !