Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Going out alone without appearing creepy

Demystify

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I know an obvious piece of advice would be to actually talk to people and not sit alone in a corner ignoring people or staring at them. But is there any other good advice relating to this topic out there?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Jitterbug

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I used to go out as a lone wolf a fair bit (moving to a new city). My advice is to befriend the guys (& employees of the clubs if they aren't too busy) first. It's a hell lot easier. Don't go chat up the women from the get go. Once you've had sufficient social vibe going, then go chat to whomever you like. Make it a priority to make friends with the guys and soon enough you won't have to be the lone wolf.
 

edger

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Demystify said:
I know an obvious piece of advice would be to actually talk to people and not sit alone in a corner ignoring people or staring at them. But is there any other good advice relating to this topic out there?
Don't worry about going out alone. I always do it(at clubs). I also go out with friends too. But when my friends are not around, I go out alone. Of course I'd rather go out with a friend, but if they're not around, I'm not going to let it stop me from going out. I can't be bothered relying on people. A lot of my friends go out alone too. Going out alone has never been an issue with picking up women for me. Look confident, look pleased, look jovial, look like you're having a good time, and don't stand away from everyone, and you'll be fine.
 

amoka

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Are you a talker or a dancer. If you are none, then going out a lone can be difficult. Now, I'm not saying you should not go out alone if you do not have any of these skills.

I used to go out alone in my early days. Then, I was a fairly a good dancer. Upon entering a club, I usually walk straight to the dance floor, extend my hand to ANY woman standing a lone or dancing by her self. Or a group of woman dancing by themselves (if you can handle it.) Remember I did not say the most beautiful woman, but rather any women. You'd need her to worm up. Also, it build social proves by making other women jealous of you. A woman would be jealous of you dancing; regardless of who you are dancing with.

If you are a talker on go with the mentality of "making friends." That is right. You don't want to go to the club solo with the mentality of getting laid with the most sexiest girl around. You'd be disappointed, particularly if you are relatively new to the club scene.
Go there, talk fluff with anybody there. Anybody, men or women. By the time you know it, you made fewer than enough "friends" for you to have great time.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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LonesomeLoser

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Well I go out alone because I really don't have much interest in other people unless I want something from them. So I try to meet a woman because I want something from her (love, relationship, security). It seems perfectly logical to me. Unfortunately women aren't very logical.
 

Poonani Maker

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Going to church and socializing has made me a socializer who can ham it up with everybody for an entire night. Church IS different though because people serve one another there and submit to one another whereas in a bar or a club people, especially b1tches, can be unforgiving if you don't say the right things or wear the right clothes or have a million dollars etc.
 

TheEdgeOf

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You Know What, your problem isn't that you look creepy while going lone wolf, it's the fact that you actually care. Seriously buddy, what the hell? Who are those other people anyways? They're not you. YOU are the ONLY one that matters! Who gives a sh*t if THEY think you're creepy? Do you think you're creepy? If so, then there's your problem. If you feel comfortable doing what you're doing and give off a vibe that what you're doing is not creepy and is instead normal, then that vibe will rub off onto those around you, But if you think that you seem creepy, others will pick up on this and view you as creepy. People show their emotions a lot more than they're aware of. And humans pick up on them subconsciously much more than they think they do.

So go out there confidentially and do whatever the hell you want to do, but give it your all. Believe in yourself and everyone else will too.
 
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Poonani Maker said:
Going to church and socializing has made me a socializer who can ham it up with everybody for an entire night. Church IS different though because people serve one another there and submit to one another whereas in a bar or a club people, especially b1tches, can be unforgiving if you don't say the right things or wear the right clothes or have a million dollars etc.
Actually, the main place I'm trying to socialise with is at the church, and I feel the same way the OP is saying. I usually end up talking to someone at the church, but shy away from approaching and opening attractive girls.

Some ideas come to mind as openers (as I'm writing this post) - hey if talking to myself on here works, cool:

- Hi, how are you? How did you enjoy the service? Or how is your week?
Follow-up: dig up background info by fluff questions.
(eg. does her parents/family go there, how long has she being going, if she's in school or working, does she live around there...)

Just prior to leaving, appear that you are thinking about something, and go back and ask for her email/number.

The concept of getting background is to get a three-dimensional picture of her and a connection.


Wow, I'm getting brainstorms while writing this post -- but I still don't know how to open if there is a couple of girls or a mixed state.

- If they look similar, ask if they are related, or ask how the group is related with each other.

- say the same thing as if she was a lone wolf (why not?) How are you ladies doing? Did you enjoy the service.... etc...

Well, I've answered my own question.
 
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