Go out alone

[Hyper2010]

Just a quick one. I wondered whether any of you guys would ever go out to a club or bar alone. I've done it a few times in past and have always found I've git much more attention than when I'm in a group.

What are your thoughts?

 

[Zion]

I literally would not know what to do if I went to a club alone. I'd love to be able to do it though.

 

[rhythmic]

I myself wondered this a while ago. Then I gained confidence in it, stemming from a couple of times I went out with people, and then ended up by myself (my buddy got lucky, lost my friends, etc).

I like it.

 

[PlayHer Man]

Going alone is really the best way to go.

There are several downsides to going out in a group:

1. Friends with better game might steal female attention

2. Friends with horrible game will make bad wingmen

3. You'll get interrupted with drinks and shots your friends buy

4. The group lowers your motivation to interact with others

5. The group will judge the women you try to bang if they're not "hot enough". Thus, more pressure to only talk to the hottest girls rather than the easiest to f*ck.


While wingmen are helpful, they can hurt you if your girl is feeling you, but her friend(s) dislikes your wingman.

Going out alone gives you full control. You can come and go as you please. You don't have to take care of drunk friends. There is no pressure to drink more than you want to. There is no pressure to buy "rounds". You are not judged by which girls you try to f*ck. There is no "audience" just pure efficiency. Simply put.. you have no distractions.

Just if you go out alone.. go somewhere with high volume (numbers) and arrive later in the night after most of the AFC's have already intoxicated most of the girls and the place is officially "bumping". If you come too early the place will be dead and you'll have to kill time at the bar waiting for more girls to arrive.

 

[Hyper2010]

Good. The reason I ask is that most of my friends have moved away, stuck in with kiddiewinks, moved on etc so I don't have many people to go our with. I thibk the point,about arriving laters on when most people are already drunk is key

 

[Mike32ct]

PlayHer Man nailed it.

 

[Purefilth]

Going alone is really the best way to go.

There are several downsides to going out in a group:

1. Friends with better game might steal female attention

2. Friends with horrible game will make bad wingmen

3. You'll get interrupted with drinks and shots your friends buy

4. The group lowers your motivation to interact with others

5. The group will judge the women you try to bang if they're not "hot enough". Thus, more pressure to only talk to the hottest girls rather than the easiest to f*ck.


While wingmen are helpful, they can hurt you if your girl is feeling you, but her friend(s) dislikes your wingman.

Going out alone gives you full control. You can come and go as you please. You don't have to take care of drunk friends. There is no pressure to drink more than you want to. There is no pressure to buy "rounds". You are not judged by which girls you try to f*ck. There is no "audience" just pure efficiency. Simply put.. you have no distractions.

Just if you go out alone.. go somewhere with high volume (numbers) and arrive later in the night after most of the AFC's have already intoxicated most of the girls and the place is officially "bumping". If you come too early the place will be dead and you'll have to kill time at the bar waiting for more girls to arrive.

Knowledgable post here. When I sarge - I go solo.

If some girl asks where your friends are "oh they just left - I'm finishing my beer"
(simple to explain your lack of social proof)

you'll get a "come join ME"(not always)

or you can move on to the next.

I generally wont go and join another group - any guys in that group will set up into cawkblock mode:box:

But if the offers there, so's the interest and its up to YOU to charm her.

 

[LongLostFriend]

I would advise becoming a "regular" at a local or two. Get to know the bartenders on a first-name basis and get to the point where they know your usual drink, etc.

Make it "your turf."

 

[Sandow]

I'm in the same boat where all my friends have moved on and/or married and have kids. I'm pretty much forced to go solo now, but I do what LongLost Friend recommended, to befriend all the workers and even the "regulars."

I always like to hang out at the bar and as soon as a babe comes up to order a drink, it's game on. By doing this, you're not coming off as creepy either, it's just casual talk.

I used to feel weird, because girls would always ask where my friends were. But like others said, just say they left and went to another bar. And if it's crowded, they probably wouldn't even notice you're solo.

I went to Spain solo a few years ago, and I have to admit that was pretty hard. When I went with my buddy the first time, it was super easy. But as long as you befriend people around you, you'll be ok.

 

[Mike32ct]

Knowledgable post here. When I sarge - I go solo.

If some girl asks where your friends are "oh they just left - I'm finishing my beer"
(simple to explain your lack of social proof)

I like this line. I have to remember this one.

you'll get a "come join ME"(not always)

or you can move on to the next.

I generally wont go and join another group - any guys in that group will set up into cawkblock mode:box:

But if the offers there, so's the interest and its up to YOU to charm her.

Absolutely. It's obviously very nice of her to offer to "adopt" you into her group. But like you, I have politely declined such offers if there are dudes in the group.

If it's all girls, fine. But I can't see some guy welcoming me into their group. Even if he's cool, it puts him in a VERY awkward position.

 

[floydb25]

Always go solo, but be social, make acquaintances, and focus on the women. Friends just get in the way; judge, compete, sabotage, ****-talk, try to tell you what you can and can't get (ie, projection), etc. Don't make friends anymore as a result. Men are your competition when it comes to women, and anything related to them (eg: nice car, flashy clothes, social ability, looks, etc). IME, they just try to bring you down below their level, and try to get you to fail.

 

[Sandow]

You guys have motivated me to go out solo tonight, good job. I shall report my field report tomorrow.

 

[J Roc]

I'm going out to a club alone tonight. I do my best work when I'm by myself.

 

[Purefilth]

^^ half the time I leave my phone at home.

Don't need it. If I go for a number instead of a lay then a napkin and a pen will suffice.

What's gonna happen? Me not taking my fone for a beer going to affect how she sees me?

There's always "give me your phone. I'll call mine and call you later" - works for me anyway. Just can only do if once a night or I have like 3 random numbers and trying to figure out who's who is far too much effort!

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Don't go out alone for the sake of meeting girls. Don't be goal orientated because if you don't meet a girl that night, you will feel like sh1t. And who needs that kind of pressure anyway. It is supposed to be a good time. If it is honestly fun for you, do it. Nobody is going to think any less of you unless you think less of yourself. There is nothing wrong or different about it really.

Just again, if you enjoy it, do it. If you don't, stay at home. Personally, I can't stand clubs and think that they are one of the worst places to try and meet women outside and second only to POF.

 

[plate's_empty]

Espi, Mike, Playherman, Purefilth, Sandow, and the rest. AGREED. I thought I was the only one that has been witness to this great phenomenon.



At my age most of my friends have coupled up, and or gotten married. The once solid wingmen have all but been disapearing. so I've been forced to make do.

What I thought at one time would be almost down right embarrassing has turned out to be simply awesome.

If you're alone there's a better chance that girls will come up and talk to you. If they like you from a distance they don't have to worry about having to entertain your friend. Or your friend getting in the way. You'd be surprised how many women go out alone as well. You don't notice it because they're all talking to guys. And people just assume they came with them. They'll talk to them just for company while they're scoping out the place....and boom, single guy by himself.

Sets work too, one guy is less threatening than two. Easier to get rid of if they don't like you. I've been pulled over to tables of sets just so they have someone there so they have a reason to shoot down other guys.

If you're not comfortable going out alone, that's understandable. Here's what you should do:

Go to the bar. The bar is your friend, sit down order a drink. If nothing's going on around you, watch TV, or better yet, strike up a conversation with the bartender or the people next to you. Since you are alone, they will see that you're just being social. Girls will come up to the bar to order drinks. While they're waiting for their drinks, talk to them. Very easy to turn your head to the side say something, then turn back. EASY, they're standing, you're sitting, non threatening, they came up next to you (for a drink). Very easy for them to engage in conversation for a minute then they leave. Were you hitting on them?? Or were you just being social?? They don't know. If you did good they will go back to their friends talk about you then come back for more. If not they won't come back...Great!! Next one, and the cycle continues. Next thing you know you'll have three or four girls you're talking to, going back and forth trying to pull you back to their table.

By all means I have such a higher percentage of going home with a girl than when I'm with a friend. Also, if a girl's out to get some, yes they go out to possibly get laid too. If you don't have a friend with you and they think they might like you, they don't have to worry about a friend getting in the way or thinking she's a slut. I've left with girls within 10 minutes of meeting them when I've been out on my own. Never happened that quick when I was with friends.

The only bad thing, is validation. But if you're social, you can get away with that. And, I tell them the truth, my friends are all coupled up, and I wanted to go off on my own tonight.

I've told my friends about this but they still don't think it should work and/or don't have the balls to go out alone. I'm not surprised some of you guys have figured it out....

 

[visions]

Just again, if you enjoy it, do it. If you don't, stay at home. Personally, I can't stand clubs and think that they are one of the worst places to try and meet women outside and second only to POF.

purefilth: i believe i recall you stating clubs is your method of choice for meeting women. if so, i'd like to get some more thoughts from you and TillTheEndofTime on clubs vs daygame, as I just do daygame. However, I'm considering giving clubs another go.

 

[Purefilth]

Here's what I mean: if you're alone in the bar, don't break out your cell phone and start texting your buds. Keep it in your pocket.

Of course, if you strike up convo with a chick, then fvuck yes...break out the cell and collect the number.

I know what you meant buddy, just putting my 2c in.
Can't stand seeing people out having "fun" when they're sat playing with a fvcking smartfone- given that feeling, I leave mine at home.

Plus, it means noone can contact me- I like to have solitude sometimes even in public places. You get me?

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

purefilth: i believe i recall you stating clubs is your method of choice for meeting women. if so, i'd like to get some more thoughts from you and TillTheEndofTime on clubs vs daygame, as I just do daygame. However, I'm considering giving clubs another go.

Quality aside, my experience has taught me time and time again that the WORST places to meet women are where they EXPECT to be approached.

The end result? Ironically "singles themed" events are where women are least likely to be receptive to a cold approach. I'm not talking about just clubs either. Any known pickup spots, singles cruises/parties, etc. They're all terrible if your goal is to meet someone.

Because singles themed places & events are where women EXPECT to be approach, the following happens:

1) Women at these places start to IMMEDIATELY size up men.

2) Women become HYPER-sensitive to ANYTHING you do/say.

3) Women look for ANYTHING to disqualify you. They don't like your nose? You're out. They don't like your eyebrows? You're out. Etc, etc.

4) The hypergamy wheel starts spinning in their heads. They're ALWAYS expecting a BETTER guy to approach after you. So they will wait out the entire night if they want (because they can) for the bigger, better deal.

 

[Purefilth]

@ Visions - sorry missed that. ^In response to the same quote.


TTEOT - as usual is bang on. If you don't look right, you will struggle. In a club, if I approach the right girl I can kiss close within a minute. (Obviously not all the time)
You have to pick your targets and you have to be able to TAKE the target, or you become that creepy guy that hits on everyone in the space of 2 approaches.

Honestly I prefer daygame. Solo to the club is my favorite way to go sarging clubs because I don't have to worry about wings fvcking up/ helping them out and can't feel bad about abandoning them when I grab a cab. But daytime girls are so much more receptive its unreal. You just have to say hi, have a sense of humor and a lil bit of kokkyness about you and the balls to ask for a number.

I prefer 80% of girls I meet daytime.

3 current plates met at.-
Gym.
Supermarket.
Social circle.(make this as big as possible for 'social status' and opportunities)

Meeting club girls rarely develops touch more than ONS- and I swear its getting harder lately to get that even. Or maybe its always been this way and I never noticed it before.

If you really want to slay some poon? Get a job as a barman.I did for 5 years and always picked up chicks with minimal effort. Plus you'll see a LOT of club approaches and get a real good idea of what it takes for the lafa who aren't rocking the "sexy new barman" status.

(Lol on a sidenote there was a poll set up on a website locally and I won it as sexiest barman in my town irrelevant I know, but hey I loved that status back then)


Hope this helps.