Giving up

[RestUnknown]

In my last thread

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/thread...orum-only-going-downhill.238978/#post-2405041

there is a post about deesade where he says I'm a probable lost cause. Well the last few weeks I feel he's right. My mindset is completely f*cked up. I'm hovering at the edge of depression, and I actually think I am. I sleep as long as possible because I have nothing to do besides going to the gym for one hour or going to work during the week.

I have a few friends, but today they went out and I just stayed in because it's always the same old story. Going to a bar, talk about games or 'wow she's hot' (and of course never approach her).

I'm an introvert there is no denying that, but I can't hold a conversation with anyone for longer than a minute. I can't even do this with my family. I'm ashamed when I'm around them, because I'm the weirdest family member. I project this very low self confidence in everything I say and everyone of course senses this.

Everyone can say that I just don't try and I can say what I want, but believe me I did. I simply don't have the energy anymore. Although I don't want to be like this, I still think you have to have something in you that can make this happen. But for me I honestly believe there is nothing.

Every day feels like a struggle, I'll never kill myself, but I'm just not happy. I don't get any joy out of anything anymore. Recently I skydived and didn't feel anything, I stepped out of the plane without any emotion.

I know this will generate the same responses as in my other thread, but I just needed to get this of my chest.

 

[Building_and_Loan]

In my last thread

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/thread...orum-only-going-downhill.238978/#post-2405041

there is a post about deesade where he says I'm a probable lost cause. Well the last few weeks I feel he's right. My mindset is completely f*cked up. I'm hovering at the edge of depression, and I actually think I am. I sleep as long as possible because I have nothing to do besides going to the gym for one hour or going to work during the week.

I have a few friends, but today they went out and I just stayed in because it's always the same old story. Going to a bar, talk about games or 'wow she's hot' (and of course never approach her).

I'm an introvert there is no denying that, but I can't hold a conversation with anyone for longer than a minute. I can't even do this with my family. I'm ashamed when I'm around them, because I'm the weirdest family member. I project this very low self confidence in everything I say and everyone of course senses this.

Everyone can say that I just don't try and I can say what I want, but believe me I did. I simply don't have the energy anymore. Although I don't want to be like this, I still think you have to have something in you that can make this happen. But for me I honestly believe there is nothing.

Every day feels like a struggle, I'll never kill myself, but I'm just not happy. I don't get any joy out of anything anymore. Recently I skydived and didn't feel anything, I stepped out of the plane without any emotion.

I know this will generate the same responses as in my other thread, but I just needed to get this of my chest.

Man you sound like you might have a chemical imbalance to be honest. I know because a friend of mine has struggled with depression a lot of her life and some of what you say sounds familiar.

If you're skydiving and that doesn't get the endorphins flowing, something could be wrong. It's ok, not your fault, and there are medications to help with it.

Just keep at it and remember - no matter how good things are or how bad things are, they're going to change.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

As you think, so shall you become.

At this point, your life sucks and you just seem to suck at life. Like me when I was 11. So I'm gonna tell you something similar to what my dad told me when I was feeling like you that completely changed my life.

Just tell yourself that you are awesome, fun, social, etc. Whatever traits you want to have in yourself, tell yourself that you are them. For me at that age, I thought I had horrible luck. So my dad told me to just say to myself that I had the greatest luck in the world, even if I didn't believe it. I said it to myself constantly, dozens, if not hundreds of times each and every day. After a year, I noticed that I truly started to have the best luck ever. What you need to do is tell yourself over and over again each day that you are social, outgoing, fun, awesome, etc. Just try it. After a year, you WILL notice a big difference. Even if something doesn't go your way or if you get rejected, immediately tell yourself how it went better than you thought because (list whatever reason how it could have gone worse or something). It'll suck and be annoying at first, but at this point what do you have to lose?

 

[Urbanyst]

I would love to help. I think your problem can be fixed. A lot of us have been there.

I think a big cause of low self-esteem in people these days is when we compare our selves to people who are dramatically different from us. Basically a fox tries to be like and hang out with wolves. The fox has different strengths and weaknesses so he never really fits in with the wolves. But he plays by wolf rules, does wolf activities and dates wolf women. Then he wonders why he is miserable. This leads him to feel inferior and bad about himself.

The solution is for the fox to stop trying to be a wolf and accept being a fox. If you are a nerdy guy, you won't fit in with body builders. So don't try to. If your current social and family situation makes you feel rejected, it just means you are a different type of person than the people you are surrounded by.

I would start there. What are you better at than most people? What are your strengths? Only focus on those and develop them as much as you can. Embrace being a fox and ignore the wolves. Your ego will thank you.

Self acceptance is the most important thing you can do. It changed my life and gave me the rock hard frame I have today.