Giving compliments

[Rollo Tomassi]

Beware the unearned gift.

There are compliments, there is flattery, and there are bribes.

 

[jophil28]

I was walking across the street and this group of 5 or 6 women were walking the opposite way. I could hear them chatting from across the street but when they walked by me they were silent. I said Hi and kept walking wondering why they did that.

I would have stopped them in mid stride and said something a bit cheesy like, " Ladies - I notice that you all went silent when we passed each other.
So you DID recognize me ? I am flattered . "
And then say nothing and just stare at them . Watch the blushing and fumbling .
Priceless.
The bravest of them MAY ask who you are, or they typically will go into girly blushing and giggling.
You may even decide to continue walking along with them and chat a bit. Who knows what can come out of these moments .
Ahhh ! Fun with women - love it !

 

[jophil28]

If a woman gives you a verbal compliment thats almost a lock that shes interested.
.

True that - this is her "door opening" behavior- she is inviting you to walk into her life. BUT if you do not step up and act quickly she frequently will slam the door shut and you are Friend Zoned forever. Women appear to RESENT a guy for NOT acting on their invitation and will punish a guy who ignores this "open door" or who dithers.

Take it from a recovered "ditherer"

 

[Jitterbug]

Compliments should be sincere and rearly given. Cheers!

Sincerity is enough, IMO. If you're sincere (to yourself and others), very very few human beings would deserve frequent compliments.

I would have stopped them in mid stride and said something a bit cheesy like, " Ladies - I notice that you all went silent when we passed each other.
So you DID recognize me ? I am flattered . "
And then say nothing and just stare at them . Watch the blushing and fumbling .
Priceless.
The bravest of them MAY ask who you are, or they typically will go into girly blushing and giggling.
You may even decide to continue walking along with them and chat a bit. Who knows what can come out of these moments .
Ahhh ! Fun with women - love it !

Good one! I've had that happen to me a few times and couldn't think of much on the spot apart from a "Hi" and a wink. That's a cool opener. Gonna steal that from you, mate.

 

[jophil28]

Good one! I've had that happen to me a few times and couldn't think of much on the spot apart from a "Hi" and a wink. That's a cool opener. Gonna steal that from you, mate.

Be my guest - we are a lot more spontaneous and congenial up here in the Sunshine State than you guys down south.
YOu need to loosen up a little..

How it going in the dance scene in Vic . ?

 

[Jitterbug]

Be my guest - we are a lot more spontaneous and congenial up here in the Sunshine State than you guys down south.
YOu need to loosen up a little..

Yeah it's kinda hard to loosen up when it's butt-freezing one moment and sweaty the next, all in the same day. Besides, I have an excuse of being young.

How it going in the dance scene in Vic . ?

Fantastic! I'm mainly in the swing scene (which gets bigger and better all the time here) but also dabble in the salsa scene. I'm moving up the ranks quickly and it's heaps of fun. Getting a taste of the prize mentality with followers fighting each other off to grab me for a dance, and it's so easy to get hosted when I travel for festivals or competitions.

Gonna ask you old fox sometimes about the art of spinning plates at the same venue, as I reckon I can do better than spinning one plate per dance venue I go to.

 

[Scaramouche]

Compliments are an inneffable aspect of charm,only really effective when unseen as being compliments,far more effective when paid to less attractive aspects of a woman,with a really attractive women,then the opposite applies find her finest feature and play it down...But don't we all like a little jam?

 

[jophil28]

Yeah it's kinda hard to loosen up when it's butt-freezing one moment and sweaty the next, all in the same day.

Ahhh ! Melbourne ! Delightfully unpredictable - I know all about those hourly weather changes - 6 years at RMIT was enough. Nice restaurants though !

Hmmm..Spinning multiple plates at dance class eh ?.
Firstly, get your head right, THis is a dance class, not your engagement party. I gather that you BELIEVE that it is good form to stick with one girl after you have established that connection with her. Perhaps you think that if you just walk off and dance with someone else you will come off as rude and crass ? Here is my "rule " I only stay with one women at dances IF I have invited her there, arrived with her AND are sleeping with her.

Maybe you are too 'Melburnian' for your own good . Ha ha !

 

[Jitterbug]

Ahhh ! Melbourne ! Delightfully unpredictable

Yeah, just like women.

Hmmm..Spinning multiple plates at dance class eh ?.
Firstly, get your head right, THis is a dance class, not your engagement party. I gather that you BELIEVE that it is good form to stick with one girl after you have established that connection with her. Perhaps you think that if you just walk off and dance with someone else you will come off as rude and crass ?

Oh, I should've clarified.

On a typical dance night, I'd dance with at least a dozen different chicks. My target(s) would be among them, but I'd dance & socialize with all sorts: young, old, pretty, ugly, slim, fat. I even dance with other guys sometimes just for fun.

I'm a swing dancer. You know all those swinger slangs come from our dance, right? We love swapping partners.

Here is my "rule " I only stay with one women at dances IF I have invited her there, arrived with her AND are sleeping with her.

Maybe you are too 'Melburnian' for your own good . Ha ha !

Oops I even dance with other girls when my date is around. Usually she also dances so she'd be dancing with other guys too. I don't mind it at all.

Nah my problem is this: I sometimes have several targets at the same venue who are interested in me and vice versa. More often than not, they know each other. I used to have a policy that I'd only game one target per venue (I go to a lot of places) mainly because I knew that my game wasn't (and maybe still isn't) tight enough to deal with it.

Example: right now I have 2 really cute blonds (with smokin' dancer body, of course) at this venue both throwing IOIs at me left right & center. They know each other (one in the senior dance troupe, one in the junior one)) but aren't friends. I have great chemistry with both when we dance (we always attract a crowd watching us) and talk. I want to be able to game one (or both at the same time?) and still keep my chance with the other.

 

[jophil28]

I want to be able to game one (or both at the same time?) and still keep my chance with the other.

I think that you just need to apply SOP here. This situation of yours in not really about the dance scene, so much as your skills generally.
I would do this - get the digits and emails and start bantering with one or the other outside the venues. Take these chicks OUTSIDE the usual venues and game then in a setting which YOU control.
THis how the Ballroom guys operate - smooth and sharp at the same time.
WE get them OUT of the studio fast. When you see them again at a class, it is back to being dancers ONLY.

 

[edger]

Anybody advise on giving compliments?

I find the best way is not to give them too much but the odd time.

A simple compliment really has an effect on a woman.

I advise guys to only give compliments if she asks, but in a way that doesn't come off as pedestalizing her. She already knows she's hot. No need at all to reinforce it.

It should be understood, that a woman + an ego, is a bad combination. Because women use their egos in negative ways. "Attention wh*ring" should ring a bell.

 

[leftForDeadPhoenix]

I got a similar "complment" tonight. Was pass a group of teenagers (about 3 girls and 5 boys (probably AFCs) ) and a little blondy loudmouth shouted "hey" at me as myself and my cousin approached. I looked at her smiled and said "helloooo" and she shouted out "sexy" to me. She was with her boyfriend and it was like she was the boss.

My AFC cousin was there too and he frooze. It's amazing how a little girl can intimidate a 6ft 2 young man.

No shyt. I had a chick tell me she wanted to show me her panties. And her bf looked at me like wtf, man? And I looked at him back like what the hell just happened? Thought we was going to fight. Luckily he was about my size and we didn't.

 

[Jitterbug]

I think that you just need to apply SOP here. This situation of yours in not really about the dance scene, so much as your skills generally.
I would do this - get the digits and emails and start bantering with one or the other outside the venues. Take these chicks OUTSIDE the usual venues and game then in a setting which YOU control.
THis how the Ballroom guys operate - smooth and sharp at the same time.
WE get them OUT of the studio fast. When you see them again at a class, it is back to being dancers ONLY.

Thanks, will do. I just got the digits of one the other night. Will get those from the other one tonight.

 

[romangod]

I advise guys to only give compliments if she asks, but in a way that doesn't come off as pedestalizing her. .

I totally agree. A man should not pedestalize a woman and risk being branded a pedephile. Cheers!


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