"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Give me 4 reasons why you deserve my phone number?

dopexile

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So, I know some of you dudes are anti-internet but I've been bored at work with some free time. I've been exchanging emails with this 25 year old girl HB8 enjoying myself. I've made her jump through all kinds of hoops and asked her "what are three qualities about yourself that would make me want to get to know you better?"... I let her know that her answer is not cutting it and made her try again... I constantly give her reminders about what an amazing and lucky girl she is to be talking to someone as cool as myself. Pretty fun stuff. :crackup:

So anyway I asked her for her phone number and she's trying to turn things around... "And as far as talking to me on the telephone, give me 4 reasons why you deserve such a privilege." She's basically trying to play a card I already played, but I am a bit caught off guard. What would be a funny way to approach this without trying to qualify myself? Any input is appreciated. :cool:
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Señor Fingers

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I would say something like:

1. I love to have fun
2. I smell nice
3. I make a good arm-trophy
4. You like me a whole lot more than you're willing to admit right now ;)
First two are self-qualifiers. Last two flip it around with mild C&F.

Note: Dont go overboard with the qualification stuff.. it will create too much of a competitive dynamic and may kill any chance at real rapport. Get the digits, ramp up the attraction with some concise, witty banter and at the high point of the convo, you close on a date and keep it moving.
 

decades

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good for her! I would do the same thing if someone tried that sophomoric qualifying crap on me.
 
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romangod

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dopexile said:
So anyway I asked her for her phone number and she's trying to turn things around... "And as far as talking to me on the telephone, give me 4 reasons why you deserve such a privilege."



"Privilege? I thought I was doing charity work."





.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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dopexile

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Haha, I sent her a good message back and got her phone number, she got pretty defeated. So now I'll try and get a date setup. Thanks a lot for the help fellas.
 

romangod

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dopexile said:
Haha, I sent her a good message back and got her phone number, she got pretty defeated. So now I'll try and get a date setup. Thanks a lot for the help fellas.


Details please.......................
 

Mistic

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dopexile said:
So anyway I asked her for her phone number and she's trying to turn things around...
You broke character here, and gave her the upper hand. In the future, don't play this "your lucky to be talking to me" game too much, as fun as it is. It should be used sparingly if at all, and should be demonstrated by your personality, rather than you telling her. More experienced women will just see you as being insecure.
 

azanon

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dopexile said:
Some of you guys take yourselves way too seriously. :) Thanks for the ideas though, funny stuff.
Some people also go overboard on some of the techniques that can be learned here too. ;) The fact that she played your game back (certainly not a coincidence) was proof that you went so overboard, that she noticed and figured... what the h***, let's see how he likes it on the receiving end. I'm sure she's toying light-heartedly, but it still doesn't change the fact that you got caught, so-to-speak.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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edger

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Dopexpile, use sarcastic/funny humor..."because you smell like crap, wet your pants when you have to use the bathroom, make love to Asses(Donkeys), and eat straight off the dirty floor."
 

edger

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Another one I was gonna include: "because you eat with your bare toes"
 

dopexile

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romangod said:
Details please.......................
Obviously I stole some excellent ideas from various people to write that but it was still good stuff... and it worked... she liked option 4 and surrendered haha.

On 5/6/08, I wrote:
LOL!!! Thanks for the laugh. I'll tell you what, I'll do you one better and give you 5 reasons you should give me your phone number.

1) I smell really nice and make a good arm trophy.
2) Talking to you on the phone is a privledge? I thought I was doing charity work here.
3) I'm not trying to deceive you into giving me your phone number. If you don't want to genuinely give me your number, then I don't want it either.
4) If you don't want to give me your phone number, then I can always take my good karma and personality elsewhere.
5) I make you laugh far more than you are letting on. :)

Now, I don't think you are very creative since you tried to play a card I already played again and plagiarized my question to apply it to your telephone number. And I realize you're pretty busy at wherever you work at. So what I'm going to do here is write some responses for you that you can copy and paste as a reply back to me so you don't have to use your brain to be original. :)

1) I get a lot of jackasses that ask me for my phone number, so I have to be really careful who I give my number out to and you had to take the brunt of that. But you're my favorite person in the universe so here is my number...
2) OK fine you win, I can no longer deny you're awesome and amazing so my phone number is ....
3) I take myself far too seriously, and I don't find your audacity funny at all. I have to go now because I have to goto therapy. But you're super cool and I still want to give you my phone number...
4) I tried to put up a fight, but I laughed too hard reading this and I have to give you my phone number....


OK so now that I'm finished hunting a turkey with an antitank missile, let me know if you just want to play games or if you are willing to put your defenses down so we can talk like normal people. :)



On Tue, May 6, 2008 at 1:19 PM, HB8 wrote:

4) I tried to put up a fight, but I laughed too hard reading this and I have to give you my phone number.... 314.XXX.XXXX


I have castle-like walls around me... beware.
 
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dopexile

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azanon said:
Some people also go overboard on some of the techniques that can be learned here too. ;) The fact that she played your game back (certainly not a coincidence) was proof that you went so overboard, that she noticed and figured... what the h***, let's see how he likes it on the receiving end. I'm sure she's toying light-heartedly, but it still doesn't change the fact that you got caught, so-to-speak.
I don't think I care much about the outcome, more about experimenting and having fun. But I was certainly interested in finding a good way to answer a question like that... incase I run into it again.
 

dopexile

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Mistic said:
You broke character here, and gave her the upper hand. In the future, don't play this "your lucky to be talking to me" game too much, as fun as it is. It should be used sparingly if at all, and should be demonstrated by your personality, rather than you telling her. More experienced women will just see you as being insecure.
There's just something so much fun about saying "you're such a lucky girl..." and they think a compliment is coming... and then you give them a roller coaster and compliment yourself. LOL... but Yeah probably not optimal strategy
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Blue Phoenix

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Probably she´s not used to this kind of question (to qualify herself).
 

Latinoman

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dopexile said:
So, I know some of you dudes are anti-internet but I've been bored at work with some free time. I've been exchanging emails with this 25 year old girl HB8 enjoying myself. I've made her jump through all kinds of hoops and asked her "what are three qualities about yourself that would make me want to get to know you better?"... I let her know that her answer is not cutting it and made her try again... I constantly give her reminders about what an amazing and lucky girl she is to be talking to someone as cool as myself. Pretty fun stuff. :crackup:

So anyway I asked her for her phone number and she's trying to turn things around... "And as far as talking to me on the telephone, give me 4 reasons why you deserve such a privilege." She's basically trying to play a card I already played, but I am a bit caught off guard. What would be a funny way to approach this without trying to qualify myself? Any input is appreciated. :cool:
I don't waste my time with internet women. If you were just "killing" time, you would not even be too preocupied on trying to get her number. But that's beside the point.

My reply would be simple:

"I know of one reason of why I NOW changed my mind on getting your telephone number."
 

Latinoman

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Mistic said:
You broke character here, and gave her the upper hand. In the future, don't play this "your lucky to be talking to me" game too much, as fun as it is. It should be used sparingly if at all, and should be demonstrated by your personality, rather than you telling her. More experienced women will just see you as being insecure.
I totally agree with you.

The dude is so insecure that his first statement in the original post of this thread was that of JUSTIFYING his behavior to us.

I have never seen Francisco (which is into this internet dating stuff) justify his behavior (and god knows that I gave him a hard time for a long time).
 

Latinoman

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dopexile said:
I don't think I care much about the outcome, more about experimenting and having fun. But I was certainly interested in finding a good way to answer a question like that... incase I run into it again.
Fun is always a good thing. But don't kid yourself...you care about the outcome.

But here are the things that I noticed about you (you can b.s. a lot of people...including yourself...but you can't b.s. everybody in here):

1- You are insecure. Your first line in this thread was justifying to us why you were talking with an internet woman.

2- You still insecure. The above quote illustrates that.

3- Asking us to provide with ways of answering a damn email/IM/post also shows that you lack wit, that you are socially incompetent, and that you lack natural charm.

4- You will not have us there sitting by you in that date. It won't take her long to realize you are NOT the person she met via the Internet. That you are indeed a faker.

So...what are you going to do, other than getting pissed off at me? What are you going to do to improve yourself?
 

squirrels

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Señor Fingers said:
I would say something like:



First two are self-qualifiers. Last two flip it around with mild C&F.

Note: Dont go overboard with the qualification stuff.. it will create too much of a competitive dynamic and may kill any chance at real rapport. Get the digits, ramp up the attraction with some concise, witty banter and at the high point of the convo, you close on a date and keep it moving.
I especially like #4.

Although if you've established yourself physically with her, you could say, "Here's reason ONE..." and kiss her. Make it a GOOD kiss. If you're trying to pull the number, you're already closing, so a good kiss is a great note to leave on.

Then get her number and call her in 2-3 days to set up reasons 2-4. :D


LOL...wait a minute, just saw that you said you were talking via E-mail. As such, you lose your BEST weapon in seduction...physical presence. Your objective this point is NOT to get a phone number...your objective is to arrange a date so you can become a physical being before she starts looking at you as "words on a screen" and gets bored.

The phone number comes as a side-effect of the date. (to confirm and finalize plans)
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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