"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Girls Who Stare But Will Not Talk To You???

total_afc

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What do you guys do in this situation? I was at a cafe today and noticed this very hot blonde gal at a table. I order my coffee and sit at an adjacent table. I notice her staring in my direction, but not in my eye. Then, I catch her staring at me, we catch eyes and she looks away immediately. She keeps doing this over and over and so I engage in some chit chat.

I ask her how she is doing blah blah blah. Every time I ask her a question, there is an extremely long delay before she eventually answers. And then it's a very brief two or three word answer. I find this conversation extremely painful as I have to initiate everything. Also, her expression is extremely spacey. Her eyes are open wide, her jaw is slack and open, and she just stares and stares before she says anything.

How do you deal with a girl like this? Also, what is going on in her mind? She seemed to be a smart girl otherwise. She had a bio textbook out, so apparently she is a good student, very hot, but unable to communicate except for slack jawed staring and maybe a word or two after unbearably long delays.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Zerix

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Probably stunned that a hunk like you initiated convo with her haha.
 

SwaggerofaLion

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i feel the same way. girls have their eyes all on you and then when you talk to them they act all nervous. I think that it is up to guys like me and you to reduce their nervousness somehow. I think the key to this is just treating them like a friend and making them laugh since they already so attracted to us to begin with.
 

DonJoseCantosie

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yea, i think these guys hit the point. She's probably nervous/intimidated that she's getting to talk to a hunk like u. All u really got to do is be a bit playful around her, be light and flirty around her....and remember to smile. She'll feel more comfortable and then be more talkative.
 

blackbelt2k

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I know exactly what your talking about. When it happens to me, i used to think that it was my fault or that i misread the IOI's and used to just cut the convo and leave..boy was a rookie, but what you guys said makes alot of sense.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Is this some kind of a joke, if the babe was so hot I couldn't imagine her being nervous at all no matter how much of a hunk you are, she would have hunks hitting on her every day. :yes:
 

blackbelt2k

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^^^Not really, you;d be surprised.. most guys are intimidated by beautiful women, and as such, those women don't get approached much, which often may lead to them questioning their beauty.
 

~attrACTION~

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total_afc said:
What do you guys do in this situation? I was at a cafe today and noticed this very hot blonde gal at a table. I order my coffee and sit at an adjacent table. I notice her staring in my direction, but not in my eye. Then, I catch her staring at me, we catch eyes and she looks away immediately. She keeps doing this over and over and so I engage in some chit chat.

I ask her how she is doing blah blah blah. Every time I ask her a question, there is an extremely long delay before she eventually answers. And then it's a very brief two or three word answer. I find this conversation extremely painful as I have to initiate everything. Also, her expression is extremely spacey. Her eyes are open wide, her jaw is slack and open, and she just stares and stares before she says anything.

How do you deal with a girl like this? Also, what is going on in her mind? She seemed to be a smart girl otherwise. She had a bio textbook out, so apparently she is a good student, very hot, but unable to communicate except for slack jawed staring and maybe a word or two after unbearably long delays.
I get this SAME EXACT reaction from some girls. There's this one girl in my class, and I catch her eyes looking so many damn times, and she's even constantly playing with her hair, etc. Every time I ask her ANYTHING, she looks at me like I speak a foreign language. If I got a penny for every time she responded with a blank stare, or "I don't know," then I would be rich.

Other times, I'm at a store/cafe and the cashier will take my order and even repeat it. Then she will forget what I said completely. It's not even busy, but she will go completely blank like she was paying no attention whatsoever.

It's really annoying, honestly. I've come to the conclusion they're probably staring because they think I'm so ugly. Guys have told me it's a sign of interest, but whatever. I can't do anything about it so what's the freaking point. I'm insecure anyway, so it works. I know I can't be that ugly, but that's the best way for me to deal with similar situations.

I just ignore them now.
 

PRMoon

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I usually here the theme from james bond in my head and say a bunch of witty and sometimes cheesy lines...you know just to keep myself entertained?

What no number close? I'd of given her mind at the end of the conversation. If she wants to call, that's cool. If not, well there wasn't much chemistry there anyway so no big deal right? Right.
 

tmpgstx

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It's a bit more complicated, girls doing this are *really* intimidated by you. It's good they're in awe of your presence, but makes it difficult to get close as they are clammed up bigtime.

You can laugh, smile and be flirty, and they are STILL that way (from my experience). The only way to break it is to have them see another girl talking to you more comfortably. She then feels can do the same (or should be).
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DonJoseCantosie

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and is she still clams up, move on to the next.
 

total_afc

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I did not attempt the number close, as I usually get much stronger IOI's than this when I talk to a girl. At conversation's end, she gave me a VERY suspicious glance/stare over her shoulder. It just made me feel funny about the entire conversation: she made me feel like a criminal just for talking to her, when she was the one who initiated with all her staring!
 

GamePlan

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My guess would have been similar:

I notice her staring in my direction, but not in my eye. Then, I catch her staring at me, we catch eyes and she looks away immediately.
After that, I was thinking: she wasn't into you or she would have made EC.

She keeps doing this over and over and so I engage in some chit chat.
But then, i was thinking she was obviously interested in you, but a shy girl. If she had NOT been interested, she obviously would have thought "oh ****, now the ugly guy caught me starting and thinks I'm into him!!panic mode!! I'll look as far away from him as I can, now!" LOL.
 

Wizdm2th

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Offer to drive her to the rehab clinic....she's probably stoned!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

In2theGame

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total_afc said:
What do you guys do in this situation? I was at a cafe today and noticed this very hot blonde gal at a table. I order my coffee and sit at an adjacent table. I notice her staring in my direction, but not in my eye. Then, I catch her staring at me, we catch eyes and she looks away immediately. She keeps doing this over and over and so I engage in some chit chat.

I ask her how she is doing blah blah blah. Every time I ask her a question, there is an extremely long delay before she eventually answers. And then it's a very brief two or three word answer. I find this conversation extremely painful as I have to initiate everything. Also, her expression is extremely spacey. Her eyes are open wide, her jaw is slack and open, and she just stares and stares before she says anything.

How do you deal with a girl like this? Also, what is going on in her mind? She seemed to be a smart girl otherwise. She had a bio textbook out, so apparently she is a good student, very hot, but unable to communicate except for slack jawed staring and maybe a word or two after unbearably long delays.
:rolleyes: Ugh, dont even get me started on this topic. Girls can act so many ways its confusing. ive had Alot of the staring and then when you talk to them,, its like.. weird because they respond with little words.
 

total_afc

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Well, I saw the same girl again and tried talking to her again. I was terribly nervous, not because she's a pretty girl, but because her ambiguous and curt responses confuse the bejezus out of me! We made good eye contact while talking but her responses were very brief, there were the same long pauses before she replied, and she'd cut me off to talk to her friends while we spoke. I just cut it off again and said 'later.'
 
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